Cabin Fever
by Nobody's Princess
Summary: Ichigo and Rukia live alone in a small mountain town, banished from everything they once knew. But learning how to live with the scars left behind and the consequences of their choice is not easy. Slowly they will uncover their unique brand of happiness and in the process, learn how to live without wars.
1. Chapter 1

Hi Everyone!

Well this baby has been on my mind for the past couple of months. What can I say about it? Well I like it enough to publish it, so there you go. I don't recommend you read any of my previous stuff since I have to go back and edit it. I started writing fanfics when I was thirteen and I think I've come a long way since then. Hopefully you like this. There will be more a couple more chapters to this but that's it. Please be patient with me, I'm a terrible perfectionist.

PS: This story is NOT STRUCTURED. It's meant to flow, be organic but I tried to keep it as clear as possible. Hopefully I don't confuse too many of you.

Sincerely,

Stephanie

Disclaimer: I DO NOT own Bleach

Cabin Fever

He loved the smell of her skin.

He loved pressing his nose against her collarbone and breathing in. It reassured him that she was there, safe and next to him. Her hair always smelled of shampoo, the same scent would remain for a month or so before changing to whatever brand was on sale at the time. He'd sometimes get her to sit between his legs while watching TV, and as her large violet eyes fixed on the screen he'd bury his nose in her dark hair and inhale. He'd trek his nose down her neck to her shoulder where he delivered a playful nip. Sometimes she called him a dog for his fixation, when she did, he liked to show her how much of a dog he could be by running his nose down her naked body, part her legs and plunge right in.

He also loved how warm she was.

He often told her this during cold winter nights.

"_The gigai's warm"_ She'd say. She liked to remind him of their situation from time to time. Liked to remind him she was still dead and they were still traitorous deserters. He always replied with a _"Whatever"_ and a tightened grip around her waist.

In the winter they slept under seven blankets.

Every winter he tried to convince her to let him put a heater in their room. And every year she gave him the same reply.

"_No, they'd bill us a fortune, plus you're practically a heater already strawberry." _

At night, his arm was perpetually kept under her fleece top, his palm pressed against the soft, warm skin of her stomach. Their legs entangled and her feet rubbed the fabric of his pyjama pants or bare calves. Sometimes, Rukia slept with her nose buried in his neck, breathing him in with equal urgency. Sometimes she slept with her cheek on his bare chest, right over his heart.

"_I like listening to your heart beat." _She'd sometimes tell him after a round of lovemaking.

"_Yours beats too."_ He'd reply and it never failed to surprise her to find that it really did.

He was surprised to find she could cook so well. He told her so the first evening she made dinner in their new home.

"_Fool, I don't know why you thought I couldn't. I did fare for myself for decades before becoming a Kuchiki." _

But she **could** cook, and well. Somehow she knew how to make a feast out of nothing and how to condiment the blandest dish. Fish was her specialty. She said it was because growing up it was all they could find to eat.

He could also cook, but only a limited array of dishes. Sometimes, when the elderly town doctor closed up the clinic early, Ichigo would surprise her with dinner.

He loved watching her face then. He'd hear her open the door and take off her shoes in a rush. She'd put down her purse and occasionally drag a grocery bag deeper into the modest dining room that led to the tiny kitchen. He'd hear her footsteps, quick, heavy and then she'd stop dead in her tracks at realizing there were steaming pots on the stove. Her big violet eyes widened, a sweet sudden smile appeared and she'd come closer to greet him with a welcoming smile and a kiss.

At times, she called him, _"My sweet baka."_

Sometimes she'd whisper it in his ear while he kissed every inch of skin he could find. Sometimes she'd whisper it against his lips after he did an unexpected kind gesture for her.

He only knew there was no better endearment.

At times, she also called him 'darling' or 'dear' in an annoyingly sugary voice but only when she wanted something.

Ichigo feared he'd become unbearably weak willed with age on anything regarding her. When he was fifteen he'd had no trouble denying her toys, sweets, magazines. Now in his late twenties, she only needed to ask and he'd do anything in his power to get it for her. She was mindful of their economic situation, but she was also sure to let him know what she wanted for her 'birthday' or their 'anniversary.'

It went both ways, when she'd ask him what he wanted for his last birthday and he'd answered:

"_You on the dining room table"_

She'd punched him in the stomach but she'd delivered.

On his birthday he'd come home to find her naked on the table with whipping cream at his disposal.

However, age had also scarred him.

He couldn't turn a corner without looking over his shoulder, couldn't hear a dog howl without thinking of a Hollow. He couldn't let Rukia out of his sight without wondering if she was in pain. When he'd insisted they get cell phones Rukia immediately shot down the idea.

They lived in a quiet, sleepy town high up in the mountains. A town where they could not go ten paces without greeting five people. The medical clinic where Ichigo worked assisting the elderly doctor was a ten minute walk away from the preschool where Rukia worked. Ichigo **saw** Rukia walk pass the clinic every day after school on her way home. Yet he'd insisted on getting cell phones.

"_What would we use it for Ichigo? It's just another expense! You know we're barely scraping by as it is."_

"_What if there's an emergency? What if one day you have to stay late at the school? Or there's a storm and I can't get home?" _Although his excuses varied, the unspoken fear was the same. What he meant to say was; _What if they ever find us and I can't get to you?_

His persistence eventually won out and ever since then, Ichigo made sure to call her cell phone every day during her lunch break. She understood he needed the reassurance, she also understood he needed the control.

Scars and age had increased Ichigo's need to protect. His ultimate sacrifice had only worsened that need. She had now become his entire world, his sole person to protect. He grew anxious when she was not in his vicinity and at times, violent when he thought someone could be a threat. He'd already beaten up more than one asshole for looking at her the wrong way, or saying something he thought was disrespectful. Rukia knew the only reason he consented to her job at the preschool was because the only males around her were either under five years old or the seventy-three year old caretaker.

She too had changed. Once upon a time she would have resented his possessiveness. She would have fought tooth and nail to keep him in line. Would have assured him she could take perfectly good care of herself and that it was insulting for him to worry so much about her. But she was different now, for she too was scarred.

She couldn't deny the comfort she felt at feeling her phone vibrate in her pocket every day at lunch time. Couldn't deny liking the fact that she could make him jealous with just one smile at another man, be it a store clerk or someone who just happened to open a door for her. He was protective of her to the point of obsessive, but she too used it to her advantage. She too made sure that as cruel as it was, he would never be able to look at another woman without thinking of her. She found herself wanting to mark him during lovemaking as much as he wanted to mark her. Found herself needing to know where he was at all times and much as he. If their situation had caused them both to lose their minds, Rukia couldn't care less as long as she could pass by the clinic everyday and know he was in there, safe. If she was Ichigo's whole world, he was Rukia's and she no longer gave a damn.

He liked to think he was protecting her, possessing her even. But Rukia knew the truth, she knew that deep down she was the one in control. He was always trying to please her, always trying to make her feel like leaving it all behind for him had been worth it. That was why he always kept strawberry ice cream stocked in the freezer, why he took the care to go shopping with her in case there were items she couldn't reach, why even with his meagre salary he chose to use his saving to buy things for her.

She knew he didn't even realize the extent of his behaviour. Didn't quite realize how possessive he'd become, or how much he put her before anything or anyone else. Five months ago she told him to call his sisters for their birthday. She reminded him that morning over breakfast, and during their lunch-break phone call.

"_What if Soul Society finds out?"_

It hurt her to remember that three years ago he would have hiked through continents to see them_._

"_Just use a pay phone! At least leave a message! You haven't called your family in three years Ichigo." _

They'd hung up with him promising to call after work using a payphone. When he got home that night he told her he'd left them a message on the machine, a simple "Hi Yuzu, Karin. Happy birthday." Guilt bittered her food that night, guilt at knowing she had taken him away from his sisters and father, from his town and friends, guilt at knowing he didn't even mind. She lay in his arms that night, her back to his chest, unable to sleep.

"_Karin and Yuzu must hate me for taking their brother away." _She whispered to the dark.

"_Byakuya must hate me for stealing his sister."_

She hadn't realized Ichigo was still awake but as usual his words soothed her. They'd both left loved ones behind, they'd both been equally selfish. But somehow with his breath on her skin and his arms around her waist Rukia couldn't summon the guilt back. They agreed that Ichigo would call his sisters every year on their birthday. Then she fell asleep, and Ichigo kissed her temple in apology for the lie he'd just told.

Rukia was a light sleeper. Ichigo could sleep through an earthquake.

It was normal for her to wake up briefly at least three times a night. Decades of living in the streets conditioned her to be constantly cautious of her surroundings, especially when asleep. Then decades of waking up to the sound of Hollow attack warnings reinforced the habit. Sometimes in those interludes of awareness Rukia liked to stare at Ichigo.

He'd grown unbearably handsome with age. His jaw defined, his cheekbones strengthened and his scowl softened. He was her handsome baka and he drew considerable attention because of it. Weeks after he got the job as the assistant of the local elderly doctor, the small clinic noticed a considerably increase in young female patients. They came as far as from the next town, scraped knees and all, to have the doctor's handsome assistant patch them up. She prided herself in not blatantly displaying jealous tantrums, after all, Rukia Kuchiki won her battles against silly love struck high school girls and other young women with finesse.

In the town's eyes, they were a young married couple, Mr and Mrs Kuroki and they wore the wedding bands to prove it. So after his first week of work, Rukia surprised him with a framed picture of herself and strict instructions to put it somewhere where his patients could see. The gesture greatly amused Ichigo and he followed her instructions if only to see if her plan would work. It did, and although the clinic was still frequented by a large number of young female patients, they all understood that Kuroki-sensei was happily married.

The first time Ichigo called Rukia '**wife**' was while they were on their forth bus to the middle of nowhere. An elderly woman asked him if he was going to the mountains on vacation with his girlfriend.

"_No, my wife and I are planning to move here." _he replied.

Rukia had been pretending to snooze on his shoulder, if only to avoid acknowledging their actions. The further away they got from Karakura, the safer they felt but also the more reality sunk in. Hearing Ichigo call her his wife assured her that they would be fine, that he didn't regret his choice.

Watching her **husband's **face as he slept, his relaxed features and soft intakes of breath, she felt at peace. She was his dreamcatcher and she dutifully carried out her sacred mandate to keep his nightmares at bay. There were times when bad dreams could be soothed away with caresses and comforting whispers. But there were other times when only a slap or a punch could release him from the images. No matter what kind of nightmare he could have, she made sure she was there for the fallout.

She also liked to see him naked.

She liked to watch him step out of the bathroom in only a towel and then watch him take it off to get dressed in their bedroom. He called her a pervert whenever he caught her staring, she'd always answer that at least she didn't have paedophilic tastes. She knew how much the comment annoyed him, but the anger and disbelief in his eyes worked to reassure her. Rukia didn't fool herself, her breasts were small and perky, her waist tiny and although her gigai did age, it aged very slowly. She didn't like to stand beside him facing a mirror. He towered over her, and she looked too small, too **different**.

Her height rarely used to bother her before he came along. In fact, she always thought it came in handy. In Rukongai her petite frame saved her from suffering harassment and as a Shinigami it made her opponents underestimate her. Her height always seemed to give her an advantage, but now with just Ichigo in her universe it made her insecure. How could she compare to the voluptuous beauties that came to him at the clinic?

She knew well how ridiculous it was for her to be jealous, but it couldn't be helped. The old Rukia **knew** that those women didn't interest him for the same reason Yorouichi, Matsumoto and Inoue hadn't. She knew that somehow, he preferred her over all the voluptuous women of the world. But for the Rukia whose entire universe revolved around Ichigo, she couldn't help the tint of insecurity she felt every time a pretty patient greeted him in the street.

Rukia was no beauty, yet he told her she was beautiful with every caress, kiss and lick of her body. She had no sex appeal, yet she knew what standing naked before him did to him. She was tiny and weighed nothing, yet they both loved the fact that he could easily lift her up to kiss her breathless.

"_You're mine midget" _He'd tell her, as if the fact itself explained all the mysteries of the world. Perhaps, for him it did.

Sometimes, during the hot summer months when they didn't sleep with a blanket, Rukia would stay awake for hours looking at Ichigo in all his naked glory. Saturday nights were theirs, marathon sex followed by languid Sunday mornings was their weekly ritual. It was especially during those nights that Rukia liked to watch him. His long, elegant neck, his strong torso, his stomach muscles, his belly button and pelvis, it inspired her to draw his portrait, to write a poem, perhaps even to take a picture. It was during those moments that she wished she could draw still life, or compose poetry like he could, or buy a camera at the risk of having a naked picture of him circulating around town. Finally, after some time of watching him sleep, Rukia would finally give in and wake him up with sweet kisses and rhythmic grinding. Sunday morning sex was always the most delicious part of the ritual.

* * *

><p>He liked to watch her at work.<p>

She didn't know this, but sometimes he sneaked out during his lunch break to watch her play with the children. He knew his actions fit the description of a stalker, but he justified it every time by saying he was merely making sure she was safe. He stayed hidden in the bushes and watched her push swings, chase kids, kiss fingers better and hold babies that were too young to play. The preschool doubled as a daycare centre, the only one in the area. Rukia was one of the four teachers that staffed the preschool. She took care of the youngest children and helped supervise the older ones during lunch and recess. Ichigo was used to seeing her with a baby in her arms or at least two children in tow. She could handle the most stubborn child and because of that she often got assigned the tougher cases: The little boys who were just a tad too violent, the little girls who were socially challenged, or the baby that always cried. They always ended up falling in love with her and he understood why.

Sometimes he could admit to himself that the real reason why he liked to watch her like this was because he yearned for something they could not have. Ichigo watched her hold babies all the time, yet he couldn't help feeling sorry that he would never get to see her holding their own child. A little boy or girl with his curse of hair and her gift of eyes. They never spoke about it, but both knew that her gigai was unable to bear children. She liked to remind him that it was miracle enough that she even had a permanent gigai.

He wished he could give her everything, a house, economic stability, children, friends. But their reality only allowed for so much.

"_Fool, we're happy aren't we?" _

It was her trademark saying for whenever he went off into 'I wish' land. And it worked, because they were happy, because they were together. But still he watched her, surrounded by children, wishing they could be theirs. Perhaps one day, in a few more years he'd suggest they adopt. Until that day he would continue to look at the ethereal smile she reserved strictly for children from the safety of the shadows.

He'd never admit it, but she was a good actress.

She always knew exactly what to say, when to say it and how to say it. It was thanks to her that they were considered respectable members of society. When they first arrived in the little town they were immediately the cause of suspicion. Where they runaway criminals? Drug dealers? They spent their first week living in a hostel but their money was running out and they needed jobs. Rukia began strategizing from the moment they arrived. She even choreographed an emotional tète à tète with the hostel's owner Mrs Asakura during one stormy night. She'd told the gossipy hostel owner that she came from a wealthy, powerful family and that while in high school she'd fallen in love with the son of a town doctor. They'd endured a 'trying love' for over five years before Ichigo finally proposed to her and married her in secret. In order to spend their lives together they'd both chosen to run away and leave their families behind. The woman had been so completely moved by Rukia's revelation that she made sure to propagate the story around town. Soon after that Mr and Mrs Yamita offered to rent them a house for a very reasonable price and job offers to suit Ichigo's medical experience and Rukia's made-up childhood education experience eventually followed.

Thus, the **Kurokis** were quite popular among the elderly residents of the small town, as was evident by the steady stock of fresh garden-grown veggies in their kitchen. But Ichigo knew keeping up appearances took work and even he was forced out of his anti-social attitude at times for the sake of their lives here. With practice, he learned to smile kindly throughout entire dinner conversations about the weather. Learned to listen patiently to patients' rants about their conclusive self-diagnosis and even grudgingly agreed to put on ears and whiskers for the pre-school's annual festival.

He used to be... different.

Although he didn't realize it at the time, he used to have a lot of friends. Childhood friends, school friends, Shinigami friends, fighting friends. Sometimes, during those rare instances when he was able to just sit out in the porch, stare at nature and think, he liked to try to piece together exactly how he'd ended up here. He found the more they stayed away from Karakura and Soul Society, the more past facts seemed to simply slip his mind. Sometimes he confused the order of battles, other times he confused the people involved. He depended on Rukia to help clarify and separate his clumped past.

Last time he tried to shed light on his lapsed memory he'd been sitting out on the porch during a particularly hot Sunday. He heard Rukia yell from the kitchen to come help her and next thing he knew they were both sitting on the porch eating cold watermelon.

"_Rukia, how many more wars where there after Aizen?"_

"_You don't remember?" _

"_Of course I remember, they all just... blend together I guess. I'm just trying to pinpoint when Yamamoto started meddling. Was it right after Tsukishima?"_

"_I got assigned back to Karakura during Tsukishima" _

"_Yeah, I remember..."_

He remembered seeing her for the first time in over a year. Remembered her short hair and shiny Lieutenant badge. He also remembered wanting to lock her up in his closet to keep her from leaving him again. He remembered their first kiss, remembered the first time he touched her waist, her thighs. Remembered the first time he licked her lips and the first time he bit her shoulder. They had progressed slowly, he didn't even kiss her until his second year of University. They agreed to be 'together' after that, no more accidental touches, hidden meanings and fleeting hand holding. But their relationship had to be kept a secret in order to keep Rukia in Karakura. Then the world turned against him as he was forced to make a decision. He was ordered to never again use his powers as long as he was alive, or risk being considered an enemy of Soul Society and be jailed for eternity. His powers had grown beyond Soul Society's control and Yamamoto feared his inability to retrain the Ryoka. Then Yamamoto smartened up. Why lose the ultimate weapon out of fear when he could control it using heartstrings? Rukia was the perfect tool for coercion. He only needed to order for the girl to be put to death again and he'd have Ichigo and his powers at his disposal.

"_That fucking old croon... I'll never forgive him"_ Ichigo threw the white and green remnants of watermelon into the wilderness as if it would somehow manage to kill the Captain Commander.

Three years ago, Ichigo Kurosaki stormed Soul Society one last time. This time he did it without friends, or allies. An entire decade after having gained his Shinigami powers he walked into the Sereitei, immobilized all who tried to stop him with his Riatsu alone, and once again rescued the girl who'd given him part of her soul ten years ago.

Yamamoto got the message, he allowed them to walk out of the Sereitei and agreed not send anyone after them as long as they stayed away from Soul Society and Karakura. No communication, no visits, **nothing**. Breach of contract would be met with the immediate death of everyone he cared about.

Sometimes power could cost someone everything.

With the last of the watermelon eaten, Ichigo tugged at his **wife's** arms until she was sitting in between his long legs. She leaned back against his naked chest, her eyes closing as he ran his finger tips up and down her slender arms, to her stomach and down her thighs. Her soft, sleepy voice broke his concentration.

"_Love you, baka"_

He smiled. The words were rarely spoken out loud, but they were said all the time. He leaned down to kiss her sticky cheek.

"_Same"_

Yes, Ichigo was different. His family and friends were now one person. His social life consisted of dinners with his landlord and landlady, his boss or sometimes Rukia's co-workers. But for this Ichigo, it was enough, **she** was enough. In the eyes of everyone around them the Kurokis were an inseparable young couple. The young man was solitary but kind, the young woman was sweet through stern. They were gladly welcomed into the small community and the sight of the two walking together side by side was now part of the town's sights. No one could ever suspect the burden they shared, or the scars they both bore, but no one need ever know for they were perfectly content within their tiny universe.

"_Fool, we're happy aren't we?" _

* * *

><p>Thanks for Reading<em>, <em>please review. It'll help me update :)_  
><em>


	2. Chapter 2

Hello again! Sorry this took a bit to finish. I wanted this to be decent, and I think it got there. Not perfect, mind you but if I keep editing it you guys won't read it till next year.

I really want to thank: Evangelion 5.0, Jitchoo, sleeplygirl, MeoNg, lilica, littleRuu, Cero Oscuras, Serina Tsuki, andraq, Thornspike, Mageida, and MdNyt

I dedicate this chapter to you! Thanks so much for your support, it helped me get it done.

As a rant, I just finished watching the forth Bleach movie. It was definitely not my favourite. I found the whole 'master of the universe' thing too cliché. And no, I'm not just saying that because it 'ships' Ichigo/Orihime. I actually think it doesn't ship anything, between the dialogue rants of going to save "Rukia and everyone" and the little looks Ichigo exchanged with Orihime in the credits, I think it just implies he's a male with a harem. My problem with the movie is that it lacked heart, Ichigo seemed like such an immature, brooding little brat that I just wanted to kick him a bit. Either that or just put him in a diaper, talk about unsolved childhood trauma. I was also shocked by how blatantly the writers dismissed the fact they **tortured** Rukia in **hell**. I mean, come on! All in all, it just lacked cohesiveness, great animation though. Well that's my five cents in the argument.

Disclaimer: Bleach and its characters do not belong to me... anyone else kinda does though

Part II

She disliked reminiscing.

But it was impossible not to when Ichigo was asleep on her lap. He loved napping **on** her and he never missed an opportunity to indulge. Oftentimes she'd be peacefully reading a book or a magazine only to feel him lie down beside her and rest his head on her thighs, or stomach or butt. She always complained, but they both knew she rarely pushed him off.

Naps on her lap were lengthy and done while she read. He'd lie down on his side, place his head on her thighs and bury his face in her stomach. Naps on her stomach were pretend. He'd feel his head go up and down with every breath until she rolled him down because he was too heavy. He once tried napping on her butt, but she managed to kick his head with her heel bone after he couldn't resist biting the plump skin of her behind. Naps on her breasts were intimate. He'd kiss the nipples and nestle the soft skin after he climaxed inside her. They also occurred when he awoke screaming from nightmares, then she'd gently lead his face to her heart and coax him back to sleep by running her fingers through his orange hair.

The more she thought back, the more she realized how much things had changed, how much **he**'d changed.

"_You've gotten soft on me Ichigo"_ She'd sometimes tease him, but that was barely the tip of the iceberg. He usually replied with a cocky, perverted smile and a comment on how he didn't ever want to hear her say that at night.

But he had changed, and not always for the better. He was more focused now, like a predator watching his prey, determined and calculating. He was calmer, it took much to rattle him but he was also more prone to unnecessary acts of violence. He no longer trusted freely, now his trust had to be earned by those around him and even then he remained guarded.

She knew well who was to blame: Soul Society, the wars, Hollows, herself and Yamamoto. Somehow that last act of betrayal wounded him more deeply than any war. Seeing the people he considered his friends, allies and family encourage him to give up, to leave it all be, delivered the killing blow to the boy he once was.

She didn't blame them, how could she? She couldn't help but feel they'd been right. After a decade of fighting, his friends and family had merely wanted him to lead a **long** and peaceful life. He'd fought in more wars and seen enough bloodshed to last him a dozen lifetimes. Why go through more? Why hurt himself more? Everyone told him to take the Captain Commander's offer, to promise never to use his powers again while alive, to live out his life. And when Yamamoto took her for blackmail even her Nii-sama told him to stay out of it. As long as Ichigo showed no interest in the bait, Byakuya knew that time and pressure would eventually cause Yamamoto to yield and surrender Rukia unharmed.

But Ichigo would have none of it.

He'd felt betrayed and nothing would ever be the same.

"_Won't you miss your family?" _Rukia desperately asked as she watched him fill a suitcase with clothes. She was still in spirit form and struggling to process that he **wanted** them to run away forever.

"_**You**__'re my family too" _He'd replied with conviction that left no room for doubt.

They'd hurried over to Uruhara's for a permanent gigai and a new identity. Then using the darkness of the night, they'd sneaked away to the bus terminal and taken a bus to nowhere.

The first day they arrived at the sleepy mountain town, Ichigo announced that Kurosaki Ichigo and Kuchiki Rukia were dead.

When Kurosaki Ichigo died, parts of his soul died along with him. Sometimes she caught glimpses of the old Ichigo, the innocent, trusting, fifteen year old. But only when he was completely relaxed and they were alone. Sometimes he'd tease her like he used to when they met, sometimes he grinned like he did when he was hanging out with his friends. It worked to remind her that her innocent baka was still in there, waiting for the opportunity to come out. She hoped that perhaps time and the consistency of their little town would eventually help heal those wounds, would eventually bring some of the old Ichigo back.

Rukia remembered the way he used to look at her: like they were equals, like they were best friends. Now he looked at her like she was his whole world, his reason, his desire, his everything. He could trap her in with his stare and refuse to release her until she yielded to his wishes. It took one look from him to have her spilling out her heart.

She remembered the exact moment she realized the intensity of his gaze. He'd just started his second year of University and they were both in his room reading. She was sprayed out on the floor looking at magazines; he was on his desk with textbooks that weighed as much as her. She'd been in mid-thought when she felt a strange heat run up her spine. Instinctively, she looked up and met with a pair of amber eyes that burned right through her soul. They made love for the very first time that day.

As easily as the weight of his gaze could unmake her, she could stare into his eyes and read him in a heartbeat. One look and she knew if he was hiding something from her, if he was worried, if he was happy or horny, or both. She liked to think he was an open book to her, that nothing about him could slip her watch. She knew he sometimes drank orange juice straight from the bottle when he thought she wasn't looking. That he hated doing house chores even though he swore he didn't and that Ichigo longed for a child of their own even if he never said it. Most importantly, she knew how incredibly hard he worked every day to convince her he didn't regret choosing her.

There were times when she wondered why he didn't fall in love with someone like Inoue Orihime. If he had, his life would have been much simpler. He would have stayed in Karakura with his friends and family and led a happy, content life... hopefully with a maid to do the cooking. But instead he chose her, Rukia, a Shinigami, a person who was for all intent and purposes, dead.

"_You could have married Inoue and have a perfectly happy, normal life."_ He looked content sleeping with his head pillowed on her thighs, so much so she couldn't summon the will to move him even though her legs were long numb. _"You'd probably have a kid by now, a little boy with really bright hair, of course... Inoue would've been the perfect wife, she would've put up with all your mood swings without complaint. You'd be a doctor too, a __**real**__ doctor and you'd be working with Ichida at a hospital... you'd meet your sisters' boyfriends and scare them all away... maybe you'd walk the streets wearing the goofy grin you get after hours of sex."_ She gently ran her fingertips down his cheeks and up his forehead. She soothed the wrinkle of his scowl and gently caressed his lips. _"Would you be happier Ichigo? I know I wouldn't be, but maybe you would."_ The last part was whispered, for she'd never said it out loud.

Theirs was not the kind of relationship where they spoke for hours about their fears and feelings, their hopes and dreams. No, they preferred actions over words, bluntness over beating around the bush. They didn't share their dreams because being together, they'd learned, had to be enough for dreams. They spoke about things when they were ready to speak about them but were always honest, and even though they still fought sometimes, age and the proper outlet for sexual frustration made the fights short lived. She knew him better than anyone in the world, perhaps, she thought, better than he knew her.

Then again, he never failed to surprise her.

"_There's no place I'd rather be... ever... stupid."_

His voice was clear but his eyes remained closed, and somehow Rukia knew he'd heard it all. She was slowly learning that he too had his tricks. That he too knew how to wait for her to open up.

She chuckled and shook her head, she'd let the 'stupid' slide this time. Her lips parted to respond but her words were lost as his lips assaulted hers. He pushed her back, positioned himself directly above her. He gently bit her bottom lip, slid his tongue inside, tasting her with all the love he wanted her to understand. He ran his right hand down her cheek and neck, he groped her breasts before artfully unbuttoning her blouse. Once opened, he wasted no time licking and biting each rosy nipple, rolling it between his teeth and sucking in as much of the breast as he could. He ran his mouth down her stomach, hungrily tasting her skin. He savoured her moans and the delicious way she wriggled underneath him. And just when she thought he'd remove her shorts, he trekked back up to her red lips.

Her hips were between his legs and he was careful to avoid touching her thighs till the numbness dissipated, only she knew how long he'd been asleep on them. He was surprised to feel her small hand wrap around his naked sex. He chuckled at realizing the little minx had already removed his sweat pants without him noticing. She had an artful little hand and Ichigo had to concentrate to keep himself from finishing before the entree. He distracted her by slipping two fingers deep inside her. She gasped at the sudden intrusion but both were far too experienced by now to finish quickly. Rukia could see it in his eyes, he planned to thoroughly show her how much he didn't regret his choice. And as usual, she gladly accepted his plan. They made love until dinner time when both their stomachs began singing their own symphony. She made them a humble dinner and they ate it on the porch looking at the setting sun.

"_I never loved Inoue."_

He knew better than to solve everything with sex. There were things that needed to be talked out between them. Insecurities he needed to vanquish through more than orgasms.

"_I know... but maybe it would've been easier for you if you had."_

"_No. Nothing is easy, you taught me that. You have to fight for what you want, for what you believe in. I love you, not Inoue or anyone else, and believe it or not midget, I like being in love with you." _

He was smiling at the setting sun, a true smile, a happy smile. Then he looked straight into her eyes with an intensity that made her feel naked.

"_You make me happy Rukia." _

He was smiling like a fifteen year old fool and joy bubbled inside of her at the sight. Then he leaned in, across a plate of rice to gently kiss her lips. With the last rays of sun they retreated back into their humble home.

* * *

><p>Time passed by surprisingly quickly in the sleepy town, but the town itself barely changed at all. The same bakeries, restaurants and shops were passed down from tired parent to willing child, thus keeping the overall façade of the town and its traditions intact. Children Rukia used to teach came up to her in their primary school uniforms, 'all grown up' or so they claimed. Months went by faster than either could imagine and soon another winter was upon them. As cold and flu season began, Ichigo's hours at the clinic increased. He'd come home exhausted and hungry only to eat and rest before starting again the next day. Exhaustion was not kind to Ichigo, and his temper tended to suffer the most. While he tried not to snap at his patients, the same courtesy was not extended at Rukia.<p>

Time had taught her to be patient with him and she tried her best not to allow his bad mood to provoke a shouting fight. Nevertheless, her good intentions did not always go as planned. One particular evening when Ichigo came home in his worse mood yet, Rukia found herself forced to step outside for a while or risk mortally wounding him. She heard him curse behind her as she grabbed her winter coat and boots before opening the door and letting it slam behind her. She'd let him huff and puff by himself for an hour or so before coming back. Usually by then she found him calm and contrite.

It was cold outside, so Rukia opted to walk to the nearest convenience store for a warm drink to make time. The streets were poorly lit but she didn't mind, she was still a Shinigami after all and although she wasn't actively fighting Hollows, she had over a hundred years of experience in self defence. She had no doubt she could take perfectly good care of herself, not that anything really ever happened there anyway. She was twelve minutes into her walk when she noticed something strange by the side of the road. It looked like a human size lump and she hurried over to inspect it. She leaned over, poked the lump and after hearing a soft whimper she concluded it was indeed human and in need of help. The person was wrapped in a large blanket and she carefully pulled back a bit of blanket to reveal a head. After close inspection Rukia realized it was a girl of no more than sixteen.

What followed was a very long night. Realizing she didn't have her cellphone with her and that the girl was unconscious; Rukia draped her own jacket over the girl and ran to the convenience store for help. Minutes later the girl was inside an ambulance and on her way to the clinic where Ichigo worked. Rukia stayed with her and upon further inspection she informed the volunteer 'paramedics' that their patient seemed to be about five months pregnant. By the time ambulance arrived, the elderly clinic doctor was already waiting for them and Ichigo was on his way. After a quick examination, the doctor verified that the girl wasn't stable enough to be taken to the nearest hospital so he asked Rukai to stay and help. By the time Ichigo arrived, panting and frost bitten, he found both his boss and his 'wife' doing quite well without him.

Hypothermia, exhaustion and malnourishment were the doctor's diagnosis and the marks of abuse on the girl's body painted a clear picture a miserable life at the hands of an abuser. After the girl had been stabilized and the elderly doctor had retired back to bed, Rukia settled by the girl's bedside. Ichigo went to stand behind Rukia, his hands on her shoulder in a strange, apologetic way.

"_You should sleep a bit_." He gently told her.

"_No, I don't have work tomorrow. I think I'll stay with her until she wakes up. You should get some rest while you can. Tomorrow's going to be busy again."_

Ichigo looked at the other empty hospital beds with reluctant resignation. It looked like they would both be spending the night and unless their new critical patient miraculously recovered, the next day pointed at being gruelling.

"_Go on, I'll wake you if anything happens_." She gently caressed his hand on her shoulder. He sighed and leaned over to kiss the crown on her head. Her eyes locked with his and finally he nodded. Rukia watched him walk over to an adjacent bed and lie down before returning her attention to the patient.

At around eight thirty the next morning, Ichigo's boss Yashimora-sensei walked into his clinic to the sight of his critical patient hungrily eating a large bowl of soup while cheerfully chatting with his emergency nurse. To his amusement, his protégé remained passed out on a clinic bed.

The girl's personality turned out to be the polar opposite of what Rukia expected. She was cheerful, grateful and had an enduring sense of humour. Her name, she said, was Hitomi but she refused to give her family name for fear of being sent back. She was sixteen years old and claimed to have run away in order to keep her baby safe. That was as much information as Rukia was able to get out 'Hitomi-chan' that morning before the girl fell back asleep. Rukia stayed at the clinic for the rest of the day and by the time lunchtime came around the girl was willing to tell her more.

She explained that she had lost her mother to cancer the year before, after which a friend of her mother's took her in. Her mother's friend, she said, was not entirely emotionally stable and there were times when she could turn very violent. After the woman found out about Hitomi-chan's pregnancy, she became increasingly more and more aggressive until finally, the previous afternoon she'd given Hitomi a beating meant to make her miscarry.

"_She didn't really __**want**__ to kill me, she just wanted to make me lose the baby in order to save my late mother's honour or something like that. She's not really a __**bad**__ person, she just hears voices sometimes and gets angry."_ The girl explained while slurping her noodles.

"_That doesn't justify trying to kill you and an unborn baby!"_ Rukia offered her a glass of warm sweetened tea which the girl gladly took.

"_No but it does explain it. I rather chose a crazy but well meaning woman over some violent rapist any day." _

There was something about the girl, a spark that assured Rukia Hitomi-chan was telling the truth. When she and Ichigo finally left the clinic that evening, the girl was on her way to recovery and the local police was corroborating her story.

"_I doubt she's lying about anything Ichigo."_ It was colder than the night before so Rukia dug her bare hands deeper into her coat's pockets.

"_She seems to be pretty happy about the baby."_ Ichigo recalled having walked in on Hitomi-chan talking reassuringly to her stomach after the police took her testimony.

"_I think she ran away because she was trying to protect it."_

"_Yeah but the final decision will be up to the police and the community."_

"_She has nowhere to go, and she can't go back to that place."_

Already he could see the fire of justice and protection burning behind Rukia's violet eyes. Her selfless passion for righting injustices was the only thing that kept his will to fight alight nowadays. He didn't think Rukia realized she was all that stood between him and complete emotional numbness.

"_Knowing these people, they won't let her go back. The community council will place her with an old couple and she can raise the baby here." _

But the reassurance wasn't enough. Her scowl was still there and judging by her concentration, she was furiously trying to come up with a way to assure the girl's safety. Sighing in defeat, Ichigo pulled her close to his side, she leaned into him and together they assumed a steady pace home.

The next day after work, Rukia stopped by the clinic to see Hitomi-chan. She found the girl cheerfully chatting with Mrs Asakura and Mrs Yashimora. But the girl's eyes light up when she noticed Rukia.

"_Rukia-chan, I can stay!" _

The news appeased Rukia's conscience and she gladly joined the two elderly women in determining who Hitomi-chan should stay with. In the end Mrs Asakura was relentlessly persistent so it was decided that the girl would stay with the Asakuras until after she finished school and could take care of herself and the baby.

"_Five families volunteered to take her in! Can you believe it Ichigo? But Asakura-san was so determined that she stayed by Hitomi-chan's side all day."_

"_Why was Asakura-san so interested?" _

They were on their way home again, this time hand in hand. The police had corroborated the girl's story and after having a chat with the girl's late mother's friend, it was deemed best for her to stay in the mountain town. Sixteen seemed like such a young age to be all on her own, especially pregnant. Yet when he thought about it, Inoue lost her brother when she was thirteen and had been left alone to fare for herself after that. Most incredibly, Rukia was abandoned in the streets of Rukongai as an infant. He often wondered how she was able to survive, but somehow he never managed to ask her. What would he have done if he'd been left alone to take care of his sisters at that age? He wondered.

"_Apparently Hitomi-chan reminds her of her youngest daughter, remember the one that ran away with the bad boyfriend? I've never seen Asakura-san so happy before."_

"_It'll do both of them good. They're always glad to have company. I guess they feel lonely."_

After four years of working at the town clinic, Ichigo had learned that the biggest people-killer was loneliness. It was common here for spouses to pass away within a year of each other, often because the widow or widower stopped taking care of themselves. He understood the sentiment perfectly.

"_Yeah, the best thing about it is that she's only seven minutes away from our house." _

Rukia's happiness was contagious and they ultimately ended up racing home after she declared she could still outrun him with her eyes closed. Of course, she made sure to have a very good head start before baiting him to race her. Once inside Rukia proposed they save water by bathing together and by their second round of lovemaking, Ichigo decided that if Hitomi-chan's presence cheered up Rukia that much, the girl was free to visit their home any time she wanted.

The girl grew on you.

That much he was willing to admit. She reminded him a bit of Yuzu in the way she spoke, and a little of Karin with her sense of humour. However Hitomi-chan was entirely unique in that she was the most annoying kid he'd ever had to take care of. She liked to ask him questions about everything in the clinic and much to his annoyance, refused to shut up for even a moment. When she wasn't asking him about the fifteen different functions of aspirin, or fetus month-by-month development, she was asking him about Rukia.

"_How old is she? How long have you been married? What's her favourite food?"_

Ichigo laughed in recognition of what years ago he'd coined 'Rukia-worship' and gave her the typical answers he'd memorized for show. However one afternoon when she asked him if he ever missed his family and friends, he found himself at a loss for words. Admitting he missed them still felt like admitting he regretted his actions, like he regretted Rukia.

"_Do you miss your mom?"_ He asked her instead.

"_Everyday" _

She was going to be discharged the following morning and after a week of annoying him within an inch of his sanity, he felt the right to pry.

"_And the baby's father?" _

Hitomi-chan pinned him with her bright blue eyes, a small bittersweet smile on her lips.

"_He will always be with me, for that I'm thankful." _

He didn't ask anything else, and for the first time in six days, Hitomi-chan was quiet. That evening at dinner, he asked Rukia if she knew anything about it.

"_He's dead"_ She informed him before taking a sip of her tea.

"_Who?" _

"_The baby's father. She told me she met him at the hospital when her mother started going in for chemotherapy."_ He stopped in mid chew, once again amazed at his better half's ability to get information out of people.

"_So the baby's father died of cancer too?"_

"_No. Hitomi-chan said he had a brain tumour" _

"_He had a brain tumour and she dated him anyway?" _

"_They fell in love Ichigo. It happens." _

"_So now he's dead and she has to raise the baby on her own." _

"_Yep, and she couldn't be happier about it."_

He felt an old, familiar feeling stirring: concern. How could a child raise a child?

"_That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard."_

"_Even more than a human falling in love with a Shinigami?" _She hit him with her gaze and he choked on the comparison.

"_That's different!"_

"_How?"_

"_It's... I mean we...You were already dead! And... it's just different all right?" _

She took a bite off a chunk of beef to keep herself from laughing. But his reaction pleased her immensely, it was the first time in over four years he showed interest in a stranger's life. Gone were the days her strong baka would put himself in mortal danger for the sake of total strangers. Even in his last years working as a Shinigami he'd concentrated more on fighting and winning wars than playing bodyguard to girls in danger.

That night she lay awake a bit longer. She turned to her side and looked at the outline of his face in the dark. He'd been so reckless once, so willing to put his life at risk at the drop of a hat. Selfishly, she was thankful he had changed. Thankful she no longer had to worry that he'd do something incredibly stupid and get himself killed. But she also mourned the death of the boy who helped first and asked questions later. She suddenly remembered a conversation they had, a long, long time ago.

They'd been sitting on the roof of his house, their eyes fixed on the starry sky above.

"_It's different now"_

It was so rare for him to open up about anything that she was almost afraid to push.

"_What is?"_

"_Everything... it just feels different. I mean, I **know** it wasn't their fault but..."_

It had been bothering him for weeks. She could tell by the way he tried to act so nice and casual around everyone. He tried so hard it looked strange.

"_They couldn't help it Ichigo. Their memories were altered by Tsukishima's sword. I thought you'd forgiven them for that already."_

"_I have... or at least I thought I had. So why does it still bother me?"_

She'd just been about to say something when her Hollow tracker began to beep loudly. She'd told him that they would continue their conversation later, but somehow later never came. It was shortly after that all hell came lose, literally.

It wasn't sudden, she realized, it wasn't out of nothing. Ichigo began changing the moment she pierced him through with her Zanpakuto.

She'd tainted him ever since and led him on a journey of disillusion and distrust.

A few tears escaped her eyes but she was careful not to cry. Crying solved nothing and making herself sick with guilt wouldn't help either one of them at all. If she was selfless she would run back to Soul Society and beg Yamamoto on her knees to let Ichigo return home. She'd take all the punishments for deserting her duties and suffer the humiliation with pride. But she would never do so, because she knew leaving him would only be the final act of betrayal. The final stab to everything good and worthy that was Ichigo.

"_You keep me sane Rukia"_ He once told her, long before they left Karakura. And even though she'd answered him that he kept himself sane, deep inside she knew the truth.

"_I'm a mess without you_." He told her, years ago when he was trying everything in his arsenal to keep her with him. When they lived with the worry that every minute they spent together could be their last.

"_I need __**you**__"_ He told her on the night he decided to leave it all behind.

Sometimes, she admitted that the real reason why she'd never leave him was really because she needed him just as much as he needed her. But other times, she had to appeal to her sense of duty to keep herself from doing something foolish. Yes, she was Shinigami and yes, she'd been a Lieutenant, but now her duty lied with the sleeping man beside her. Now, her duty was to heal the most powerful human alive, and most of all, to love him with all her heart.

Tears shed and dry, Rukia finally closed her eyes for the night.

* * *

><p>The second week of January brought Rukia's birthday. It was the one day of the year Ichigo asked for the day off. The celebration always began with him making them a simple breakfast. He'd tease her a bit about being in the three digit age group and after breakfast he'd walk her to the preschool. He'd go grocery shopping and hurry to prepare her the nicest dinner he could make along with wrapping her present. It was the corniest he really ever acted, but for that one day of the year he ignored his pride. He owed it to her after all.<p>

He never knew she had a birthday until the night they snuck away to Urahara's shop for a good gigai and false documents. He remembered sitting in a room with a cup of steaming tea while his old mentor scribbled on a notepad. It was the first time Ichigo ever saw Urahara look anything but in complete control.

"_Full names will be Kuroki Ichigo and Kuroki Rukia... age... twenty five, both of you. Married of course... birthday?"_

It took him a second to realize Urahara was actually asking them for the true dates after just carelessly adding five years to his age.

"_Fifteen of July_"

Ichigo turned to Rukia, ready to help her make up a date when suddenly he heard it.

"_Fourteen of January"_ While Urahara continued to scribble away Ichigo turned to look at her with confusion. Out of everything he was feeling, the guilt, the fear, the anxiety, the one thing he found was bothering him most was that single piece of information. Was it fabricated? Or worse, was it actually true and he just didn't know it?

It wasn't until they were seated on the bus and watching streetlights rush past them that he was able to ask her.

"_Did you make up your birthday on the spot?"_ The question startled her but she answered quickly.

"_What? No, of course not."_

"_So your birthday really is the fourteen of January?"_

"_Yeah"_

"_Why the fuck didn't you ever tell me?"_

The outburst surprised her. It was random and uncalled for, yet it was obvious he was struggling to keep his voice down in the full coach bus.

"_Well you never asked."_

"_So? Don't you think this is the sort of think you should have told me **six** years ago?"_

The absurdity of the question sparked her own anger. Out of everything they'd gone through in the past twenty-four hours, **that** was he was most concerned with?

"_Why would I have told you then? It's not like I was in Karakura for that month anyway."_

He slammed his back against the seat and shook his head in disbelief.

"_How about all the **other** years Rukia? Didn't it ever occur to you to tell me?"_

Desperate to keep him from waking up any of the other passengers she pressed closer to him and continued in whispers.

"_I don't know! Some years I was in Soul Society and when I was here we were always fighting something so I probably just forgot about it." _

She said it in such an unaffected way that he wished he could at least yell at her.

"_Does Renji know?" _

"_What? My birthday?" _

"_**Yes**!"_

"_I don't know! Maybe, if Nii-sama told him. He never mentioned it."_

It was then he realized something was wrong. If Renji, who'd known her since they were children, didn't know her birthday then there had some be something else to it. He heard Rukia sigh in a near exasperated way beside him.

"_I didn't know my birth date until Nii-sama told me about Hisana-ni-sama." _She explained.

Ichigo closed his eyes and exhaled the anger away. Even the simple things were never easy with them. He didn't want it to be like this anymore.

"_We'll celebrate your birthday next year, **together**."_

He interlaced their fingers, her palm pressing delicately against his and for the first time in weeks, Ichigo saw Rukia smile. It was after that day on the bus that Ichigo swore he'd make it up to her. Now, he spent every fourteen of January making sure they celebrated properly, together.

Although he'd looked forward to spending her birthday in the usual way: food, present, cake and sex, in that order. He'd known this year would be different the moment Hitomi-chan looked for him after her last check-up to ask him what **they** were doing for Rukia-chan's birthday.

He answered he was making her dinner.

She told him she'd bring the cake.

Now the three of them sat around the table eating said cake. He had to admit, it was pretty good cake, and Rukia seemed happy for the company. It occurred t him that this was probably her first time sharing the occasion with someone other than him. He took a rather long sip of his beer can after realizing he was feeling jealous of a pregnant sixteen year old kid. Both women were all smiles as they chatted about everything from funny preschool kid stories to the latest celebrity gossip. He opened another beer can and watched them in silence. He was pretty sure Byakuya's idea of a birthday celebration consisted of a silent meal at the manor, nothing lively. He suddenly felt guilty for not thinking about throwing Rukia a birthday party. It was understandable that he didn't at first, they were new in town and hardly knew anyone. But now there were other people they could have shared the occasion with. He could have invited his boss and his wife, could have invited Rukia's co-workers and the Asakuras. He took the last sip of the can and opened a new one without a thought.

Yes, he was possessive of Rukia that, he admitted. But was he unconsciously denying her the right to friendships? The right to be social? He'd taken her away from everything she'd ever known, from her brother, her friends, her duty, her life. Rukia was like a bird, he thought, and he had captured the bird, clipped her wings, put her in a cage away from the outside world and stayed there with her. Did he have the right to hold her captive?

He tuned back to their conversation at the sound of his name.

"_Ichigo-san, what do **you** think?"_

"_About what?" _He tried sounding as sober as possible, mindful of Rukia's all-seeing eyes.

"_About me volunteering at the preschool!" _

Ichigo looked at the girl's bright blue eyes, then at her round stomach and back to her eyes. He wondered why she was asking him, until he remembered he was technically a physician.

"_As long as you're careful and you don't hold any heavy kids, you should be fine."_

The girl beamed at him. Her hands flew to capture Rukia's in a heartfelt display of happy affection. He focused on Rukia, her sweet smile, her warm eyes. He could tell the girl had already found a place in Rukia's heart and it surprised him to see she was looking at Hitomi-chan like he used to look at Yuzu and Karin.

He opened another can of beer.

Before the clock struck ten, Hitomi-chan was already on her way home to the Asakuras. Rukia and Ichigo waved goodbye to her from their door and stayed there until they saw her enter the Asakura gate.

"_You're pretty drunk aren't you."_ It wasn't a question, he thought about denying it but he thought better after seeing her smile.

"_How did you know?" _They stepped back into the warmth.

"_Because you patted Hitomi-chan's head before she left"_ Rukia closed the door behind them, a grin on her lips.

"_So I can have perfect motor skills but I can't pat her head unless I'm drunk?"_

"_You're missing the point"_

"_Which is?"_

"_You didn't treat her like a stranger." _

Ichigo knew he was suppose to stop and think about whatever she'd said, it was philosophically important somehow. But he simply couldn't concentrate with her lips moving so provocatively. Her lips were beet red from their short stay out in the cold, her cheeks were pink and she looked good enough to eat. He took a step closer, effectively trapping her between his chest and the wall. He stared into her eyes, tried to pick out her soul but gave up and ended up kissing her instead. His hands squeezed her butt before pulling her upward, her legs immediately wrapping around his waist. She clung to his neck and he assaulted her mouth until he tasted blood. He trailed open mouth kisses from her chin to her neck and grew frustrated at noting she was wearing too many layers.

"_Bedroom." _

She said, in **that** tone which even during sex made him stop and listen. He carried her to the bedroom, sat down on the futon with Rukia on his lap, facing him, straddling him. Expert hands removed her sweater, shirt, tank top, bra. She managed to pull off his sweater and shirt in one tug and soon a grinding battle began between them.

It was a good two hours later, as Ichigo was falling into a dead sleep that one last thought entered his mind. Even if keeping Rukia locked up in a cage with him was unfair, he'd never let her go. But perhaps he could sometimes allow other little birds to play with her, just as long as they had a curfew.

* * *

><p>It was the end of January when Ichigo realized that a very pregnant sixteen year old was spending much more time with his wife than him. In fact, the girl spent half a day, every day at the preschool with Rukia.<p>

"_It's great practice for when the baby arrives_!" Explained Mrs. Asakura to all who asked, and although Ichigo agreed, he didn't particularly like it.

Every day he saw Rukia and Hitomi-chan make their way home together, and oftentimes Hitomi-chan would stay at their house for a good hour or so before making her way down to the Asakura house. Although he barely really **saw** the girl, her presence was everywhere. There were five parenting magazines stacked on the coffee table and there was always a collection of fluffy cushions in the living room.

"_Doesn't Asakura-san mind that Hitomi-chan is spending so much time over here?"_

He secretly hoped their landlady lady would get overly protective of Hitomi-chan and ban her from leaving the house. Although after thinking it through, he realized that if that happened Rukia would probably move in with their landlords.

"_Of course she doesn't. She's happy that Hitomi-chan has respectable friends."_

"_You're respectable?"_

He got a kick to the gut faster than he anticipated but he relished every second. Eventually, Ichigo accepted that Hitomi-chan was going to be a permanent part of their lives and by February he's stopped complaining about the mounting parenting magazines. By mid February he was seeing her twice a month at the clinic for her check-ups.

"_Ichigo-san, what do you think of the name Sakura?"_

Ichigo looked away from a patient file to find Hitomi-chan sitting on the waiting room with her nose on yet another baby name book. It was in times like these that Ichigo wondered why Yashimora-sensei had to take an hour with each patient.

"_It's all right."_

"_Doesn't sound like you like it to me."_

"_Sakuras annoy me." _

He went back to filling out details on the patient file with the hope she'd leave it alone.

"_Ichigo-san, why do Sakuras annoy you?"_

He sighed, looked up from the file and considered the answer. For once he chose the truth.

"_They remind me of my brother-in-law." _

The girl's bright blue eyes widened in surprise, a spark appeared and a heartbeat later she dissolved into laughter. Ichigo couldn't help grinning a bit himself and they settled into a comfortable silence until,

"_Ichigo-san, what do you think of, Miaka?" _

One Saturday afternoon in March, Ichigo came home after a half day at the clinic to find two women of equal height, hair colour and toothy smiles, covered in flour. He looked from one pair of violet eyes to a pair of blue eyes and debated whether he really wanted to know what had occurred. In a split second decision, he chose to walk away, leaving two laughing women behind.

It was a good hour later before Ichigo dared venture into the kitchen again.

"_Hitomi-chan is teaching me how to bake."_ Explained Rukia, a bowl of melted chocolate in her hands. Baking, he knew, was not one of Rukia's specialties and although she'd made several attempts over the years, it'd become apparent she needed a teacher.

Ichigo looked at Hitomi-chan who was checking the status of something in the oven.

"_I'm surprised you didn't burn down anything."_ He expected the comment to earn him a punch to the gut or a wooden spoon to his head, but to his surprise Rukia continued smiling.

"_Plenty of time for that still, strawberry!"_ She dipped a finger into the bowl, took it out and in one cruel move, parted her lips. She proceeded to leisurely lick off the liquid chocolate while looking sultrily into Ichigo's eyes.

"_Oh! Look! Rukia-chan, they rose!" _

The welcomed news caused Rukia to abandon her torture and rush to Hitomi-chan's side to peek inside the oven. Both shared a satisfied smile at their achievement.

With a silent curse and a sigh, Ichigo resigned himself to postponing his payback.

"_How's it going squirt?" _

At the sound of her customary name, Hitomi-chan straightened up to properly look at him. She smiled and placed a hand over her eight-month old belly.

"_I'm ok. The baby's been kicking a lot today. I think she's happy that we're happy." _

Ichigo nodded. He resisted the temptation to put his hand on the girl's stomach, choosing instead to affectionately ruffle her hair. Hitomi-chan stood deadly still with a smile on her lips. Then, when Ichigo stopped, she hurried off to Rukia's side.

That night the three sat around the table eating three different kinds of desserts. Rukia made them a quick stir-fry for dinner and after, they shamelessly dug into the chocolate cake, strawberry bread and the first batch of walnut muffins that were deliciously spread out on the table. Time went by so seamlessly that when they began to smell smoke, Hitomi-chan couldn't believe she'd forgotten about the second batch of walnut muffins. When Ichigo emerged from the kitchen after having opened the window to air out the smoke, Hitomi-chan was sobbing in Rukia's arms.

The girl cried out apologies in between sobs while Rukia tenderly whispered comforting words to her. With a sigh, Ichigo walked closer, placed his large hand on the girl's head and assured her it was really just smoke. Minutes later, Hitomi-chan had stopped sobbing but appeared unwilling to leave the comfort of Rukia's proximity.

"_It's the hormones_" Rukia later dismissed as Ichigo helped her clean the kitchen.

"_I think it's more than that and you know it."_ He cleaned the counter with a wet cloth and recalled how Asakura-san had had to practically **tear** Hitomi-chan away from Rukia.

"_I don't know what you mean."_ But she did know, and he knew it by the strained tone in her voice.

"_She's way too attached to you. It's not normal."_

"_Give her a break Ichigo! She lost her mother a year ago and her lover soon afterward. She's lonely so of course she's going to latch on to someone!"_

"_This outgrew attachment months ago! The girl's practically a stalker Rukia!"_

"_Oh **you're** one to talk!" _

She pierced him with her eyes, her tone. In one heartbeat Ichigo understood. She **knew**. Knew about him sneaking out of the clinic to watch her at work, knew about the unspoken threats he made sure to convey to any male over the age of eleven and under age eighty that got near her. She knew about him activating the GPS tracker on her phone and perhaps about his newfound fascination with the curve of her left hipbone.

He stormed out of the kitchen more out of embarrassment than shame. Fourteen years, and she still outsmarted him every time. He didn't know whether he should apologize or confront the face of his infatuation with pride. Like a child, he hid away in the closet that housed the washing machine and fit himself with his back against the clean bed sheets Rukia kept there.

He was an idiot, that he was willing to admit. He felt threatened by a pregnant sixteen year old because she was spending more time with his 'wife' than he was. He was jealous, of a girl, of a very lonely, emotionally needy, eternal optimistic child that he couldn't even dislike.

Rukia was his. And she'd been entirely his for four years, no sharing, no doubting, nothing.

He was used to their blissful routine, their domestic dance of shared responsibilities and quality time, of their spontaneous sex life. But the sudden arrival of Hitomi-chan had not only diminished his quality time with Rukia, it had also forced some nicely dormant feelings out into the surface. Hitomi-chan had single headedly forced him to come out of 'wordly-emotional-detachment' and face the fact that he was still irreversibly, a protector by nature. He was still an older brother, was still a son and someone's friend. Kurosaki Ichigo was not quite as dead as he first thought he was, and Rukia **knew** it.

The reason he was angry at Hitomi-chan, he realized, was not because she was stalking Rukia, but because she was stalking his conscience.

He heard footsteps approach, he could make out Rukia's dainty socked feet on the old hardwood floor. She stopped right in front of the closet and slowly opened the creaking door. Ichigo looked up to meet his death goddess' all seeing eyes.

_Are you done sulking yet? _

Her eyes asked. She seemed thoroughly unimpressed and he suddenly wondered if this was how her students felt when she scolded them.

However he wasn't a child, and once he remembered that he was able to get on his feet and look at her from an angle he was more comfortable with. He exhaled, closed his eyes and leaned forward until his forehead rested on the crown of her head.

"_I'm sorry"_

It'd taken him years to learn when he had to apologize to her. She raised her hands to caress his jaw. She ducked her head to make him move and then looked up to reach his lips. A single kiss. He remembered a time when he used to spend entire nights giving her single, soul searing kisses in the hope of making her stay. Then another less pleasant memory surfaced, the kiss he gave her to stop her from telling him he should forget her.

It was in his nature to protect, in his nature to worry and care. But the only person who'd ever been able to protect **him** was the woman in his arms. Rukia would always be his infatuation but he also knew that as long as he had her, Kurosaki Ichigo would never die.

* * *

><p>April brought a constant uneasiness to the air. Hitomi-chan was in her last trimester and thus everyone around her was on their last nerve. Rukia would perform Olympic worthy gymnastics at the sound of their phone ringing, and Ichigo would unconsciously try to peek at the Asakura gate from his front porch every time he had the chance. The Asakuras weren't much better. At the end of March, Mrs Asakura confined Hitomi-chan to house arrest. The girl was only allowed to leave the house accompanied by someone and only to go as far as the Kuroki house or the medical clinic.<p>

"_Aren't they exaggerating with all this?"_ Ichigo asked as he handed a glass of water to the heavily pregnant girl. She was really a tiny thing, slim all over except for her nine month old stomach. She was having difficulties moving around, Ichigo thought it was a miracle the girl could still walk with a stomach the size of two watermelons.

"_Maybe, but they mean well. They're just trying to protect me and the baby... I'm grateful for that"_ She took a sip, set the glass down on a napkin and then smiled sweetly at him. He couldn't help but smile back.

"_Sure, so grateful you sneak away every chance you get to come see Rukia."_

She suddenly looked like a kid who'd just been caught with her hands in the candy jar. She grinned guiltily at him and Ichigo couldn't keep himself from ruffling the top of the girl's long raven hair.

Months ago, Hitomi-chan asked Rukia to be by her side during the birth. Ever since then, Rukia had set out to learn everything she could about what she called, 'human childbirth' and newborns. By April, his 'wife' had interviewed half the married women of the town, devoured dozens of baby books and even showed Hitomi-chan a video of an actual birth. He'd been concerned at first, surely this degree of devotion to someone else's baby was not natural. But then he remembered something he'd chosen to forget. Rukia had died at birth, she'd most likely never been close to a pregnant woman before Hitomi-chan, or seen a newborn baby. Perhaps Rukia was trying to learn more about herself and her origins through Hitomi-chan.

That is, until Kioshi-san, one of Rukia's coworkers opened her mouth.

"_Say, doesn't it feel like Rukia-chan is taking the role of the baby's father?" _

He'd laughed it off, but it bothered him. Maybe the whole baby thing was hitting too close to home. Maybe Rukia was really trying to be a part of something she'd never get to experience because her stupid gigai was unable to bear children. He'd thought about risking it and contacting Urahara to ask him if there was something he could do now to help them in that regard. But the old sandal-hat had made that crystal clear to them four years ago.

"_Rukia-san, as advanced as this new gigai is, it does not possess a functioning reproductive system. To this day the only gigai who's been able to produce children is Isshin's, and even then, sperm is easier to recreate than a womb." _

She'd accepted it without a second thought; they'd thanked him and hurried off into the darkness. He hadn't thought about it again until two years ago when he began watching Rukia play with the children. It was then that he started to think of babies as something more than crying, messy, wiggly things.

"_Ichigo-san! Give me your hand!"_ He immediately obeyed without realizing it. Before he knew it, Hitomi-chan was holding his hand against her swollen stomach. A kick, a very powerful kick was delivered perfectly to the palm of his hand.

"_She always moves more when I'm around Rukia-chan or you!" _

Another perfect kick and for the first time in his life, Ichigo felt his cheeks hurt from the force of his smile. It wasn't until he saw another much smaller and delicate hand cover his over the swell, that he realized Rukia was beside him, beaming, telling him _'I told you so'_ with her gaze.

On midnight of April sixteen, a phone call awakened the Kuroki couple. Hitomi-chan had gone into labour, weeks ahead of her due date and by the tone of Mr. Asakura's voice, Ichigo knew something was wrong.

They were dressed and out the door in three minutes, they arrived at the clinic red faced and panting eight minutes after that. Rukia immediately rushed to Hitomi-chan's side, Ichigo rushed to talk to Yashimora-sensei.

"_Gear up Ichigo_" One order told him everything he needed to know.

"_She can't deliver here! It's not going to be a normal birth and we don't have the equipment for a caesarean!"_

"_There's no time for a caesarean! The baby's coming now and she's going to haemorrhage."_

"_How can you know that?"_

"_Fifty years of experience boy, that's how! Listen to me, I already explained the situation to Hitomi-chan. There's no time to get her to the hospital, she'll have to risk it here. Whatever happens she wants us to save the baby." _

There was a strange ringing sound in Ichigo's head, he felt numb and for a second he wondered if he was in spirit form or inside his body. Then one surprisingly powerful hand grabbed his forearm.

"_Don't freeze up on me Ichigo! She needs you_!" Yashimora-sensei's hand was steady and strong, it snapped him out of the shock. In under a minute Ichigo was geared up and scrubbed. Rukia and Mrs. Asakura were both handed sterile robes and Ichigo tried to concentrate through the painful whimpers of the girl whom he'd grown to love like a sister.

Once the screams came, Mrs. Asakura ran out of the room in tears. Rukia held Hitomi-chan's hand, whispered soothing words, smoothed out the girl's dark hair. More screams, followed by sobs and Ichigo was ready to run out of the room himself. He searched for Rukia's violet eyes, expecting them to be as troubled as his soul, instead he found in them the endless source of strength he needed. She was calm, she was in control, she was grounded for both Hitomi-chan and him. He took the strength he needed from her and focused on Yashimora-sensei's orders through the girl's sobs.

The baby came sooner than anyone expected. In fact, as Yashimora-sensei would later admit to his wife, the newborn was halfway out before he realized it. The old doctor cut the umbilical cord and handed the newborn infant to Ichigo who hurried in cleaning her, before depositing her in Hitomi-chan's arms. She was a chubby little thing, cute even through the redness and slime. They watched Hitomi-chan receive her newborn daughter. Watched her kiss the infant's forehead, caress her darling little face, look at her as if trying find someone in her features and then in one colossal heartbeat, give the newborn to Rukia.

"_You're her mother now Rukia-chan. She's lucky because you'll love her for both of us, ne?"_

Ichigo saw Rukia's violet eyes widen and fill with tears before Yashimora-sensei's gutting verdict shut him off from the scene.

"_Ichigo she's haemorrhaging!" _

Ichigo knew nothing more as he and the elderly doctor fought to keep the girl from dying. He didn't see Rukia place the newborn in Hitomi-chan's arms, didn't see her push back strands of Hitomi-chan's hair and smile lovingly at the only girl she would always consider her one and only little sister. He didn't see Hitomi-chan whisper the newborn's name, smile through the pain and finally close her eyes.

"_It's too late, she's gone." _

The elderly doctor's tone was uncharacteristically heavy. He exhaled, shook his head and looked at Ichigo who was about to push through another round of meds. Always unwilling to give up.

"_She's gone son" _

Ichigo looked up from the lake of blood settling under his feet, to the sight of Rukia caressing Hitomi-chan's cold cheek while the newborn's hungry cries filled the room.

Pain blurs away time, it can either devour it whole or make it eternal. Ichigo didn't realize how long he'd spent cleaning blood off the floor until his legs cramped. He stood up, looked at the clean floor tiles, then at the bloodied towels inside a plastic bag ready to be incinerated. He could briefly recall that the coroner had already taken Hitomi-chan's body away. He didn't hear cries so he figured Rukia and Mrs. Asakura must have tended to the baby. He guessed Yashimora-sensei was busy somewhere filling out a cause of death report. He looked at the empty clinic bed, recalled Hitomi-chan's cries of pain. He suddenly needed to get out of there. He grabbed the plastic bag with the bloodied towels and rushed out the clinic through the back door. The incinerator was a good five minutes away, but the cool night air and awakening sky suited Ichigo just fine. It cleared his mind and helped soothe the pain in his heart. Hitomi-chan was gone, **really** gone. He'd felt her soul go off to Soul Society without hesitation, with calm content even. Shouldn't she have stayed behind a little longer? Stayed to make sure her daughter would be all right? Did she really believe in Rukia and him **that **much? He threw the bag inside, turned the incinerator on, closed the metal door and hurried back to the clinic, away from the smell that would soon surround the area.

He needed to see his wife.

He hurried over to the waiting room to find Rukia alone with a woman he had to think hard to recall. It was Mamora-san, the town's registry official and she looked like she'd just woken up less than an hour ago. Rukia held a well-wrapped bundle in her arms, and it took Ichigo a second to realize it was Hitomi-chan's daughter. Mamora-san appeared to be explaining something of great importance as she held out a ball point pen and some documents for Rukia to sign. He watched Rukia take the documents with one hand to glimpse over.

"_What's that?" _

The sound of his own voice surprised him. He sounded old and weary. It surprised Rukia too because her violet eyes widened when she realized he was coherent again. Relief flooded her features and Ichigo felt guilty once again for leaving her to deal with the hard aftermaths on her own.

"_It's the adoption paperwork. Mamora-san was kind enough to come all the way here to drop it off."_

"_Yes, and the sooner they're signed the better"_ The woman reaffirmed. Ichigo wondered just how much pressure from the town's **respectable** ladies it must have taken to get the registry official here before dawn.

"_What about the Asakuras?"_

"_Asakura-san said Hitomi-chan asked her that if anything went wrong with the delivery, she wanted __**us**__ to raise the baby."_ Rukia instinctively held the sleeping bundle closer to her chest in an attempt to alleviate the pain in her throat.

Ichigo looked at the bundle, then at Rukia, then at the paperwork. In one finite move, Ichigo took the papers from Rukia's hand, the pen from Mamora-san, and signed the paperwork to have the baby added to his family registry. Rukia signed next and soon after, Mamora-san walked relieved out the clinic, paperwork in hand.

Finally, Ichigo turned to look at Rukia. Her eyes full of something he hadn't seen in a while, pride. She was proud of him.

"_What's her name?" _

His voice sounded better, lighter. Rukia smiled and gazed down at the baby's sleeping face.

"_Yuria. Hitomi-chan named her Yuria" _

And out of the cloud of sorrow, Ichigo suddenly wanted to laugh.

* * *

><p>End notes:<p>

There will be another chapter.

Hopefully it was worth the read. I highly encourage long reviews but even short ones help me along.

Thanks for reading!

REVISED: January 2012- Because the mistakes in this chapter were REALLY pissing me off. Expect more changes once the last chapter is out.


	3. Chapter 3

Hello again! First of all,

I'm so, so, so, so sorry about how long this took!

Believe me, as much as I enjoyed writing this chapter, I bled it out. I have no children of my own to take from, so the entire beginning was a slow painful process of trying to come up with a lovable, cute yet kind of realistic portrayal of a child. Also, editing's a bitch and I wanted this to have some quality.

I tried to make sure this story did not turn into 'The Yuria Fanfic' instead I meant this to be a kind of window into their lives as parents. Also, please keep in mind that Yuria is a child brought up in a small Japanese town who also happens to like her parents.

Thank you to every single person who has reviewed, added this fanfic to their favourites or has taken the time to read it. It's thanks to you that this was finished. I hope to make you proud.

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach

As they say in Japan: Itadaki-masu

Part III

For a heartbeat, the sky tore open and the ground shook in fear. The sound awakened Rukia from a half-dead slumber. Instinctively, her hand moved to where the hilt of Sode no Shirayuki would have been, but stopped once she remembered she hadn't felt its hilt in nine years. She turned to look at her husband sleeping soundly beside her. The sky lit up again and she smiled at spotting the wrinkle he insisted he didn't have. He was still so painfully young compared to her, but his body disagreed.

She untangled her hand from the warmth of the comforter to run her fingers over the deep line nestled in between his eyebrows. The expert touch effectively loosened the tense muscles, releasing the scowl. She was convinced Ichigo would end up looking like a grumpy old man by the time he was forty. Even if in the town's eyes he looked incredibly young for his so-called Urahara made-up age.

She was pulling back her hand when the sound of the door sliding open assured her she was not the only one whose sleep had been disturbed. The sky lit up again, making a pair of bright blue eyes visible in the darkness. Tiny feet ran to the futon where Rukia was already holding up the comforter. She felt a little arm wrap around her waist while the ear of Usa-chan, the stuffed bunny tickled Rukia's chin. The little body snuggled closer until Rukia began running her fingers through the girl's long raven hair. Another lightning lit up the room, followed by the grumbling of thunder. A whimper and a little sob accompanied the sound.

"_Shh, Mommy's here."_

The little sobs stopped but every sound was accompanied by a fearful whimper. As Yuria's mother, Rukia knew a lot of things. She knew that eggs could only be served hard boiled because otherwise they were deemed 'yucky'. She knew that carrots just had to be part of every meal, and she knew that at least for now, daddy was considered entirely, heroically, super human.

Grabbing a tight hold of the munchkin attached to her torso, Rukia turned them over until the little girl was sandwiched in between her and Ichigo.

"_Shh, see? Mommy and Daddy will protect you." _

Bright blue eyes turned to see her father's sleeping face, then finally satisfied, she snuggled back under her mother's chin and allowed the warmth to lure her back to sleep.

Ichigo dreamt he was trapped in hell, bound by tongues of fire and asphyxiated by a weight. He awakened, agitated and out of breath to the sight of his captors. On his chest, he found his four year old daughter sleeping peacefully, one chubby cheek squashed right above his heart and her little arms hanging limp. Snuggled tightly against his side, Rukia slept soundly, her soft breath ticking his upper arm. Though overheated and out of breath, he dared not complain. Expert hands smoothed out Yuria's ruffled hair, and he realized to his amusement that Rukia was holding the stuffed Usa-chan to her chest. He vaguely recalled a thunderstorm the night before. Yuria must have crawled into bed with them the moment she heard the sound. It wasn't the first time she did this, but her endurance was building with every storm. Soon she'd be able to sleep through anything, hellfire included and there were times he wished he could just make her stop growing up so quickly. There was a time, not long ago, when he'd been able to put her to sleep on his chest for hours without feeling the weight. But she was four already, and although far from an adult she was already a child. He remembered how she used to howl from cold during her first few weeks of life. Remembered how he and Rukia had to place her in between them under a thick comforter to get her to sleep.

He gently traced the outline of the chubby cheek not pressed against his chest. She'd undergone a growth spurt in the last few months but her cheeks refused to un-plump. He was grateful for it since he thought she looked cuter like this. He felt Rukia stir beside him, saw her eyes open and take in her surroundings. Then he watched her lips break into a toothy smile at the sight of Yuria sleeping belly down on his chest.

"_Don't you look cute."_

He knew Rukia was torn between laughing or making a run for their camera. He was thankful she was still too drowsy to leave the warmth of the futon, there were already two photo albums filled with embarrassing pictures of him with Yuria, he didn't need any more.

"_She's getting heavy"_ He whispered.

Rukia raised a hand to trace the non-flattened cheek.

"_She's growing up"_

Ichigo envied the pride in her tone, envied the happiness Rukia derived from watching their daughter learn new things and become independent. He'd been horrified one morning a year ago, when he'd picked out Yuria's favourite yellow sweater for her to wear only to discover she could now do the buttons up "_all by myself daddy!_". He'd spent the entire day brooding in the most pathetic way and stealing glances at the baby pictures he kept of his daughter in his examination room.

"_Stop looking so devastated, you fool. She still has a long way to go before she leaves us."  
><em>She's said.

Ichigo grinned. He turned his head to meet Rukia's gaze, to find in her eyes the reassurance that no matter what happened, he would never be without her. He would never be alone. Ichigo was slowly coming to accept that the gift currently sleeping on his chest was a borrowed one. In the end, his little daughter belonged to the world and eventually, the day would arrive when he would have to give her back to the world. Until then, his plan was to thoroughly enjoy every squeal of "_Daddy!_" he could still get before the trying teenage years began.

Rukia leaned over to deliver a tender kiss on his dry lips before retreating from the comfort of their futon to make breakfast and bentos, leaving Ichigo alone to begin the time-consuming process of waking up the munchkin on his chest.

* * *

><p>Quick,<p>

Time passed by quickly in the human world. People aged, changed and even died quickly. Rukia had always known this, but she had never truly understood it until she was standing outside the preschool gates with her daughter for the last time. Yuria's right hand held on tightly to her mother's while her left hand waved goodbye to the preschool staff. There was a special earnestness in the wave today, just as there were tears in the eyes of all three teachers. Rukia's free hand held a yellow folder containing Yuria's completion certificate, proof that she would be officially starting primary school in just a month's time. It was a bittersweet occasion for the staff. After all, Yuria was the first child in the preschool's history to remain for a full five years.

Rukia remembered the first time she brought Yuria to work. Remembered the panic she felt at wondering how she could possibly manage to take care of the baby entrusted to her and all the other preschool children as well. But most of all, she remembered looking down at the month-old infant in her arms and having the weight of the world stripped from her shoulders.

Just one look, one hug, one call of "_Mommy!_" had the power to purge away all sadness from the world. But the knowledge that her little miracle would be leaving her sight beginning the following month brought the most terrible anxiety to her heart.

"_Mommy can we go visit Daddy?"_

The request distracted Rukia enough to pause the sentiment that was threatening tears.

"_But you just saw him not two hours ago!"_

In fact, both had spent the entire graduation ceremony choked up and holdings hands.

"_Yes but I want to show Sei-chan my certificate!"_

Ichigo would certainly not be pleased to hear his daughter's affections for the new doctor continued to grow, but Rukia found no need to tell him. She wished Yahsimora-sensei could have lived long enough to watch the baby he grew so fond of graduate preschool, but he'd passed away seven months ago, leaving Ichigo and Yashimora-sensei's estranged son Seiya to run the clinic.

"_All right, we'll stop by, but only for a few minutes. They're both very busy and we want Daddy to be home for dinner." _

Yuria nodded, her beaming smile unfaltering. She was proud of her achievement and excited to experience the wonders of first grade. However, she was yet to entirely realize the change of school would mean her mother would no longer be just a room away. Eventually the realization would weigh heavily in her mind, but for now she was all smiles as she walked down the very familiar road to her Daddy's clinic.

"_Mommy, race me to the door?" _

Rukia stopped mid-step to look down at pleading blue eyes. Finally, she sighed in resignation.

"_All right but just to the door" _

The little girl cheered and quickly placed herself into racing position. Her eyes focused on the side of the empty road knowing that not too far from here, her Daddy awaited.

"_At three!"_

"_Mommy, I know!"_

"_One, two... three!"_

Rukia made a show of outrunning her by a few paces before slowing down near the end. She watched Yuria's little legs carry her closer and closer to the clinic. Watched the light pink skirt of her favourite dress flutter behind her and heard Yuria's happy cry at realizing she'd won the race. It was these precious instants that pained Rukia the most. The ones she knew were priceless but fleeting.

"_Mommy, **hurry up**!"_

Rukia chuckled away her melancholy and finally ran full speed to the clinic door.

* * *

><p>Over the course of seven years, Rukia had grown accustomed to being woken up at all hours of the night. Cries ofhunger, monsters under the bed, nightmares and thunder storms were all common culprits. However there was another, much older wake-up call that she preferred much more: the grope. It began slowly, just a butterfly touch over the soft skin of her abdomen before travelling up to knead perky breasts. That particular wake-up call belonged to the days when she and Ichigo could stay in bed all night and day having marathon worthy sex. Nowadays it was especially reserved for once a month when Yuria went over to 'Granny' and 'Grandpa' Asakura's house for a sleepover. Only then could Ichigo and Rukia enjoy old sensual games without the constant threat of little feet running into the room. This Saturday dawn was no exception.<p>

Ichigo took his time running his fingers over Rukia's skin, tickling her softly into consciousness. Once he knew she was properly awake, he kissed her neck and slid his hand lower, slipping it underneath her parties. He heard her whimper in pleasure and watched one of her small, graceful hands first over her mouth to muffle the sound. He smiled and with his free hand, removed the offending hand. Tonight they had all the time in the world and there were no little ears to worry about. Gently turning her face toward him, he licked her bottom lip and leaned in to taste her mouth. He felt her gasp and shake with every movement of his fingers deep within her. Felt her come undone with one last stroke. Kurosaki Ichigo was a man who'd tasted the highest levels of raw power, yet nothing had ever made him feel quite as powerful as watching his ever strong, wilful, beautiful Rukia shatter with his skilled fingers alone.

Ichigo released her mouth to let her catch her breath. He felt the rise and fall of her chest and smiled at the sensation of his soaked digits. He missed taking his time with Rukia, but he was certainly grateful for the quickies they were able to sneak in during the week. He was beginning to relax when he felt himself being pinned to the bed. He tried to move his arms only to realize his little cheater had used a kido binding spell. He watched Rukia calmly rise from the futon, remove her clothes and move the comforter to the side before moving to stand naked over him. He tried to move his arms, tried to snap the spell the same way he had done on the night he met her, but she too had gotten better. He looked up at her, only to realize the first light of dawn was shining over her face, lighting her violet eyes with something he truly wanted to be a part of. He surrendered while looking up at her face, knowing fully well it was going to be a wonderful day.

They ate breakfast at noon in their underwear, an old habit they hadn't dared try since Yuria was born. Worse yet, the moment they sat down to eat Ichigo pulled Rukia down onto his lap and kept her there until they made love like that. Once exhausted and spent, Rukia simply laid down on top of Ichigo and slowly allowed the real world back into their minds.

"_Do you think she's all right?"_ He watched Rukia fold her hands over his collarbone and rest her chin over them. Ever the vigilant mother, Ichigo was hardly surprised to hear the question. As much as Rukia teased him about being an overprotective father, they both knew she was just as bad herself.

"_The shrine is just an hour away. They probably have all the kids helping out in the garden right now." _

Ichigo buried a hand in her hair and leisurely combed through the long strands. Every year Rukia threatened to cut it and every year he managed to save it. It was important to him although he himself didn't understand why.

"_They don't come back until Sunday morning and we don't have work until Monday. Is there anything you want to do?" _

It was the first time in seven years they had an opportunity like this. Usually Ichigo had to work half day at the clinic on Saturday and the Asakuras returned their little bundle of energy by Sunday afternoon. But this time the trip to the shrine had given them the opportunity for a vacation alone. The last thing Ichigo wanted to do was set a foot outside the house.

"_I want you naked until tomorrow."_

Rukia grinned and languidly pressed the length of her body against him, immediately causing the desired reaction. She whispered her answer on his swollen lips.

"_Count on it."_

* * *

><p>She was good with her hands.<p>

Ichigo knew that already, yet still he stood transfixed watching her hands carefully peel off cardboard cut appliqués from the wall. Weeks ago she'd asked Yuria what colour she'd like her new room painted in. The girl had requested white walls with bunnies and bears. Rukia was thrilled, Ichigo swore off genetics.

Ever since then, Rukia had spent whatever free time she had making the cardboard cut-outs. To ensure quality, she'd said, but also because painting them all would simply take too long. The new furniture was all ready to be moved up, a work desk for doing homework, a bed instead of a futon and even an old little coffee table that Ichigo fixed up for Yuria to entertain friends, girl friends, of course.

Ichigo and Asakura-san had been discussing adding another room to the small house for years, but it wasn't until Yuria turned eight that finances and opportunity met. It was their landlady who came up with the idea of building **up**. Because Yuria liked to stargaze, she'd said and Ichigo swallowed the explanation that it was actually Rukia who liked it. Yuria only joined in to listen to all the stories her mother made up about the stars.

But Yuria wasn't the only one excited about the new addition. Both Ichigo and Rukia felt giddy at the prospect of being able to make love without minding the slightest bit of movement from the small room just a wall away. Though a godsend for many years, the room next to theirs was really a storage area and Yuria was rapidly outgrowing it.

"_I think you missed the bunny's ear."_

She looked over her work and frowned in the cute way Ichigo liked.

"_That's a bear, baka." _

He swallowed the snort simply because he'd learned to beware her paybacks. Sometimes he missed the days when he was able to infuriate her without fearing for his sex life.

"_When do you think we'll be able to move the furniture?"_

"_This is almost dry, so before dinner if you want."_

"_Sounds good, I'll go call Seiya. He'll come if I mention free beer."_

"_Then you better go buy some because we're all out."_

Ichigo pressed his forehead against the door frame and groaned. This would be the fifth beer/sake run of the week but alcohol, it seemed, was the most well accepted form of favour payment.

"_At least if everything goes well, Yuria can start sleeping up here tonight."_

"_You sure are in a rush."_

He drank the teasing twinkle in her eyes, the unspoken impatience.

"_So are you"_

They shared a knowing smile, accomplices in love.

"_Call Seiya, then get the beer. I'll start on dinner as soon as I'm done here."_

"_Aye, aye" _

He followed the instructions to the letter and it wasn't until he was on his way to the convenience store that it occurred to him he didn't need to. He could have asked Seiya to pick up the beer on the way and given him the money later. Or he could have gone to get the beer and then called Seiya to give the paint more time to dry. But he didn't, and he didn't want to. He'd started following Rukia's orders without question after they moved into the house, back when he'd spent days in a sort of haze that would only dissipate with Rukia's presence. She'd been the one to keep her head together, for although he'd spoken so strongly about running away and only needing her, once they were finally safe he was the one who broke to pieces.

He'd felt so betrayed, so abandoned, so bitter. He'd clung to Rukia like a leech clinging to a piece of flesh. He'd sucked her life force shamelessly and she'd indulged him without asking for anything in return. Back on that first year it was her orders that kept his sane.

'_Go talk to Asakura-san about the broken door.'  
>'Put that bag there.'<br>'Go take a bath.'  
>'Go get milk.'<br>'Go talk to Yashimnora-sensei about helping him at the clinic.'  
>'Come eat.' <em>

She'd forced him to abandon his self-pity and re-enter the real world. But then again, how much could this isolated, mountain town compare to the hustle and bustle of Karakura? How much could these simple, community-centred inhabitants compare to the self-centred people that inhabited his home town? Ichigo stopped walking, he shut his eyes and focused on getting his emotions under control.

"_Breathe Ichigo, just breathe. Calm down... I'm right here"_

He focused on the memory of Rukia's cool hands running over his shoulders, resting on the back of his neck. Her mouth whispering in his ear, her voice coaching him softly. She never mentioned how broken he was, never complained. Her orders kept him together. Her arms wrapped impossible tight around him kept him alive.

Slowly he calmed the untameable emotions. The ones that were always there, just beneath the surface, always willing to come out. He liked to blame them on his Hollow but deep down he knew it wasn't that easy.

Crisis averted, Ichigo continued on his way. By the time he was walking back, carrying bags full of beers he'd resolved that he would make sure to have Yuria entirely settled into her new room and have drunk Seiya out before midnight so he could make love to his wife.

* * *

><p>Discipline was definitely not Ichigo's strong point.<p>

It took only the sight of teary blue eyes to turn him into an immediate sap. Perhaps it was because of how rarely his sweet little girl did something worthy of punishment, but whenever she came to him crying because Mommy had prohibited TV for the day, he couldn't help but want to remove the cause of her tears. Still, he held on strong, for his daughter, for Rukia and for the future of Japan. Thankfully, Rukia was not an avid punisher and to his early surprise, she was strongly against any form of corporal punishment.

It always managed to surprise him how Yuria could be sobbing in his shoulder about how mean Mommy was one moment, only to have her kissing and hugging Rukia an hour later. Eventually by the time Yuria was seven years old she was one of the best behaved children in her class regardless of her strong willed character. However, there was one instance when Yuria was ten years old that challenged both Ichigo and Rukia's patience.

It was a Wednesday morning when Ichigo received a call at the clinic from Yuria's school. They informed him that his daughter had not arrived to class that morning. He'd forgotten what true, raw fear felt like until then. Forgotten what it was like for his heart to beat desperately and his hands to grow cold. His only hope was learning she wasn't the only one missing, eight other children had also not arrived.

He immediately phoned Rukia at work and together they rushed to the school to meet with the other parents. They sat in a room with twenty other adults for an hour trying to figure out what had happened that morning. Eventually, they ended up taking to the streets in search of the children. He knew there were no Hollows in the area because he could feel none and soon parents' accounts revealed some potential trouble makers in the missing bunch. Could his daughter have been coerced to follow some delinquents somewhere?

For two hours parents ran from street to street in search of the children, they called out names, asked neighbours and deployed a group of volunteers to look for them. It was on the road out of town that Ichigo's group spotted four children walking up a street in their school uniforms, one of them was Yuria.

She looked fine, her school uniform was in order and she looked terribly relieved to see him. But Ichigo couldn't see that, the relief he felt banished quickly and got replaced by anger. By the time she was in front of him something had possessed his hand. He struck her cheek, not hard enough to bruise but hard enough to sting. He watched her bright blue eyes fill with tears but instead of looking down like he expected her to do, she looked him straight in the eyes with a look that said she'd done nothing to deserve shame.

He remained frozen in place, horrified with himself until Yuria wiped her tears and walked past him. Ichigo followed the group in a daze. A whistle was sound, signalling children had been found and soon all the groups reconvened at the meeting place. Ichigo saw Rukia running full speed toward them, he saw her let out a sound of relief at seeing her daughter safe and sound and then watched her pull Yuria right into her arms. He heard Yuria sobbing in her mother's arms and part of him wondered if she'd ever be able to forgive him. They hugged for a long time and even when a neighbour told Rukia they had to ask Yuria some questions, she still didn't let the girl go far.

"_It was all my fault! Please don't punish the others!"_ Angry eyes fell upon Manori, Yuria's best friend since first grade. Then the girl burst into hysterical tears and covered her face.

"_No! They taunted me and I was stupid enough to fall for it!"_ Rukia looked at Hikaru with surprise. She remembered the way he used to hide behind her whenever an older kid was mean to him in the playground. He used to look up at her and say she was the nicest teacher he'd ever had, even at age four.

"_It wasn't __**our**__ fault at all! We just got dragged into this! At least we had the brain to turn back!"_ Hiro, the son of the local pharmacist looked almost offended by the treatment they were receiving, but it was his mother who was quick to latch on to his ear.

Rukia felt her daughter press closer to her side and immediately she knew something was not right.

"_Yuria?"_ With brow furrowed and teary blue eyes, she looked pleadingly at her mother.

"_I'm so sorry I made you and Daddy worry. I just needed to make sure everyone would be all right."_

Manori sobbed loudly in response but it was little angry Hiro who explained everything. That very same morning, three renowned trouble makers had come up with the idea of journeying to the nearest town with a movie theatre, to watch some highly anticipated premier. One of the plan's masterminds happened to be the boy Manori liked, and when the boy invited Manori to join in, she'd asked Yuria to go with her. Deeply concerned for her friend's lapse of judgement Yuria tried to convince Manori not to go. But in the process she was overheard by Hiro, who thought it an interesting idea and who then told Hikaru. In the end, Yuria and Hikaru had gone along merely to try to convince everyone to turn back.

"_Where are the others?"_ It was evident by the police chief's tone that there would be blood to pay for the mischief.

"_Probably still walking. They had a good two hours to go on foot before we turned back. We're sorry we worried everyone."_ Hikaru's mother placed a hand on her son's shoulder. The woman smiled at Rukia who in turn, nodded in understanding.

"_It seems to us, our children were victims of circumstance. They went along with the plan only to protect their friends and in the end they convinced others to turn back, so they should be excepted from punishment." _

"_What Harashi-san means,"_ Rukia amended _"Is that although the children did wrong, they had their friends' best interest at heart. And at the end both Manori-chan and Hiro-kun did what was right and turned back the moment they realized their wrongdoing. Now, I'm sure these children will receive a severe scolding at home, but I doubt there's a need to establish a public punishment."_

Rukia's phrasing seemed to please both the Chief of Police and the school Principal for they nodded in understanding and agreed that the four children would not face public charges for misbehaviour. As for the remaining missing children, two police cars were deployed to look for them and everyone was gratefully sent home.

For the Kurokis, the walk home was a quiet one. Rukia kept hold of Yuria's hand and Ichigo walked lifelessly beside his wife. There were no reproaches, no yelling, just silence. Once home, Rukia asked for Yuria's help in making dinner and Ichigo sat out on the porch letting his guilt consume him.

He bore guilt well. He had considerable experience with it after all. But this guilt, he found, was different from what he was accustomed to. He was terrified that he'd severed something precious between him and his daughter. Part of him, the part that wore Rukia's voice of reason, told him he was being ridiculous, that all he had to do was talk to his daughter and apologize. But the other part disagreed, the other part told him she'd never forgive him.

By the time Rukia called him inside for dinner, he was relieved to find Yuria talking more although she still refused to meet his gaze. Over dinner, she told them exactly what had happened and how far they've gotten before she and Hikaru finally convinced the other two to turn back. Finally, after the girl had consumed at least half her body weight in food, Rukia suggested she go take a shower.

"_And Yuria?"_

"_Yes Mamma?"_

"_Make sure you stop by Hitomi-Mamma's portrait and apologize to her too."_

In response Yuria gave them a very familiar guilty grin before hurrying off to her room.

"_It's a little strange to make her apologize to a picture." _

Ichigo kept his gaze fixed on his plate, one chopstick poking at a cold piece of beef. His evasiveness amused her because it was rare for his natural straightforward character.

"_You never thought so when we used to make her say goodnight to Hiotmi-chan's portrait every night."_ She maintained an even tone, knowing part of him was trying to annoy her.

"_She was younger then."_

Back then, they'd stand before Hitomi-chan's portrait in the living room, bow and say goodnight together as part of the daily ritual. Eventually Yuria continued to do so on her own, as a reminder that she had two loving mothers. He'd always encouraged it.

"_She's still a child Ichigo. A mature child for her age, but a child nonetheless."_

"_I know... did... did she tell you what happened?"_

"_You mean that you slapped her?"_

Ichigo was startled to silence by Rukia's forwardness. His widened eyes looked at her guiltily.

"_She thinks she disappointed you. She's terrified you'll love her less now, so you better have a talk with her before she goes to sleep."_

He sighed, relieved to find his loving daughter still too young to hold grudges.

"_I'll apologize to her."_

"_Good... there's something else..."_

He braced for what he knew he deserved. For although Yuria would let him get away with an apology and a hug, his loving wife never would. Then again, he expected no less from the voice of his conscience.

"_Do you know why I've never, ever, hit her Ichigo?"_

Even though he knew she wasn't really asking, he answered anyway in the dim hope of derailing the speech that was sure to make him feel worse.

"_Because you're a good mother?" _

Both knew it wasn't intended as a compliment and the look she gave him promptly shut up his smartass mouth.

"_I spent my entire childhood in Soul Society getting beaten, kicked and slapped around for doing what I needed to do to survive. I know how it feels to have so many bruises you can't sleep at night..."_ She stopped, her gaze going over the empty plates as if trying to separate the emotions. _"When Hitomi-chan gave us Yuria I promised her that I would be the best mother I could be. You and I chose not to discipline her with violence because we wanted to do right by Yuria. We wanted to raise her with love, that's the path we chose Ichigo." _

Ichigo stared deeply into his wife's violet eyes without saying a word. He knew her so well. He knew she liked to put cinnamon in hot chocolate, and that she sometimes wrote letters to her brother knowing he would never know of them. He even knew just the right way of making her climax in the most satisfying way. He'd learned to read her expressions at the age of fifteen, and prided himself in knowing what she was thinking. Yet even after all that, she was somehow still an utter mystery to him. Someday, he thought, he would learn everything there was to know about her, but for today he was simply happy knowing what she meant.

"_You're saying I'm a better parent than that."_

"_I'm saying all parents make mistakes, but you can't forget how we chose to raise her."_

He'd been so scared of being a father, terrified in fact. Most men had months to get accustomed to the idea, he'd gotten minutes. He distinctly remembered the first time he was alone in the house with Yuria. She'd been just a few days old. Rukia had gone to get something and he'd been left alone, in the middle of the living room, staring into the infant's baby blue eyes and wondering how the hell he was going to be a father to the most perfect little being.

What if he dropped her?

What if he did something wrong?

What if she ended up hating him?

What if he couldn't protect her?

The more he thought about it the more he panicked until finally something made him look up. There, leaning on the door frame he found Rukia, grocery bag in hand and looking at him with such **love**.

"_We're going to be just fine Ichigo."_ She'd said, and he'd believed her because she was completely sure of it.

Ten years later he still needed her constant reassurance to get by. As a boy, she'd kept him from drowning in guilt and self-pity, as a man she'd kept him from losing himself. It still scared him at times, knowing that as strong as he was, his soul would never be able to live a day without her.

"_I'll go talk to Yuria now."_

Pink lips broke into a lovely smile and Ichigo couldn't hold back from matching it. A big part of him wanted nothing less than to ravage her mouth but he knew that would have to wait until he'd earned it. He was almost out the door when he heard Rukia's last 'suggestion'.

"_Oh, and Ichigo? You better apologize to Hitomi-chan on the way."_

He found it satisfying that Rukia didn't see him smirk.

* * *

><p>Rukia liked to collect things.<p>

Little things, like Yuria's old drawings and notes Ichigo had written to her long ago. She kept these things in boxes that were neatly stacked in a storage closet. Other things, such as her Chappy plushies and other cute items were kept on display around the house, such was the treaty agreed upon over a decade ago. Said treaty stated that no fluffy stuffed animals were allowed in their bedroom, but it allowed Rukia free reign in displaying them anywhere else. Which was why there were three Chappy plushies in the living room and a pink turtle in the kitchen. Eventually, Ichigo grew accustomed enough to ignore the peculiar cuteness of the articles, all except for one: a limited edition Chappy doll wearing a black haori. That particular one was kept on a corner of the living room atop the book shelf, taunting Ichigo with its cheery, overconfident eyes from up high. He hated that doll, not because of its appearance, but because of who had given it to Rukia and what it represented.

It was during his second year of University as he was studying for exams that Renji showed up at his window. To his surprise, the all mighty Abarai Renji admitted to being a complete nervous wreck because he had just received permission from Byakuya to formally begin dating Rukia. Apparently the Vice-Captain had recently gathered enough courage to speak to his Captain about his romantic feelings toward his childhood friend. And after considerable deliberation, Byakuya had finally accepted.

For an hour, Ichigo listened to Renji ramble on about his hopes and insecurities. All the while thinking of how just eight hours prior he'd had Rukia's naked body firmly against his. He thought of the sensuous curve of her hip, and how just the week before she's taught him how to make love in spirit form. He tried to concentrate on how it had felt to have her riatsu within him and her lips against his. He listened to Renji in a daze and was eternally grateful when instead of asking for his opinion, the Vice-Captain simply left in a hopeful stupor, claiming Ichigo had helped him a lot and that he was going to talk to Rukia right away.

Ichigo didn't touch his textbooks again that day. Instead, he slowly worked through the shock he'd just received. He'd always suspected Renji harboured romantic feelings for Rukia, but he'd never expected Renji to ask for Byakuya's permission to date his sister before even confessing to her. Also, what would she say? Would she let him down lightly? Would she yell?

Then a much nastier train of thought scared away any hope of sleep: what if she said yes? What if she realized that openly going out with Renji was better than sneaking around with him? What if he lost her?

Anxiety choked his lungs and turned his stomach. He needed to see Rukia. Needed to know what Renji had said and what she'd answered. He needed to find her and convince her that he needed her more, that he deserved her more. That he was a better man and loved her more than Renji ever could. Ichigo launched to his feet in search of his Shinigami badge only to find himself nearly running Rukia over.

His surprised eyes swallowed her whole and when she opened her mouth to reprimand his clumsiness, he immediately crushed her lips against his.

She didn't stop him, instead she slipped her arms around his neck and used the leverage to pull him closer. Eventually they fell onto the bed, Ichigo's large frame covering her small body. He didn't stop kissing her till he realized that no matter how naked he got her, he couldn't do a damn thing to her unless he went into spirit form too. Reluctantly, he forced himself to still his wandering hands and tear his mouth away from hers. He took her in, her messy hair, her pale lips, the clouded look in her eyes. He never wanted to lose any of it, not even to someone like Renji.

He pushed himself off her, but kept a strong hold on her waist which he used to place her beside him on the pillow. They lay on their side, facing each other the way they'd done after the first time they made out. He wanted to wait for her to tell him on her own, but after the first minute of silence it became obvious that waiting patiently was simply too much to ask from him.

"_Renji came by this morning"_ He began.

He was sorry to watch her jerk awake from her sedated state. She looked away, her brows furrowed.

"_Did he tell you?"_

Her tone gave him hope, reassurance even. She sounded hurt.

"_Yeah."_

"_Can you believe he talked to Nii-sama before coming to me first?"_

For the first time since Renji's visit Ichigo felt like breathing again. He was so relieved he allowed his guard to drop.

"_Byakuya's his Captain_" He reasoned.

"_We're childhood friends!... we're __**friends**__... he's nakama"_ The sadness in her tone told Ichigo how sorry she was to have broken his heart. But something about her words awakened a need to know.

"_We were friends too, nakama even"_

The way her gaze fixed on him made him fear he'd said something terribly wrong. Their relationship was still so new, so taboo, he felt like it could slip from his fingers at any moment.

"_We still are Ichigo. But now we're lovers too."_

"_How's it different?"_

She understood the question because of the insecurity in his eyes. He wanted to know what separated him from Renji in her heart. Needed to know how safe he was, how irreplaceable. She understood she needed to come clean.

"_It's always been different with you, from the very beginning. Don't you feel it?" _

She took his hand still resting on her hip and placed it right on her chest. He felt the outline of a soft breast, imagined her heartbeat.

He had felt it, even before she plunged her Zanpakuto into him. He'd been drawn to her and even at age fifteen his teenaged heart had recognized the connection. He'd watched her slay a hollow, suspended in the air with the grace of a butterfly. He'd been thinking about her when she first appeared in his bedroom believing he couldn't see her. Even when he'd considered her a friend, she was still different to him from any other friend, so precious, more trustworthy.

"_You're mine Rukia."_

It was the first time he said it outside the throws of passion, somehow it sounded more intimate now than ever before.

"_You're mine too Ichigo." _

He was learning she always whispered her feelings. He found it endearing. He brought his hand up to caress the side of her face. It traced over a pale cheek and pushed back the strands of her hair. He loved her like a fool, and he was all right with that. His anxiety appeased, he leaned in for a long kiss. They spent the rest of the night alternating between kisses and adoring looks.

It wasn't until daybreak, when Ichigo had to go to the bathroom that they moved. He came back to his room to find her holding a small size bunny plushie wearing a black robe, she looked at it tenderly.

"_New toy?" _

"_Renji gave it to me after I turned him down."_

Ichigo suppressed the impulse to throw the chappy out the window. He neared Rukia slowly, carefully studying her expressions. It was with a start that he realized she was in the brink of tears. She was suppressing them with a tightly pained smile.

"_Are you sorry you turned him down?"_

She forgave his ridiculous, selfish immaturity only because she reminded herself of how young he truly still was.

"_I'm sorry I hurt him"_

Her tone told him she was annoyed at him; at his lack of sensitivity, his insecurity. But love was still so new to him. Intimacy, newer still and the fear of losing her was maddening. He exhaled, drowned his jealousy, committed himself to acting like a decent lover and stepped closer to Rukia. He placed a hand on her waist, feeling the softness of the white under robe against his fingers. He gently tried pulling her toward his chest, and finding no resistance he firmly engulfed her in his arms.

"_He'll get over it Rukia. He won't let this affect your friendship. You've know each other too long... just give him time."_

He felt her relax in his arms, saw her nod gently and felt her press her ear against his heart.

A month later, Renji was entirely superficially over it. He treated Rukia the same as always, joked with her, fought with her, but the longing would always be there, just beneath the surface. A year later, Ichigo wouldn't be able to deny the look of betrayal in Renji's eyes at finding out just how long he and Rukia had been in a relationship for. He'd look at Ichigo like a cheated husband and Ichigo would question his right to feel betrayed. However, what Ichigo would remember most was Renji's refusal to help him in the end. The hate and pain in the red head's eyes as Ichigo begged him to keep Rukia from being imprisoned once again for nothing better than as filthy blackmail to keep the substitute Shinigami in line.

That was the day Ichigo learned just how short lived heroes really are. He remembered a time when he'd been hailed by the Gotei 13 Captains and Yamamoto alike for having changed soul society for the better. Yet he'd been cornered like an animal and coerced to fall in line like a good dog just three years later. It still made his blood boil.

He'd bled for them.

Fought for them.

For what?

"_Daddy have you seen my math textbook?"_

He thought back to the night before when he'd come home to find her scribbling down equations with the setting sun. She liked doing her math homework outside; she claimed she was compromising.

"_I think it's still on the porch! Check the chair!" _

He watched his daughter run past him to the door; she was dressed in her junior high uniform, her long black hair swaying with the movement.

"_Found it! Mom, Dad I'm off! See you later!" _

He yelled out a reply, but doubted it heard as the the sound of running feet reached him. He could hear Rukia in the kitchen, they'd have to leave for work soon or be late. He looked down at his forgotten coffee, long cold. Rukia had kept the plushie. She'd kept the token of Renji's love for her, even brought it all the way to their little cabin house up in the mountains. But that wasn't what bothered him, not anymore. He knew Rukia kept it because it reminded her of the old Renji. The Renji she grew up with, the one she laughed with. It was symbol of her childhood and she had so few he dared not deny it to her.

It bothered him because it reminded him of the last time he saw Renji. Reminded him of a time when he'd felt so betrayed he'd actually considered knocking Soul Society down a peg or two. He'd come so painfully close to it. He had the power, everyone was paralysed by his Riatsu. He could have easily caused so much damage, but it was Rukia who kept him grounded. It was her weight in his arms after he took her from her cell down at the barracks, that reminded him of who he was. He was the man she had fallen in love with, and he had no intention of changing that.

"_Ichigo hurry up, we're going to be late! You didn't even drink your coffee! Just leave it, here's your bento."_

He took her in, her unchanging fiery eyes, her slowly aging face. She'd call him an idiot if he confessed the thoughts that had consumed his breakfast. She'd tell him he never would have destroyed Soul Society no matter how angry he'd been and to stop living in the past. She'd tell him she kept the plushie because it was too cute to throw away and that they were going to be late for work. But he knew all this, because he knew her. So instead he got on his feet, took his bento from her hand and planted an open-mouth kiss on her lips that left her breathless.

* * *

><p>News spread fast in the small town.<p>

Everything from marital quarrels, family scandals to even the news of neighbouring towns were sure to set phone lines afire. For many years now, and much to Ichigo's grief, the medical clinic's waiting room had become the town's best hot spot for gossip. Elderly patients coming in for checkups would show up early to their appointments in hopes of catching the hottest rumours. In an attempt to decrease this habit, the clinic's doctors Ichigo and Seiya agreed to put a tv in the waiting room showing only news. Although the tactic proved futile, it did at least increase the quality of the gossip to more, national important matters.

One Thursday afternoon, Seiya-sensei stepped into the waiting room, chart in hand to call on his next patient only to find a good twenty odd people crowded into the small room earnestly listening to the news. It appeared a murder had occurred in the area, barely just one town over. It was such a rare occurrence that people had walked in from the street to listen to the tv report. A crime of passion, they said. Wife's lover kills the husband and dumps him in the woods before running away with the man's wife.

Seiya Yashimora, a good looking and charming man to his own right, was efficient in kicking out non-patients in a most cordial manner. Once assured most of the visitors wouldn't return to catch more grisly details, he asked his next patient to wait in his office and proceeded to knock on Kuroki-sensei's door to convey the latest bit of gossip to hit their small town.

It wasn't until after dinner, when Yuria had gone back to her room to finish the rest of her homework, that Ichigo felt free to discuss it with Rukia.

"_It explains the uneasy feeling I've had since Tuesday."_

He was leaning against the side of the fridge, arms crossed and voice low. Even now, if he stilled his mind enough and went outside he could feel the faint riatsu of a hollow.

"_Then he's had about forty-eight hours to go through the hollowification process."_

Rukia was sitting on the kitchen counter, her eyebrows furrowed in concentration. The hollow was still too far away for her to detect but she trusted Ichigo's instincts. Once a full hollow it would attack the nearest town first, perhaps in search of the wife and friend who betrayed him. With no Shinigami it'd be a bloodbath.

"_That means he's almost ready to start hunting. I gotta look for him, before he kills anyone."_

"_You can't go"_ She stated it so plainly that Ichigo's eyes went aflame.

"_The moment you use any of your attacks Soul Society will detect our location and come looking for us."_

A sudden chill ran up his spine as he realized they were caught between a landslide and deep water.

"_We don't know that"_

"_You've never been good at controlling your riatsu Ichigo. Especially now, with your spiritual powers being what they are. The moment you go into spirit form there will be a big enough surge to set off any tracker."_

He ran a hand through his orange hair and exhaled, exasperated.

"_Then what do you propose I do?" _

"_I go, you stay_"

He wasn't amused.

"_Are you crazy?"_

"_I'll hide my riatsu and slay the hollow"_

She was determined, he could tell by her gaze.

"_How do you know your riatsu won't be detected too?"_

An old familiar panic was setting in the pit of his stomach.

"_Even if it is, at least mine's not the size of Tokyo!" _

Gazes met in a furious struggle of wills. He wanted to yell at her, tell her it was too dangerous but he couldn't raise his voice, Yuria was right upstairs.

"_Let's go outside"_

He didn't wait for her, instead he took hold of her arm and 'led' her outside. He heard her hiss in pain from his grip but didn't let go until they were safely hidden in the back bushes and he had her cornered against the trunk of a tree.

"_If you think I'm going to let you face that hollow all by yourself, you've completely lost your fucking mind Rukia!"_

"_Don't you dare treat me like a novice Ichigo! I was a squad lieutenant! And I've been slaying Hollows for __**much**__ longer than you!"_

The stinging on her arm fuelled the fire in her eyes and it was Ichigo who took a step back.

"_Is there a chance Soul Society might send anyone to slay it by tomorrow?"_

"_No. Unless there's a Shinigami close by, no tracker will pick up a Hollow signal this secluded until it's killed someone."_

He slammed his fist against the tree bark, a foot above Rukia's head. He'd spent years picking up Soul Society's messes, from rogue Captains to rogue ex-members it just never seemed to stop. Even now he had to deal with its inability to protect common people from the greatest of supernatural dangers.

It was just so fucking unfair.

"_I can't let you go on your own Rukia"_

She knew that tone. She recognized it from the days when he used to crush her against his chest to keep her from leaving his room. It was what most revealed how much he loved her.

She felt guilty for liking it again.

"_Ichigo, I'll be fine. It's just a basic Hollow" _

But she knew the dangers just as well as he did. There was no Inoue to heal her wounds after all. And there was no telling just how big or powerful this Hollow could be.

"_I can't lose you Rukia"_

The confession stripped away her anger. She savoured the passion behind his tone, dared to place a hand over his furiously beating heart. He used to be so unwavering. He was the one who plunged first and thought later, the cocky overconfident fool who feared nothing. But no, he was still like that. When it came to protecting those he cared about Ichigo had not changed. But it was different when it came to her. In her heart she knew that if it came down to either saving her or a town, he'd choose her. After all, he'd done it before. He'd chosen her over everything before. Finally, she tried her trump card.

"_Think of Yuria. She needs a parent_."

She watched him shut his eyes.

"_What she needs are __**both**__ her parents." _

He brought a hand to cup her cheek, made her look up into his eyes.

"_Like it or not, we're in this together Rukia. I'm going with you, riatsu be damned."_

His thumb made circles over her cheek, calming her with the touch. He circled her waist with his other hand and brought her closer to him.

"_I dare that old bastard to come after us. I'll hit him with everything I've got."_

"_Ichi-" _

He kissed with force he rarely used. He pressed her hard against the tree, lifted her higher with his arms and felt her hands lock behind his neck.

"_Oi lovebirds! Sei-chan's on the phone for dad!"_

Out of habit they tore apart quickly, remnants of the days when the slightest bit of noise forced them to push away. Rukia landed perfectly on her feet and Ichigo turned around to the direction of the voice half embarrassed, half annoyed.

"_You guys don't have to come all the way outside to make out you know! Just leave a note outside the closet or something!" _

Rukia laughed, Ichigo scratched the back of his neck in embarrassment and from the wooden rail of the porch, Yuria smirked cheekily.

"_Yeah, yeah, I'm coming!" _

With that he hurried toward the porch, ruffled his daughter's hair on the way and went inside to answer the call.

"_How's the homework going?" _

Arms crossed, Rukia calmly walked toward the porch, a flush on her cheeks and a warm smile on her lips

"_It's all right. I don't think I'll be held back this year."_

The mirth in Yuria's eyes was contagious and Rukia couldn't hold back the chuckle. She was a bright girl, the smartest in her year. But it wasn't just the constant good marks that made Rukia proud. It was also the hours of endless perseverance she knew were behind the success. If there was anything Yuria had learned from her father was to never accept defeat, even in math. She wondered sometimes what Yuria had learned from her. According to Ichigo, it was her bossiness. With a sigh, Rukia reached to tuck a back a stray lock of raven hair from her daughter's face.

"_Are you hungry? I can make you a snack"_

"_Mom we just ate dinner an hour ago!"_

She shook off the blunder with a smile, her fingers resting against her daughter's cheek. She was growing up to be such a pretty girl. And at twelve years old she was already drawing the eyes of many of the town's boys. Not that her tomboish daughter cared for the attention, if anything Rukia was thankful she was still so devoted to her martial arts classes.

"_Dad and I have to go away this weekend, it's just to a town close by. We're going to have to postpone our shopping trip." _

Yuria wrinkled her nose in distaste. She was glad the shopping was cancelled but never since she could remember, had her parents left town.

"_Why are you going?"_

"_We're just going to meet with someone. It won't take long. You'll spend the weekend with Granny."_

They were hiding something. That much was obvious, but Yuria was accustomed to the constant mystery surrounding her parents. They talked little about their past and never mentioned anything outside their small mountain town. Though she was curious, she was yet to mind.

"_Mom, is everything all right?"_

"_Of course it is."_

She masked the bitter taste of the lie with a smile and hoped Yuria wouldn't notice. Then to keep her daughter's all-seeing eyes from seeing right through her, she pulled the girl into a tight embrace.

"_Don't worry, everything's fine. We should be back by Sunday."_

Yuria's arms wrapped around her mother's waist. Rukia's long hair tickled her face so she buried her nose deeper into her mother's shoulder and breathed in the smell of softener. They were just pulling away when they saw Ichigo run out the door wearing a light jacket.

"_Ichigo what is it?"_

He stopped for a second, his expression forcibly calm.

"_The police just brought in a man who's badly injured. I need to go to the clinic and help Seiya. I'll call later." _

Hearing the child-friendly version of events worried Rukia. There was much more but she'd have to wait until he called to hear it.

"_Be careful Dad." _

He forced a smile for Yuria's sake and met Rukia's gaze one last time for strength. Finally, mother and daughter watched him run off in the direction of the clinic.

It was the smell that hit him first: burnt flesh and clotted blood. The moment he opened the door he had to fight back the nausea. The waiting area was crowded with police and the moment he was inside he heard Seiya yell for him to put on some scrubs and go help him in the examination room.

The sight of what was waiting for him there reminded him of the severed and exploded bodies of Arrancar during the Aizen war. On the table was the bloodied body of a man, lower chest torn open and pieces of flesh ripped off. He barely looked human but it was the realization that the man was still breathing that shocked Ichigo the most.

Animal attack, they said. But what mountain animal could tear open flesh in such a way? What jaws could be large enough to bite off so much of the legs? A chill quickly passed through Ichigo as he overheard the policeman in the room mention where he was found, just an hour away from town.

The Hollow was moving fast.

There was only so much they could do. The wounds were just too serious for them to do anything but administer drugs and try to stop the bleeding. Minutes later the man finally stopped breathing. Ichigo called the time of death and couldn't help but feel relieved the man had been spared more pain. He watched the soul leave the body and saw it disappear.

He was at peace, at last. But Ichigo wasn't. Then the worst occurred, a different sort of chill ran through his body. The Hollow was near.

He asked to be excused, there was something urgent he had to do. Seiya dismissed him with a pat on the shoulder and a 'See you tomorrow.' The moment Ichigo was out the door he forced his tired legs to run like they hadn't run since he was twenty years younger.

He ran home.

With every leap he could feel the chill getting stronger.

Another leap and he could smell the Hollow.

Then he heard a scream, and realized he recognized it.

It was the same scream that used to wake him and Rukia up at night because of nightmares.

"_Yuria!" _

He kept on running, he was so close. He tried to remember where he'd left his Shinigami badge until he remembered he never brought it here. No, he didn't need it anymore. He just had to focus. Ichigo stopped running, hid behind a cluster of trees by the side of the road and forced his mind to shut out his daughter's screams.

It was like a shock of high voltage electricity. It knocked his soul right out of his body and for the first time in over a decade Ichigo felt the weight of Zangetsu behind him.

He could breathe easier, felt stronger, younger. He smiled despite himself and flash stepped to the front of his house. There was a large hole on the wall, where the living room was and there were curling screams of despair coming from the inside.

"_YURIA!" _

He looked at the trashed living room, searched for any signs of them. Then another scream, it was coming from the kitchen. It was then he realized what his daughter kept screaming.

"_MOM! MOM! MOMMY" _

He ran into the kitchen to the sight of Yuria desperately clinging onto Rukia. She was on her knees, screaming and holding her mother's lifeless body to her.

"_MOOOM!" _

He ran toward them, fell on his knees and didn't even hear Yuria gasp. He was about to check for a pulse when an old truth hit him. It was a gigai. Lying on the ground was Rukia's gigai, abandoned while Rukia went to fight off the Hollow in the woods. She had probably ditched it in a hurry to prevent the Hollow from going after Yuria. He sighed in relief.

"_Daddy?"_

Confused, Ichigo turned to find his daughter looking at him with wide bloodshot eyes.

"_Yuria, you can see me?"_

"_Yeah... Dad what's going on? Mommy won't wake up" _She tried to choke back a sob but her shaking body failed her. He cupped her ashen face with his hands and forced her to look into his eyes.

"_Yuria listen to me. Mom's not dead. Right now she's fighting off the thing that attacked the house. I'm going to go help her but I promise you we'll be right back. I need you to stay here and look after Mom's body for me. Do you understand sweetheart?" _

Yuria nodded and Ichigo leaned in to kiss her forehead before getting up. In an instant he was in the woods. Tracking Rukia with the Hollow wouldn't be a problem, he just hoped Rukia wasn't hurt.

He found them quickly, she was dodging the Hollow's giant claws by using the woods to her advantage. She was fast, precise but still he could spot blood tainting her haori. She was leading it as deep into the woods as she could, probably looking for a clearing from which to use Sode no Shirayuki. He joined her quickly, drank her in.

"_Ichigo!" _

The relief in her voice filled him with giddy joy. The scenario felt so familiar he couldn't help but smile.

"_Need a hand Rukia?"_

She looked at him as if she was seeing him for the first time in years, and it was then he realized he was probably looking considerably younger.

"_Don't you know it's rude to stare, midget?" _

He savoured the outrage his comment caused. Had it not been for the Hollow's predatory scream he knew she would have thrown him a punch.

"_Try to control your spiritual pressure as much as you can Ichigo!" _

"_Right!"_

He understood she was trying to keep them under the radar but he couldn't wait to unsheathe Zangetsu once again.

Finally, many trees later a clearing was in sight. It was full of overgrown weeds and under the full moon it gave them the perfect visibility to fight it.

Rukia pulled out Sode no Shirayuki first and charged. She was successful in slicing off his shoulder, but the Hollow caught her with its remaining hand and threw her out into the forest. Like a seasoned Shinigami Ichigo attacked it quickly. If Rukia wanted him to use raw force, he would make sure to leave the Hollow as bloody as that man who'd died on the examination table. He jumped up high, thrust Zangetsu into its skull and forced it down until the Hollow was cut in half. Ichigo panted heavily and allowed himself a smile before running to check on Rukia.

He found her sitting on the ground, her back against a tree.

"_Are you all right?"_

She looked up at him, her violet eyes shining under the glare of the moon.

"_Yeah, just a little sore, it managed to nick my side but I should be well enough to heal it soon. How about you?"_

"_I'm fine"_

He settled down beside her, his mind still reeling from the fight. He'd forgotten so much, the rush, the power, the thrill. He'd forgotten it willingly after Yamamoto offered him the devil's deal. But now with power and youth surrounding him, he dared to think of a future after death. Perhaps not in Soul Society, maybe he'd contact Urahara in a few decades and ask him to have new gigais ready for Rukia and himself. The prospects could be endless, as long as he could convince Rukia to go along with it. With a smile he decided to focus on the present.

"_I found Yuria clinging to your gigai in the kitchen."_

She groaned and pressed a hand to her forehead.

"_I just traumatized her for life, didn't I? There was nothing else I could do, the thing was on its way upstairs. I had to act fast. She must've gone downstairs to check on the explosion and found me out cold on the floor"_

"_There's something else Rukia... she could see me, in spirit form."_

"_What?"_

"_Yeah, so chances are she saw the Hollow too."_

"_But, how? She's never shown signs of having spiritual abilities."_

"_Well yeah, but then again how many spirits have you and I seen since we moved here? This isn't exactly an active area."_

She heard Rukia groan again. They'd talked about once before, of someday telling Yuria the truth. But she'd been too young still so they'd decided to postpone the decision. Now they had no choice left. At least now she would believe them without the shadow of a doubt.

"_This will take a while to explain"_

Ichigo's hand reached to grasp hers.

"_We'll do it together"_

She squeezed his hand, grateful for it, for him. With a smirk Rukia turned to look at him under the light of the moon.

"_You know Ichigo, I'd forgotten how good looking you used to be" _

His outrage kept her fully amused until they made it home.

* * *

><p>The same song repeated itself for the fifth time before Yuria ran her thumb over the UpodX to change it. The device was getting old but she didn't mind, it'd been a birthday gift from her parents when she turned fifteen. She recalled it'd also come with a healthy side plate lecture on hearing loss and traffic accidents. She smiled at the memory but turned up the volume another bar. She liked the new headphones because she thought they made her look cool, they also reminded her of the ones her Dad wore in an old picture. She dug into her side jean pocket to check for a message before she entirely passed the convenience store. She'd left cram school early after deeming the lesson too useless and the day too nice to spend it cooped up inside. It wasn't like she needed it anyway, she'd enrolled in it because otherwise she'd get lazy and not review anything over summer vacation. She'd be taking university exams in the upcoming year and although she was smart, she couldn't afford to slack off.<p>

She wasn't surprised to find a text from her Dad but the content made her laugh. He'd forgotten his empty bento box at work, again. It was the second time this week and Mom was far from pleased. She quickly texted that she'd pick it up on the way and with another change of tune she turned the street toward the clinic.

Maybe, if she could finish the homework chapter without trouble, she'd skip cram school tomorrow and go help out Mom at the preschool. The kids were always cute and playing with them guaranteed hours of entertainment. On the other hand, she knew Dad and Sei-chan would greatly appreciate a secretarial hand at the clinic and she might even get lucky enough to see someone come in with something gory.

She'd gone camping with her parents on the first weekend of vacation. They'd gone to a clearing deep in the forest and she'd loved lying under the stars listening to them argue about the constellations. Maybe tonight she'd persuade her Mom to bake something, cookies or a cake. They always gave Dad the batter to mix and Yuria always got to cut the cookie shapes. Whenever they made cake she liked leaving the decorating to Mom since she was so good at it. She remembered the birthday cake her Mom made her when she turned seven; a little bear and Yuria had cried because they had to eat it. Maybe they'd make a chocolate cake tonight. They'd bought all the ingredients last week. Dad would surely like that, and they even had fresh strawberries in the fridge.

Yuria opened the door of the clinic and welcomed the cool air conditioning against her bare neck. It never got too hot in town but she burned easily under the sun. Eventually Rukia had opted for sneaking in a bottle of sun block into every one of Yuria's bags. It'd proven effective in keeping the fair skinned girl from matching her father's hair.

Yuria removed her headphones and glanced over the empty chairs of the waiting room before announcing herself.

"_Sei-chan! I'm here to pick up Dad's bento!" _

It was the smell that cued her in, perfume. No one in town wore perfume to go see the doctor.

She stood debating whether it was best to just leave when she heard Seiya's voice coming from the hallway.

"_Yuria-chan! How wonderful to see you! Maybe you can help us."_

He sounded coldly polite and immediately Yuria knew something was off. Then from the hallway leading to the examination rooms, she watched five strangers walk into the waiting room. Three men, two women. They varied in ages but something about the black haired, older man with a beard seemed familiar.

"_These people are looking for the Kuroki's. They claim to be family of theirs. Say, you wouldn't happen to recall Kuroki-sensei mentioning anything about a father and sisters, would you Yuria-chan?"_

Her heart hammered against her ribcage so hard she wondered if they could hear it.

"_I, umm... no I don't think so... I mean..."_

"_You see this gentleman here claims to be Rukia-san's older brother. And these two ladies claim to be Kuroki-sensei's sisters. I was thinking of calling Kuroki-sensei to clarify this matter."_

She understood Seiya was trying to make time for them. But time for what? She knew her parents had run away from their old lives so they could be together. But where would they go to now? Beside, her mother was a Shinigami, could the dead even have relatives? Maybe this was all a trap, in which case she should warn her parents and they should all leave town immediately.

"_I think that's a great idea. May I use the phone Yashimora-sensei?"_

"_Go right ahead Yuria-chan."_

Without another glance at the strangers she rushed to her Dad's examination room. She locked the door behind her and rushed to dial her home number. She listened to the phone ring while looking at a baby picture of herself holding a pink blanket over her head. Then she heard her father's voice.

"_Daddy, there's five people at the clinic saying they're your family members. There's two women that say they're your sisters and a man who says he'd your dad and another man who's Mom's brother and some other guy with white hair. What should I do? Sei-chan's trying to buy time." _

The silence that followed made her heartbeat deafening.

"_Bring them here."_

"_What? But Dad!"_

"_Just bring them here, Mom and I will handle it. Don't worry, everything will be all right."_

"_Dad, are you sure?"_

Another pause, then a sigh.

"_Yeah, we are. It's going to be ok Yuria."_

Yuria sighed, she thought about asking him to pass the phone to Mom but he's specifically said '**we**'. Somehow both her parents had lost their sanity.

"_Fine, **we**'ll be there soon."_

She hung up the phone in a malhumoured way and was about to leave the office when she spotted an empty bento on the desk, beside her Mom's latest picture. With a frown she grabbed the bento and made her way back to the living room.

Curiosity would have been natural in her position, except she found herself lacking the slightest interest in them. She walked a few paces ahead and only looked back to make sure they were following her.

The light haired woman did look remotely like her father and she reluctantly admitted that the dark haired woman's scowl looked a lot like her Dad's. Even her Mom's so-called brother had a familiar air to him. She sighed in annoyance and picked up the pace. She knew they were probably struggling going uphill, especially the older man, but all she wanted was to get home.

"_Oi, slow down! This isn't a race! Can't you see we have a senior citizen here?" _

Had Yuria looked back, she would have seen the older man glare daggers at the dark haired woman. But instead Yuria stopped cold, giving them time to catch up while pretending they weren't there. She had never, in her seventeen years of life been so rude to anyone. And although it made her feel guilty, she wasn't sorry. She knew these people were here to turn her life upside down.

When they were finally just behind her, she resumed walking. She heard the two women and the older man complain about the long trip and about the inclined walk. However the other two men said nothing. It was with great relief that Yuria spotted her house at the end of the inclined road. Once again she picked up her pace, ignoring the voiced complaint of the dark haired woman.

She wanted home.

She wanted her parents.

The faster she walked the more she could see. First, her bedroom window in the second floor, then the porch's ceiling from where her Mom liked to star gaze. Then the large beams of the porch itself where they all liked to spend lazy summer afternoons drinking cold tea. Finally, she spotted a bright mane of orange hair followed by a face she'd known since she was born.

She didn't realize she'd run the rest of the way until after she found herself panting in her mother's arms. She was just slightly taller than Rukia now but that was ok, because that was just a little change. Just like her Dad getting older was a little change as well. Yuria did well with small changes, but something in the pit of her stomach told her that the people right behind her brought nothing but bitterness.

Yuria felt her Mom push her to arm's length. They were both smiling reassuringly at her, as if she was still the same scared twelve year old who watched her parents re-enter their physical bodies. She felt like she'd felt then, terrified by the possibilities that could shatter her world. Just a few heartbeats later, Yuria watched her parent's gazes focus on something behind her.

"_Nii-sama" _

Human nerves physically betray.

That, she'd learned just by watching Ichigo's nerves of steel liquefy during their first year of 'going out'. She recalled with perfect clarity the cool, confident way he told her he was in love with her, only to feel his heart going into cardiac arrest the moment she pressed her hand to his chest to lean in for a kiss. Another time, he'd looked nothing but serene while asking her out on a first date, except for the sweat on his brow and clammy hands. It still amused her to think that the same man who could tear Hollows to shreds and charge into wars without a thought, could become a nervous wreck over her.

Now Rukia cursed her own nerves as she tried to keep her hands from shaking while emptying a bag of cookies onto a platter. Thankfully she was in the kitchen, alone. She'd given the tea to Yuria and hopefully it was now being poured, preferably not on the guests. With a sigh for courage, Rukia picked up the tray and carried it into the crowded living room.

The sound of the tray gently dropping on the wooden table resonated like thunder. Immediately, Yuria moved away from the table to give her mother room to sit. Seeing that everyone had something to look down at in front of them, Rukia settled down beside Ichigo, promptly ignoring Karin's piercing gaze. It was Isshin who broke the silence.

"_This is a lovely home you have here, son."_

"_Thanks. It's not big but it's enough for the three of us."_

Ichigo was surprised to find a sort of gentle comfort radiating from his father. As if he was simply happy to be sitting face-to-face with his son again. It brought a tugging guilt to Ichigo's heart.

"_So they really are your parents?"_

Surprised, Yuria looked up to meet the light haired woman's confused gaze.

"_Yes they are."_

"_Yuria is adopted, Yuzu. But she's ours." _

Tears blurred Yuzu's vision. For twenty-two years she'd fantasized so much about this moment. She'd gone through every possible speech, every emotional reaction, but now as she stood in front of her brother and his happy family, she could only mourn the loss of the brother she'd known. Somehow she'd childishly hoped she'd find him the same as always, still young, still the same Ichigo, but the man before her was a stranger.

"_I have twin girls... they're eleven..."_

He smiled at her, lovingly and Yuzu felt like the same little girl who'd laughed in glee the first time her brother praised her simple onigiri.

"_They're always fighting, but they mostly get along. I would love for them to meet their Uncle"_

Like a spell, the loving, warm smile was gone. Replaced with a solemn look crowned by his infamous scowl. Yuzu allowed the tears to fall without a sound.

Beneath the table, away from anyone's gaze Ichigo clenched Rukia's hand, hard. She squeezed back with equal fervour, letting him know they were in it together, always. Suddenly, Rukia felt something change. His grip loosened just a little and his feature eased.

"_I would love to meet them Yuzu. But I can't given the circumstances. The deal was that if we tried to contact any of you, Soul Society would go after you." _

Rukia's gaze dropped at realizing what Ichigo was doing, even with his family in front of him he was trying to assess the risks. Through the tears Yuzu smiled excitedly, her mouth opened but was interrupted by a visible older Toshiro Histugaya.

"_That is what we came here to discuss. There's been a change in the circumstance."_

"_What sort of change?" _

The captain of the tenth division looked purposely at the young girl close by.

"_Is it all right to speak of this freely?" _

Ichigo watched his daughter's blue eyes flare with indignation. He smirked.

"_Yuria knows about it already."_

Hitsugaya nodded, inhaled and quickly dropped the bomb.

"_The Captain Commander is dead." _

"_When?"_ Rukia didn't bother masking her surprise. The man was as old as dirt after all, how could he have died?

"_Recently. He developed a condition years ago which got progressively worse."_

"_How does that change anything?"_

Rukia nearly slapped Ichigo's hand at the rude remark. She looked to her brother, her mouth slightly parted, looking for confirmation. Byakuya gave her a brisk nod and Rukia settled back with an expression that reminded Yuria of when her Mom and other town ladies found out the elderly grocer ran had away with Hiro's grandmother in an amorous affair. It was simply too bizarre to completely believe.

"_He named a successor before he died."_

"_Can he do that?"_

Ichigo's indifferent tone caused both Byakuya and Karin to regard him with curiosity. In his seat, Hitsugaya shifted uncomfortably.

"_Apparently, since he did it."_

"_Who did he name?"_

Cold, Ichigo's amber eyes were cold and calculative. Gone was the reactive young man unafraid to wear his emotions. Karin choked up. Byakuya conducted the ultimate experiment.

"_It is you, Kurosaki Ichigo"_

Ichigo and Byakuya held each other's stares with matched expressions. Underneath the table Rukia's hand went limp.

"_So?"_

The sound of Isshin choking on his tea cut the tension. As Yuzu fussed about her father and Karin served him more tea, the two men looked away from each other. Cough under control, Isshin finally laughed.

"_They hand you Soul Society in a gold platter and all you say is, so?"_

The hearty, scandalous laugh filled the room causing Rukia to crack a genuine smile. The sound was so nostalgic.

"_It doesn't matter who that old bastard named as his successor, Dad. I'm not interested."_

In took but a second for Isshin to sober up.

"_Don't be foolish boy"_

It came out so naturally that it wasn't until after it was said that Isshin realized the term no longer applied. His son was no longer a boy, he hadn't been one ever since he challenged all of Soul Society for the woman he loved.

"_Nothing good can come out of that."_

He sounded so sure, so entirely wise that it made Karin shoot up from her seat and lose that last strand of stability she was holding on to.

"_Nothing good? How about being able to see your family and friends again Ichi-nii! How about meeting your nieces and your nephew and your friends' kids? How about going home for the first time in twenty years!" _

"_Karin"_ Pleaded Yuzu, her hand on her sister's arm.

"_No! You left to protect us? Bullshit! You ran away with **her**! You gave us up because you loved her more. And now that you finally have a way of getting everything you wanted you're just going to throw it away?"_

"_Nothing ever comes easily Karin, you know that. There's no chance that old bastard would leave **me** in charge of Soul Society."_

His tone hit her like a bucket of cold water. She suddenly felt like a fool for believing this would be as easy as picking him up and bringing him home.

"_And yet, he did." _Hitsugaya mused, making it clear he was still coming to terms with the illogical decision himself. _"Soul Society is in an uproar over the Captain Commander's last wish, but everyone's had to accept you're the most qualified in terms of riatsu and spiritual ability. The things you've been able to do have far surpassed a captain's level." _

"_So just because of that Yamamoto decided to name me his successor? After what he put us through? After what he made us do?"_

It was Byakuya, who'd spent the last eighteen months trying to come to terms with the sudden irony of the situation, who dared to reply the answerless question.

"_Yes."_

"_Well fuck me."_

A breathless grunt followed the sarcastic profanity and it took a second for everyone to realize Rukia had punched him in the stomach with the back of her hand. _"Damn it Rukia."_ He whispered breathlessly. From somewhere in the back Yuria's light laughter filled the room.

The ripple effect was notorious. All except Byakuya cracked a grin, but Rukia went back to matters at hand without missing a beat.

"_Ichigo would have to die before he could claim anything."_

"_No one is dying!"_ Yuria pronounced. The memory of her mother's lifeless body sprawled on the kitchen floor reappearing before her eyes.

"_The Captain Commander specified that Kurosaki Ichigo would be allowed to live out his full mortal life."_

Ichigo looked at Byakuya, searching for signs of deceit in his expressionless face. But the noble's eyes were fixed on Rukia, and that pissed him off.

"_So you're telling me I can do whatever I want without Soul Society's interference and when I finally die, I get to become king?" _

He made sure to sound like a cocky bastard and he drank Byakuya's quiet rage like good sake. It was the feel of Rukia's hand grasping his under the table that stopped his spite. He turned to look at her, her furrowed brow, her disapproving eyes.

_Stop it Ichigo, you're going too far_. They said.

And he knew he was. He was acting like a downright asshole, but how was he suppose to act after twenty some years?

_They're family too_. Her eyes said.

And he was happy to see his sisters again, his Dad too. But how could he look at them like before when it had been them who'd locked him up in his room, window barred to keep him from breaking into Soul Society again? He'd loved them all so, still did, but he still felt so **betrayed**.

'_Just forget about her Ichi-nii!'_

'_You'll see her again someday Onii-chan'_

'_She wants you to live out your life son'_

'_It is for the best'_

He'd bled for them all, Soul Society included. Fought for them, killed for them, protected them time and time again. Yet they'd acted **relieved** when Yamamoto finally threatened to condemn him to suffer the same fate as Aizen if he ever used his powers again while living. The last war had been too much, they said. They wanted him to have a life, graduate from University, fulfill his dreams. And then when Rukia was used as blackmail against him they tried everything they could to keep him from going to rescue her. Did they ever consider what **he** wanted? How much he needed her?

It still pissed him off.

_Stop it Ichigo. _He could hear her voice so clearly in his head. It kept him sane.

He sighed, scratched the back of his head and turned to look at their guests. It wouldn't be like this if it was a trap. They wouldn't have sent his sisters, his father and Byakuya here to speak to him and Rukia. Moreover, Byakuya would have never put up with this much rudeness from him unless he really thought Ichigo somehow outranked him.

"_I swear if this is in any way a trap, I will unleash such hell upon Sereitei that there will be nothing left to build on after I'm done." _

The weight of the threat did not come from the tone, but rather from the knowledge that he really could fulfill it. The almighty Sereitei had gotten a glimpse of Ichigo's spiritual pressure when he went to rescue Rukia that second time. But somehow both captains suspected they'd only seen the tip of the iceberg.

Had Yamamoto known what he was getting himself into would he have given the Substitute Shinigami his powers back? Histugaya wondered.

"_We swear upon our titles we're telling you the truth Kurosaki."_

Ichigo held Hitsugaya's gaze. Then after what felt like hours, Ichigo finally sighed again and looked down at his cold tea.

"_Well fuck me." _

The house sounded strange, uncomfortable, crowded. And it really was, they'd managed to fit five extra people in it after all. Rukia laid still, listening to the even sound of her daughter's breathing coming from the futon sprawled out beside their bed. Yuria had grudgingly surrendered her bed over to her 'aunts' for the night but she'd opted for sleeping in her parents' room instead of spending the night at Granny Asakura's. Rukia knew her daughter well enough to guess Yuria feared she and Ichigo would be taken away during the night. The girl had Ichigo's overprotective streak in her and Rukia couldn't figure out how.

Beside Rukia, Ichigo drifted in and out of awareness. Moments ran through his mind like clips from a movie, old fights, old enemies, old friends and old get-togethers. But it was the image of his Zampakuto slicing through the heart of the leader of the Vandenreich that anchored him awake. He took in the familiar ceiling of their room and relaxed at the feel of Rukia's fingers running over his forehead, smoothing out lines.

"_You were dreaming."_ She whispered.

He exhaled and extended an arm to draw her in. She snuggled against his side, her head over his heart, his hand automatically running over her back.

"_I think I was remembering things"_

"_What kind of things?"_

"_Stuff I chose to forget... old fights... the Blood War."_

"_Feels like a lot, doesn't it?"_

"_Yeah." _

He buried his nose in her hair and suddenly Rukia found herself lying directly on top of him. His left arm pinned her waist to his lower abdomen, his right arm clenched her torso and with his mouth beside her ear, Ichigo spoke again.

"_What should I do Rukia?" _

"_What do you **want** to do?"_

"_I want to grab you and Yuria and get the fuck away from here" _

She freed her arms enough to wrap them around his chest.

"_This is our home Ichigo. We don't have to go anywhere." _

"_They want me to take over Soul Society"_

"_I know"_

"_I can't do that. I can't be Captain Commander"_

"_Yamamoto thought you could."_

"_He was senile"_

She drowned the chuckle with his cheek.

"_Your spiritual powers are beyond anything Soul Society's ever seen Ichigo, and you're not even dead yet. It makes sense for him to have chosen you as his successor."_

"_After everything he put us through?"_

"_Just because he made a big mistake before doesn't mean he was a complete idiot." _

"_So you think I should accept?"_

"_There's no need for you to make a decision now. At the moment it just means you'll be able to visit Karakura and see everyone again."_

She remembered Karin's piercing gaze, the resentment in her eyes. Rukia was sure she'd receive a similar reception from everyone concerned. They'd all loved him after all, and she'd been the reason he left.

"_We will"_

"_What?"_

"_**We**'ll visit Karakura. There's no way I'm setting foot outside of town without you and Yuria."_

She smiled despite her desire to argue. She wanted to tell him she wouldn't be welcome there anymore, that their daughter would probably receive the same judgemental look Yuzu had given her. But she didn't, because Ichigo didn't need any more dark shadows in his heart. Instead she just held him tightly.

"_When do you want to do it?"_

"_Yuria's on break right now and it's low season at the preschool. Considering I've never taken a vacation, I'm pretty sure I can ask Seiya for a couple weeks off." _

"_So we're leaving with them?"_

"_Might as well, the sooner this is over with the faster we can get back to normal."_

Normal, their normal. It was the life they created from the rubble of broken dreams. A sort of life that though calm in comparison to fighting Hollows, made them happier than they ever thought they could be. That's what he wanted to go back to. A world with only her in it.

She drowned her smile into his neck thinking of how right Karin was to hate her so. Rukia could ask him for anything. She could ask for them to move back to Karakura and he would give in because that's what she wanted. Except she never would, because they were happy like this. But also because now more than ever, she felt that Ichigo deserved to do whatever he wanted before a world of responsibilities fell on his shoulders.

"_Did you talk to your brother?"_

"_A little, while I was setting up his futon in the living room." _

"_Did he say anything to you?"_

"_Just that he was pleased to see I was well."_

Ichigo drowned his snort into her neck. How typical of Byakuya to be emotionally challenged, he thought. But he was also relieved; he'd feared the poker-faced captain would try to guilt-trip Rukia into returning to Soul Society. He'd tried it once before, on the day they left. Even while paralyzed under his spiritual pressure Byakuya had managed to remind his sister of her 'duty' as a Kuchiki and a Shinigami. Rukia's pride kept her from breaking down then, but the scar in her heart remained. Always reminding her of the duty she turned away from. Ichigo understood how much it still affected her by the pained expression the mention of the Kuchiki surname still brought. Maybe, he mused, that was the real reason behind her easiness to adopt the Kuroki name as her own.

"_What's that suppose to..."_

He silenced her in his usual manner, with his tongue exploring the wonders of her mouth. It used to make her so angry, this tactic of his for shutting her up, it wasn't until she realized what those kisses meant that she gave in. He urgently brought a hand to cup the side of her face, urgently brushing long black hair aside to make contact with skin. Her legs parted to straddle his lower abdomen and Ichigo tried to pull her closer against him in response.

"_Oi! Can't you two teenagers quit it? I'm trying to sleep!"_

Yuria's annoyed, groggy voice washed over them like a bucket of cold water. Both blushed scarlet, looked at Rukia's side of the bed and were relieved to find that their daughter hadn't bothered to sit up from her futon. Just to be sure, Rukia sat up on Ichigo's abdomen and stretched to take a peek at her girl. She smiled at seeing that Yuria had folded a pillow to cover her ears in an indignant gesture.

"_Is she awake?"_

He was so quiet it took Rukia a moment to understand him.

"_She'll go back to sleep soon."_

Carefully, Rukia moved back to her side of the bed and Ichigo turned to his side, facing her.

"_We should get some sleep ourselves. Tomorrow will be long."_ She whispered, pulling up the blanket that lay bunched at their feet.

"_Yeah..."_

He moved to lie on his back but even through the darkness she could tell he was scowling. Carefully, she moved closer till her cheek touched his bare shoulder.

"_It's going to be all right Ichigo."_

She interlaced their fingers and automatically he clenched tight.

"_You're never allowed to leave me Rukia."_

It'd been a while since she last heard that tone of urgent finality from him, the nostalgia of it made her smile.

"_You're never allowed to leave __**me**__." _She countered, her tone playful. But she could tell his heart was in the middle of a storm.

"_I mean it!... Even if I become Captain Commander, even if I have to keep fighting wars forever... you **can't** leave me. I'd nev- AH!"_

He felt her press light kisses over the area of his shoulder she'd just bitten into, but to little avail. The bite mark continued to throb and he looked at her through the darkness with unmasked righteous anger.

"_What the-"_

"_Just shut up already. And lower your voice, you'll wake Yuria." _

He grudgingly complied and only hesitated slightly when Rukia moved his injured arm so she could snuggle against his side. She arranged herself so her breath tickled his ear and his skin flared in response, just as it had done the first time she did this, so very many years ago.

"_You listen to me strawberry. I won't leave you, not because you order me not to. I'm staying because __**you're**__ mine. If you think the responsibility of being the Captain Commander's __**wife**__ is going to scare me off, then you've learned nothing in the twenty-seven years we've known each other."_ She captured his cheek with her hand and used it to turn his head to face her. _"I love you Ichigo... we're in this together, remember? Through the best and the worst, and this is definitely not the worst."_

He chuckled despite his desire to sob. His hand caressed her left cheek and he drew her closer until their foreheads touched.

"_You're my strength Rukia."_

"_Fool, your strength is your own. I'm just good at drawing it out."_

He drowned his chuckle with her lips, one hand on her neck, an arm around her waist. He wasn't gentle but she didn't want him to be. They kissed like they always had, with desperate abandon. When they finally stopped, sore and out of breath, the sight of daylight breaking the darkness greeted them.

They looked at each other with the same accomplice look they shared whenever daybreak sneaked in on them making love. Their sleepless nights were their secret alone but tonight they had to get some sleep. In silent understanding Rukia laid her head back down on Ichigo's shoulder and he kissed the crown of her head adoringly. Minutes later they were both asleep. Three hours later the smell of breakfast broke their slumber.

Rukia took out the small silver key from the lock and went over her mental list again. All windows were closed, all doors locked and all appliances disconnected. Asakura-san had their contact information in case of an emergency and their spending money was in her purse. Key still clutched in her hand, Rukia sighed and turned around. Right behind her stood Ichigo, a suitcase in each hand, wearing the composure and confidence of the forty year old man he was. By the foot of the porch, Yuria stood carrying a suitcase and wearing a scowl worthy of her father. Beside Yuria, Isshin continued his attempts to bond with his new granddaughter by telling her an embarrassing story about Ichigo as a baby. Across from them, Karin and Yuzu guarded their brother's movements, as if afraid he'd suddenly take off if they didn't watch him. Furthest away from them and looking longingly at the road was Hitsugaya, who Rukia imagined was counting the minutes till he could get back to Soul Society. Finally, off to the side stood Byakuya looking straight at her with an expression that could almost be considered tender. She directed a smile at her brother, brushed back a lock of hair and walked away from the door with Ichigo by her side.

She made it to the foot of the porch stairs before giving into the desire to look back. Over twenty years ago they'd rented an abandoned little house from a nice older couple. They'd turned it into their home, their sanctuary. It stood tall as a symbol of the life they'd made here, of the trust they'd been able to give again and the dreams they'd rebuilt. It had sheltered them and their daughter for decades. It had even survived a Hollow attack. Tears blurred Rukia's vision but Ichigo's sudden grip on her shoulder kept them from falling. He hugged her tightly to his chest.

"_We're coming back Rukia."_

He whispered, and she believed him.

Because Ichigo Kurosaki never broke his promises.

END

Well my loves, this is it!

I wouldn't have been able to finish this monster of a chapter without the help of your reviews. Whenever I was feeling inept I went back to re-read them for encouragement.

For whoever was wondering, Yuria is originally a Hebrew name. But to be honest the first time I heard about it was in a manga where it was applied to a girl. After a little research I discovered that in Japan it's usually a girl's name. It apparently means light in Hebrew, but I have been unable to find if it has another meaning in Japanese. Honestly, I picked it because it sounds close to Rukia :)

Thank you from the bottom of my heart, and **please** do review. Who knows, reviews might spark an **epilogue** (wink).

Revised March 2012- Bare with me please, there's so much to correct .


	4. Epilogue

This has been a long time coming, I know. I'm sure most of you would give me quite the talk about keeping you waiting for so long if you could. I have three thousand excuses and about fifty of them are quite legit. But I shall not bore you with them.

What you should know is that I will be disappointing some of you. This chapter is mostly smut. My goal was to wrap a nice golden bow around this story of mine. Most importantly however, I wanted to do this life that I made Rukia and Ichigo have, justice. This story has revolved around them and them alone, their love, selfishness, obsessions, craziness, relationship and that was how I wanted to end it. Not in a whirlwind of characters and sudden plots.

Finally, thank you all from the bottom of my heart for your support. I finished this because of every single person that reviewed, favourite and followed this story. I ask that if you liked it, you comment. Also, I will be ALTERING some of the previous chapters because there are mistakes. So keep an eye out if you're ever bored enough

Thanks for reading.

Cabin Fever- Epilogue

The curtains were drawn again.

They insisted upon it, as if the warmth of the sun could harm him.

She'd discussed it with Hakame-san at the beginning, but the old nurse wouldn't budge.

"_Kuroki-sensei can't sleep with the curtains open Kuroki-san. He becomes agitated unless you're there with him."_

So she'd called a truce and instead taken to opening the curtains the moment she arrived, right after Hakane-san left. It was her small way of letting him know she was home and even through the fog of the drugs, she knew he understood.

Today was no exception, even if he was no longer conscious at all.

She pulled back the curtains to allow the cheerful late afternoon sun in, bathing him in light. He was sixty-five, (seventy in the town's eyes) far too young to be bedridden, but the cancer was quickly taking him away. She ran the back of her hand over the side of his aged face. He was so handsome still, 'her handsome old man' she'd joked. He threw her death glares every time she'd said it.

He inhaled deeply at the touch, as if glad for it and she smiled.

"_I'll be right back Ichigo. I'm just going to heat up supper."_

She leaned in to kiss his dry lips, just a peck, just enough. She always ate while telling him all about her day. She told him about the preschool, of the people who'd asked about him, of the latest gossip. Just thirteen days ago he'd still been able to reply, to offer a soft smile or ask about someone. But then the pain worsened, and so did the drugs. Now she did all the talking, knowing he could still hear her and understand.

In the kitchen, she took out a box from the freezer, opened it into a plate and put it inside the microwave. She thought about phoning Yuria while watching the timer, but decided not to when thinking of the lecture her daughter was bound to give her if she found out what her mother was eating. Rukia no longer bothered to make dinner from scratch. She either bought it outside, pre-made or ate whatever her sympathetic co-workers, Seiya or anyone else was kind enough to prepare for her. Yuria often reprimanded her for it.

"_Mom, Sei-chan told me you're not eating properly. Those frozen things aren't much healthier than instant ramen, you know! Why won't you let me hire someone to make your meals?"_

Though Yuria's loving nagging often amused her mother, Rukia simply wasn't in the mood for it today. Following the beep from her little 'cooking vault' she opened the door with as much awe as the first time she'd done it. She'd discovered the wonders of microwaving quite late. In fact, the contraption had been give to them by Yuzu as a gift when Yuria went away for her first year of University. She remembered it'd arrived along with a note that had read: _'For those late romantic nights when you have no time to cook (wink).' _

"_It looks like a safe Ichigo" _She'd said while her long index finger reached to poke the new contraption. Beside her, Ichigo instinctively massaged the back of his neck, his eyes still fixed on the note.

"_I know, but it works like an oven"_

He reread the note if only to try to find clues as to why on earth his little sister had sent a microwave halfway across Japan. Why not a box of chocolates? Or a nice, normal, congratulatory card, like Karin and Orihime had done. He was just about to go look for Yuzu's phone number when Rukia's question stopped him dead.

"_So I can bake in it?"_

A flashing image of the kitchen in flames landed his attention back on his wife.

"_No! You heat things in it, like dinner, though it's not supposed to be good for you."_

"_Why?"_

"_Because of the way it works." _

Rukia frowned with confusion in that adorable way he liked. It always made him want to drag out his answers just to keep it on her face.

"_So Yuzu gave us a dangerous appliance?"_

"_It's not really dangerous, it's fine once in a while but not all the time... actually I've got an idea, but I've gotta go to the store." _

He'd returned with a box of popcorn and proceeded to show her how to pop it in the microwave. She was so thrilled they went through eight boxes of the stuff in three days before Ichigo threatened to trash the thing if she didn't give it a rest.

Who would have thought decades later the old microwave would finally get so much use. She shook her head in a useless attempt to clear the memories. The house was full of them. The kitchen alone stored thousands of moments, beautiful, heart-wrenching instants. She remembered the first time they cooked in this kitchen, remembered how Ichigo had chopped the vegetables while she sliced the meat. Remembered the silence they shared as they came to terms with the consequences of their actions. She remembered the times they'd made love on that counter. It'd been few because it was uncomfortable but she could still hear his voice, hoarse from moaning, saying her name. She bit her lip to keep the tears in. Shut her eyes to keep from remembering how many times he'd walked right into this kitchen after work to kiss her hello. Of how many times **she'd** walked in to find him cooking something wearing his favourite apron… the blue one with the number fifteen printed on the front, the one that now hung from the wall next to her pink panda bear apron. It was agonizing to miss him this much.

"_No!"_

She slammed her withered hands hard against the counter.

"_Idiot! He's not dead yet."_

The desperate plea echoed in the kitchen, reminding her once more of how much she missed the sound of his voice, the sound of her name on his lips, his steps on the wooden floor, his breath tickling her neck. Heart aching, she grabbed the plate along with a glass full of water and dashed away from the kitchen as fast as her feet could take her.

It was the sound of his heart monitor beeping rhythmically that finally calmed her frazzled nerves. She walked in slowly, set her plate and glass down on the little plastic table she kept there for eating and exhaled in relief. Her hand reached to trace his hallowed cheek, up his temple to comb through his growing greying hair. Her other hand reached toward his chest, coming to rest above his heartbeat and before she realized it she was lying down beside him. Her body pressed against his side, her hands memorizing every touch.

He'd been so worried about her. Thirteen days ago he pleaded with her to accompany Yuria to her medical convention in Tokyo.

"_At this rate I won't be hanging around much longer. It'd be good for Yuria to spend time with you before we both leave."_

His words were reasonable and Rukia might have even believed him, if it hadn't been for the way his pleading eyes revealed he simply didn't want her to see him like this anymore. He wasn't used to being helpless, hated feeling so incredibly weak and sick, abhorred having to depend on anyone to do even the simplest of tasks. He knew he was getting worse, knew how much pain he was putting Rukia through and he wanted her away from him.

"_I'm not leaving you Ichigo. Deal with it."_

He wasn't pleased, but sleep overcame him before he could come up with a retort. He came back-to in the middle of the night. He awakened to the sight of moonlight streaming through the window and Rukia's uneven breathing beside him. Knowing she was still awake he turned his head, his hand squeezing the hand she'd interlaced with his sometime ago. He watched her open her bright violet eyes and smile lazily at him.

It was her smile that always unmade him.

"_I just want to stay the same man that you keep in your heart Rukia."_ He whispered.

"_Fool, you are my heart. Don't you know that by now?"_

He smiled, tenderly, lovingly. He'd loved her for fifty years, and he'd gladly love her five hundred more. One day, he thought, they'd look back on this moment and laugh at their dramatics. But right now, at this moment Ichigo finally understood why she'd agreed to surrender everything to be with him. It was a simple biological reason, neither of them could possibly survive without a heart.

He hadn't woken up since and every day she felt him slipping away further. She shouldn't be this devastated, she scolded herself. She was perhaps the only woman in the world who had no real reason to mourn her dying lover. After all he'd most likely just separate from his body in full Shinigami gear and youthful stupor to tease her relentlessly until she shed her Gigai and joined him. Except he wasn't dead, or alive. He laid there in a sort of middle-ground hell of silence and stillness that drove her insane.

Maybe he was doing this to piss her off.

Maybe he could, actually open his eyes but chose not to just to spite her. Or maybe the drugs had him trapped in a place where he was always aware of his surroundings but couldn't move his body. Or maybe he was lost somewhere in his mind and couldn't come out.

"_Please, Ichigo."_

She needed him to give her a sign. Something to tell her he wouldn't remain like this forever. To reassure her that she would again feel his touch, hear his voice, see those beautiful amber eyes that she missed so much.

Slowly, after days of insomnia, the sound of his breathing lured her into a deep, exhausted slumber.

It was at exactly eight-thirty six pm that an unending beeping sound filled the master bedroom. Although intrusive, the sound was not turned up high enough to cause the utterly exhausted Rukia to awaken. It continued till the screen went black, unplugged in a rush from the wall outlet. It was strange, Ichigo realized, to stand over his own dead body and not feel the slightest bit of sadness. Then again the body lying dead on the bed looked nothing like the 'him' that he remembered. The old man before him looked sick, shrivelled, and tired, so no, he did not feel a loss. Instead his eyes went to rest on Rukia, feasting on the sight of her after who knows how many days. Even old she looked beautiful. He wanted to memorize every little wrinkle because he didn't known when, or even if he'd ever get to see her like this again. After all in Soul Society, aging took centuries. He noticed the untouched food plate and glass of water left forgotten on the little table. Judging from the way the skin clung to her tiny wrists he figured this wasn't the first time she went without food.

"_This was exactly why I didn't want you here Rukia."_

He reached out to tenderly pull back a stray lock of hair away from her cheek. He should wake her, tell her he was free, move her away from his dead body but she looked so very tired. It'd probably be better if he made her something to eat first. Resisting the urge to kiss her temple, he released a sigh and picked up the cold food plate.

He never thought walking around his own house could feel this great. For months he'd needed help just to get from the bed to the bathroom and lately he hadn't even been able to do that much. He'd missed his independence, his free movement, the feeling of weightlessness typical of youth. For the first time in half a year Ichigo wanted to dance in glee. He was about to step into the kitchen when the sound of the front door opening stopped him in his tracks. He heard the jingling of keys and saw a bit of long raven hair from his spot. He stilled, holding a plate in the middle of the hallway, a beaming smile on his lips.

The new arrival quickly kicked off her heels and rushed inside, briefcase and a grocery bag in hand. She looked exhausted, hinting she'd probably done the nine hour driving trip from the city to town right after her conference.

Her head lifted to look forward, her mouth opening to call out but instead froze in an 'o' at the sight of him.

Her eyes widened.

"_Dad?!"_

She was launching herself into his arms faster than Ichigo could release the plate. It clattered onto the wooden floor, unbroken while Ichigo wrapped his arms tightly around his daughter.

"_Hi squirt"_

She laughed into the dark fabric of his haori and squeezed him tighter. She'd lost weight, he could tell, probably from spending her days running from her own home to her job at the hospital, to here. He wondered why Yuria husband wasn't keeping a closer eye on his daughter's health. It was his responsibility to force feed her dammit!

Ichigo knew the exact instant Yuria realized what 'this', him, meant. Not because she let go, but because of the way she buried her face deeper into his shoulder, the same way she used to do as a baby. Tenderly, Ichigo lifted a hand to cradle the back of her head, slowly feeling her tears dampening his haori. She was strong, like Rukia and like Hitomi-chan, but losing a parent was always heartbreaking, he couldn't imagine what losing them both at the same time would be like.

"_Shh, it's not __**that**__ bad. Mom and I will come visit you often."_

They could do that after all, to them death was nothing but a different state of existence. Rukia and he could sneak out of Soul Society at any time to see her, to spend time with their beloved granddaughter, to meet any future grandchildren, hell even to visit his son-in-law. Unfortunately his perfect solution caused her to break down sobbing.

He held her until she finally pushed back. She wiped her bloodshot eyes with her sleeves and breathed out.

"_I'm sorry Dad."_

"_It's alright. I know this isn't easy, but we'll get through it."_

He held her hand, she squeezed his. It still overwhelmed him to think his little girl was already forty years old. He was still coming to terms with the fact she was old enough to be married and have children, let alone be a decade shy of fifty. Did all parents have this much trouble letting go? He wondered. He'd have to remember to ask his Dad next time he saw him.

_e was _

"_Judging by this, Mom doesn't know yet does she?" _

She pointed at the messy plate on the floor and he smiled to mask his impatience.

"_She'll be so relieved when she sees you."_

"_She's sleeping beside my body, I was going to make her something to eat before waking her."_

He watched Yuria cringe at the reminder of his death. He was a fool for his tactlessness, but he realized all too late that the visual was not one to be taken lightly. Just because he was feeling so glad and carefree didn't change the fact he was leaving his daughter fatherless.

"_She's been eating terrible stuff lately, if she even bothers to eat at all. Everyone's worried."_

"_Your Mother is too stubborn for her own good."_

Yuria chuckled, hear eyes turning sly.

"_She's not the only one Dad."_

He responded with his characteristic lopsided grin before sliding an arm around her shoulders.

"_Come on, you can fill me in on what's happened since I became a vegetable while I cook something decent for your Mother." _

* * *

><p>Steak, and curry, and noodles and a carrot all danced together hand in hand inside Rukia's dream. They curtsied again and again before continuing on their little merry way. Slowly, the churning in her stomach called her back to the waking world. Her body demanded food and it wouldn't take no for an answer this time. She whimpered in exhaustion before opening her eyes to the darkness. She could make out the outline of Ichigo's face in front of her, stoic, still. But something was wrong… the quiet. Silence had not touched this room in months. She leapt to her feet like the warrior that she was and ran toward the heart monitor. It was off, the plug, disconnected, Ichigo? She turned, her hands seeking out his cold face. He felt colder than her hands. Her fingers sought out a pulse on his neck, nothing. Finally she laid her head on that spot on his chest she knew so well.<p>

Silence.

The heart that had sung her to sleep for over forty years was still.

She stayed there, with her ear against his chest. Slowly tears threatened to spill but she fought them back along with the weight inside her throat. She would not mourn. He wasn't dead, just in Soul Society already. His soul was probably automatically sent there somehow. She'd go to him soon enough. Rukia stood over the body of the man she loved, fighting back the grief, when she suddenly became aware of voices coming from outside the bedroom. Yuria? She wondered. Then she heard it, laughter, very familiar deep laughter, and food. It was the smell of food that had woken her up, Yuria was making her something in the kitchen. She walked closer to the door, she could hear chatter but it was the laughter accompanying Yuria's that made her step outside.

Her heart thundered at the sound of a voice she had not heart in thirteen days and she found herself running the short way to the kitchen as if she was charging into battle. Then just like that she was there, enveloped in the light and cooking vapours of the kitchen. Yuria stood in front of the stove, a smile on her face and beside her, sticking out like a sore thumb in a black haori stood a ridiculously young looking Ichigo.

"_Mom, look who I found wandering around the house!"_

"_Oi, I'm not a damn ghost!" _He laughed. _"Right Rukia?"_

Her name in his lips washed over her like a magic spell, allowing her to move again. She walked toward him, taking in his smile, his bright orange hair, he looked no older than eighteen, maybe younger. She reached to touch him, her hands cupping his jawline. He was real. He was here.

With a sigh of utter relief Rukia finally allowed herself to return the stupid smile he was giving her, along with a lovely kick to his left shin that made him cry out in pain.

"_Fuck Rukia!"_

He held his injured limb with righteous indignation while glaring at his wife.

"_Good, you're feeling pain."_

With eyes full of sudden indifference she strode right past him and without warning, pulled her daughter into a tight embrace. After a lifetime of watching her parents interact Yuria allowed herself to relax in her Mother's arms.

"_How did the conference go?"_

From over her mother's shoulder Yuria could see her Father awkwardly rubbing the side of his face.

"_It went fine Mom."_

Rukia's arms tightened and Yuria was startled to realize her shoulder was becoming damp.

"_How's my little star?"_

With her mother's voice so full of emotion Yuria had to force herself to remember how her twelve year old daughter was doing.

"_She keeps pestering me about spending the weekend here. She misses you."_

Suddenly Yuria had the overwhelming need to break down sobbing again. Not out of her own grief, but from the realization that her daughter would never get to spend any more lazy weekends with her grandparents. Thankfully it was then that Rukia finally pulled away.

"_We'll be right back."_

Rukia gave Yuria's hand one last squeeze before turning around and walking out of the kitchen. Knowing that by 'we' she meant him, Ichigo offered his daughter a reassuring smile before going after his wife.

Sighing, Yuria turned her attention back to the stove, realizing that even at forty she was still not able to face her Mother's tears.

He wasn't surprised to see she was going outside. He followed her blindly past the veranda to the side of the house. She stopped in front of their tree, the one they always seemed to hold all their important conversations under. It'd been here where they'd discussed what to do when that Hollow threatened the town all those years ago, and it'd been here where he'd told her he had terminal cancer a year ago. Even after Yuria moved out and there was no longer a single reason to keep them from fighting in the comfort of their own home, they still came out here.

"_I'm sorry."_

And he was, sorry for putting her through this, sorry for making her this upset. But still she refused to turn around.

"_Rukia, please…"_

He walked closer till he was but a breath away from her. Firmly, he placed his hands on her small shoulders and after feeling her relax into the touch he gently turned her around to face him. Her eyes revealed a broken heart. One that had spent weeks watching the person it loved slipping away further and further into a place she could not reach. Tenderly, he cupped her jawline and dipped to claim her lips before she could remember why she was upset with him in the first place. His arm slipped around her abdomen, lifting her up against his chest, causing her to automatically wrap her legs around his waist. He delighted in her taste, in her passion, in the way her tongue played with his and the delicious friction of her hips. God help him, he had not been this turned on in years, a disadvantage of age and chemo. Now he wanted nothing more in the universe than unite their Riatsus in that delicious manner he remembered from so long ago. After a good fifteen minutes of desperate kisses and grinding, Rukia brought their fruitless urgency to an end.

"_This is ridiculous."_

She panted the words against his neck, her arms holding on his neck in what was surely a death grip.

"_It's not that bad."_

He breathed in the smell of her shampoo and enjoyed the way the chilly night air arose goosebumps on the exposed flesh.

"_It is that bad. I can't tear your pants off and you can't draw out my Riatsu."_

"_Well you could leave your Gigai long enough for a quicky." _

The suggestion earned him a half-hearted smack on the back of his head.

"_Idiot, you know the moment I step out of my Gigai we'll have half of Soul Society here ready to take us back."_

He groaned in frustration. Long ago, when Ichigo accepted to become the next Captain Commander of the Gotei 13, he'd struck a deal with the Captains. Only if Rukia's gigai stopped functioning could anyone come collect them.

"_Shit, I forgot about that." _

She muffled a wave of silly uncontrolled laughter with his shoulder and he rejoiced at the sound. They stayed like that, frozen in an embrace neither wanted to break till the sound of Rukia's stomach churning reminded him of his original mission.

"_There's food inside."_

"_Yeah."_ But she moved her head to press light kisses over the sweet skin of his neck, eliciting a groan. She didn't want to move. Going inside would mean having to call Seiya and tell him Ichigo was dead. It'd mean waiting for the mortician's van to arrive and take his body away to be cremated before the funeral.

She wasn't ready to end this brief moment of happiness yet, not after so long.

"_Rukia."_ He warned, pleadingly.

She sighed, reluctantly surrendering to the realities of their life yet again.

"_Fine, let's go inside. Yuria will worry."_

"_Knowing us as well as she does, she knows what we're up to."_

They chuckled together, thinking back to their daughter's immaculate timing for walking in on them in the most inappropriate of times.

Slowly, Ichigo lowered Rukia back to the ground, his hands coping a feel all the way. He heard her whisper _'Hentai'_ into his ear but kept his cheek against her temple if only to feel her breath.

"_We can do this Rukia."_

He whispered, his voice leaving no room for doubt. She nodded her head and believed him, because after all, Ichigo never broke his promises.

Rukia was not paying attention.

The Kuchiki in her reprimanded her for it.

"_How dare you daydream while holding your husband's ashes!"_

However, the Kuroki in her couldn't manage the care when said husband was having the time of his life burning out incense sticks while the priest chanted. The little prank was obviously freaking most of the guests out, all except for Yuria and an elderly neighbour who couldn't manage to keep a straight face. Rukia's grip on the urn tightened while she glared daggers at her husband but it was the sound of soft sobbing that brought her attention back to the present situation. Beside her, her little granddaughter dressed all in black, tried to keep her little sobs at bay.

"_My poor little star"_ Rukia thought fondly. What a pity it was that the girl could not see spirits, if she could she would not be so heartbroken. If she could, she'd be like her mother, biting her lips to keep from laughing at her Grandfather's foolish pranks. Instead she bore the full force of the loss and Rukia could not bear to think this was just half the heartbreak. In less than a month she herself would be stepping out of her Gigai and another funeral would follow. Another wear for her granddaughter's mourning clothes. How Rukia wished she could put the urn on the ground and console her little girl.

From the back, the sudden sound of footsteps shuffling accompanied the chanting. Rukia turned to catch a glimpse of what was surely newcomers and smiled in relief at the sight of old familiar faces. An old favourite phrase of Ichigo's came to mind, 'The more things change, the more they stay the same'.

An older looking Inoue waved excitedly at her, the soft lines around the eyes were all that told of her age. She'd grown her hair out, Rukia noted, two years ago when she'd last seen her she'd had it cut to the neck. Beside Inoue, stood her husband Ishida looking every bit more like his father with each passing year. His hair was almost entirely white now but he made for a very handsome middle aged man. Sado too was aging well, with hair still jet black and cut in a way that made his beautiful eyes visible to all. She wanted to go to them, to greet them and hug Inoue but she couldn't, not until the priest finished chanting. Rukia turned her gaze back to the front only to watch in horror as Ichigo chose that particular moment to lift the remaining burning incense sticks and rearrange them in the shape of bunny ears. The charade caused a mixture of horrified half screams and laughter in the guests which only intensified when the priest emitted a high pith scream and began ordering the spirit of Kuroki Ichigo to cross over. No sooner was the command spoken that Ichigo took hold of the framed picture of himself on the table, and slowly lifted it a good twenty centimetres. The display effectively cleared out the large crowd, priest included, in record time. Rukia stood, straight as a stick glaring promised death at her husband till she realized her little granddaughter was doubled over in laughter.

The idiot's plan had worked.

With only the closest of friends and family left, Rukia sighed in relief.

"_Mom did you see their faces?" _

Yuria's eyes sparkled with mirth and Rukia knew she would be congratulating Ichigo personally were she not surrounded by her husband, daughter and Seiya. With a look that meant business Rukia shoved the urn into Yuria's hands and marched forward, crazy claims be damned.

"_What the hell do you think you're doing Ichigo?"_

The culprit supplied a silly, youthful smile in response so Rukia didn't bother to control the punch she delivered to his solar plexus. Ichigo cursed and leaned forward in pain thus allowing Rukia to take hold of his left ear. To most bystanders, it looked like Kuroki-san had rightly lost her mind, but for those who could see Ichigo in all his shinigami glory, it was the most entertaining funeral they'd ever attended.

"_You ruined your own funeral you fool. I hope you're happy, the whole town is going to be talking about this for the next century!"_

"_Oh come on Rukia, I'm entitled to a little fun here, plus it cheered everyone up" _

That she could not deny, he'd even managed to save her from an endless line of well-meaning condolences. Her heavy exhale told Ichigo he'd been forgiven but she still did not release his ear, instead she dragged him forward toward his old friends.

"_Nice going Kurosaki, you just slashed a few years off the life of a few dozen people." _

Ichigo's pained grimace disappeared immediately, his senses placing Ishida's voice before even seeing him.

"_Yeah, I'll be sure to write out the name of your hospital in blood so they know where to go get treated."_

Both men shared matching smiles and affection filled Ichigo's gaze as he went over the faces of his old friends.

"_Kurosaki-kun, you look so young!"_

The compliment made Ichigo rub the back of his neck in embarrassment.

"_Thanks. You don't look so bad yourself Inoue."_

She laughed shyly in response, her hand stretching to seek out her husband's in remembrance of some ongoing joke.

"_Well I certainly feel the years. The only one who hardly looks a year over forty is Kuchiki-san!"_

Ichigo slid an arm around his wife's shoulders, his eyes coming to rest proudly upon Rukia's face.

"_Yeah, I've been accused of robbing the cradle more times than I can remember."_

"_I don't think __**you**__ were the one robbing the cradle Ichi-nii."_

He didn't bother making his surprise at seeing Karin for the first time in what was surely six years. His little sister was now a woman in her fifties and while frown lines marked her face, she was smiling softly at him.

"_Karin"_

"_Hi Ichi-nii"_

"_I didn't see..."._

"_I was hiding in the back. I wasn't sure if I had the guts to attend my own brother's funeral."_

"_Yuzu?"_

"_She sends her love. She says you better go visit her as soon as you can get a gigai."_

They laughed softly together, but Karin's eyes could barely hold back tears. Taking hold of Ichigo's hand on her shoulder, Rukia regained his attention.

"_Ichigo, why don't you take them up to the house while I finish here?"_

"_Will you be ok on your own?"_

His concern amused her. She'd survived decades without him in soul society, seventeen months on her own when he lost his powers and thirteen days hearing nothing but the sound of his breathing. Of course she could manage an hour on her own, yet he'd refused to leave her side for two straight days.

"_I won't be alone."_

She tilted her head at the direction where their daughter, son-in law, granddaughter, and Seiya stood.

"_Alright, but don't be long."_

She bit her bottom lip to keep from laughing. Ichigo's sudden reversal into the early times of their 'marriage' bordered between incredibly annoying and ridiculously comforting.

"_Sure... I will see you all in a bit_." She smiled warmly at everyone before breaking out of Ichigo's half embrace and walking the short way toward the rest of their family.

Rukia lay alone on the queen size bed facing Ichigo's side. He wasn't there, not in body or spirit. His body was neatly contained in a pretty urn sitting by the bookshelf in the living room, his spirit was still talking to Karin in Yuria's old bedroom. He'd been up there for three hours already and something told her it'd be a while yet before poor Karin got any sleep.

It occurred to her, quite suddenly, that she had not slept alone in a bed or futon in over forty years. Even during these last months when Ichigo had been hooked to machines she'd refused to sleep anywhere but by his side. The thought made her smile even though the Shinigami in her warned her against the dependency. Their lives were about to change drastically and the responsibility that awaited them was not to be taken lightly. How would Ichigo cope? Would his old hero complex return in full swing? Or would he rule in a similar way as Yamamoto had done? Either way his hands would be tied with whatever the High Council of Soul Society decided.

"_How come you're not sleeping already?"_

She looked up in surprise, startled by his sudden presence. She kept forgetting his steps were no longer heavy against the wooden floor.

"_I was thinking."_

He shook his head in an affectionate sort of way, wordlessly telling her that she still baffled him sometimes.

"_You should leave that for tomorrow. You need to get some rest."_

He unfastened his Zanpakuto and laid it out on the very edge of the bed.

"_Says the fool who just kept his little sister up half the night."_

He went under the covers and laid down flat on the bed, his arms rising to cradle the back of his head in a boyish way. It made her feel like she was staring at a ghost.

"_You little hypocrite, I could hear you and Inoue gossiping all the way from Yuria's room till an hour ago."_

She grinned but didn't retaliate. Years ago the name would've earned him a smack to the ribs, these days however she'd learned not to hit him for calling her out on the truth. They'd talked about it tonight, Inoue and her, how the years and marriage had changed them. For Inoue depending on someone had given her boundless confidence and the courage to try out new things. For Rukia falling in love had given her the kind of existence she never in all her years, thought she'd have, a joyful one.

"_Karin wanted to talk. She said she needed to get some stuff off her chest."_

It was somewhat cruel to be reminded of the other side of the coin just when she was feeling so content but it didn't entirely surprise her. Their relation with Karin had been strained for so long it now seemed normal to approach her with caution. Karin had never really forgiven Ichigo for leaving her and Yuzu behind, even if the latter had. With time the drift between them had grown so far that they barely spoke but twice a year, on birthdays and new years.

"_That's great."_

"_Yeah, it was. Kinda feels like I have her back... except I'm dead."_

Rukia reached out to place a hand over his chest.

"_We'll go visit Ichigo. This isn't goodbye."_

He covered her small hand with his own and squeezed.

"_Yeah..."_

Ichigo turned his head to look at her. Thanks to his Riatsu he could see her clearly despite the darkness. She was staring into space with the same hollow expression she got when she thinking non-pleasant thoughts.

"_Rukia. I love you."_

He watched with pure delight as a beautiful smile broke through the stoniness.

"_You've gotten soft in your old age."_

"_Maybe, but I've spent forty years being thankful you came with me."_

She felt her heart fill up with happiness at his words. Somehow he always managed to read her like a book.

"_I'm glad I came with you." _She whispered.

"_That's saying something considering you've spent forty plus years in the most boring town in Japan with me for company."_

She muffled a laugh with the pillow, her eyes sparkling with mirth.

"_Well not just with you, I've had Yuria and a few others to keep me sane."_

She didn't need to see his face to know he was annoyed but she squealed when his hands seized her upper arms to turn her flat on the mattress. She could feel his face just above hers, his legs straddling her, his pelvis purposely pressed against her thighs.

"_So I cause insanity?"_

Giving up on the banter she lifted her head to capture his lips. It caught him off guard, he hadn't expected it so soon but suddenly she was devouring him in the most maddening way. He wanted to do something, undress her, kiss her, ravage her, anything to alleviate the need. But nothing would work, because he was dead, and she was still in a Gigai. How had Rukia managed all those years ago when they'd been in the reversed situation? Perhaps it'd been easier for her to stay in control of her desire under the clumsy fumbling his virgin self. But part of being a good Commander, he thought, was knowing which battles to win and which to lose. So with a plan in mind he decided to do the only thing that he could do for her under the present circumstance.

Rukia didn't quite realize he had taken off her sleeping gown and underwear until she felt his mouth on the tip of her breast. She moaned in both surprise and pleasure as his teeth playfully nipped the tender skin. It was different, she'd felt his mouth against her so many times before but never quite like this. His mouth wasn't as hot as usual nor was his tongue as moist as when he was alive. Instead his mouth felt lukewarm and his breath felt like the wind. It turned her on.

She wanted him inside so much, but the working part of her mind reminded her that was impossible. He kissed his way down and finally released her arms while nuzzling her soft thighs. It took her a whole second to realize his plan.

"_Ichigo don't! The others will"_

He slipped two fingers inside her sex, effectively cutting her off.

"_Then you better be very quiet Rukia."_

She bit her lower lip in frustration. How could he not care when his friends were right outside? But then his fingers began sliding in and out and all coherent thought left her. Instinctively she covered her mouth with the back of her hand, ready to bite down on the skin to keep from making a sound.

He teased her for what felt like hours, carefully engraving every little detail of her climax into his soul. They'd have many, many more nights of pleasure once they were both in Shinigami form, but never again would he get to watch Rukia's body orgasm like this. After all, lovemaking in spirit form was all about joining the soul and Riatsu with the other person's, and while there was a climax, it was a different kind altogether.

"_You're a dirty old man Ichigo."_

She was gasping still, her pleasured body desperately trying to regain control of her rampant heart. Yet still he refused to stop touching her. Lying down on his side he pulled her against him, spooning his now naked body with hers. His left hand caressed gentle patterns against her skin, tickling her a little.

"_I want to enjoy these last few days as much as possible."_

"_I'm not going anywhere Ichigo. If anything the sooner I shed my gigai the sooner you can get some too. You must have the worst case of blue balls."_

He was forced to drown his laughter into her shoulder.

"_You have no idea"_ He managed to say through the convulsions.

"_Oh but I do."_

It intrigued him to hear her refer back to a time before they came to town. It wasn't a taboo subject per say, it just didn't come up often anymore. They'd spent decades forcing themselves to live only in the present, a habit that was too late to break now. Still he found himself sporting the curiosity of youth long lost.

"_Were you tempted to jump me as a __**boy**__, Rukia?"_

She could practically hear his pompous smile but she was too exhausted to play along.

"_Yes."_

She felt his toothy smile against her neck before gently holding her earlobe hostage between his teeth.

"_You've just admitted to being quite the pervert, __**Sensei**__"_

She sought out his hands over her skin and interlaced their fingers.

"_We're really well matched then aren't we."_

He chuckled and gently squeezed her body deeper into his embrace. He tried to think of a way to pry further into her past desires about him, but he could feel her body loosening in his arms, exhaustion finally overcoming her. Eventually her breathing evened out and Ichigo took comfort in the thought that once again, she was right here.

The night had not always been kind to Ichigo.

Nightmares had always haunted his dreams. This night however, it brought him a long lost memory he'd put aside long ago. It shocked him to realize he'd forgotten, embarrassed him to think Rukia knew that he'd forgotten. But he'd been so charged with monstrous Riatsu then that it didn't entirely surprise him. He'd been drunk on it, the power, the heat of the moment, the adrenaline. Plus the first week after that was still nothing but a blur. He remembered moments of it, clenching Rukia's shoulders as he asked her to run away with him, looking over his sleeping sisters for the last time, running to see Urahara. But still, how in the world could he have forgotten pushing Rukia up against a tree trunk in some forest of Rukongai and having his way with her?

He remembered flash stepping through districts of Rukongai with Rukia in his arms. He remembered finally stopping in the middle of nowhere, tress all around them... why had he stayed in Soul Society? Why hadn't he rushed to Karakura the moment he finished threatening the whole of Sereitei? Try as he did he couldn't remember. What he did remember was letting Rukia down to check for wounds. They'd put her in that awful white robe again which he nearly tore to pieces checking her over. She'd caught his hand then, firmly, forcibly.

"_Ichigo, stop!"_

That'd been enough to keep him from undressing her. But what after that?...

He'd kissed her, no, more like fucked her with his tongue. He remembered how he'd bent her backward from the force of his kiss. One hand buried in her dark hair to crush her lips with his, another around her waist to squash her tiny body to his.

He'd probably hurt her but she never said anything. In fact, he remembered feeling relieved when her arms wrapped around his shoulders and neck, holding him with matching need. He'd pushed her up against a tree trunk then and forced his Riatsu into hers without a thought. Instead of waiting for her to offer her very essence, he'd pushed his way in and blended their souls the way she'd taught him. He remembered the euphoria it gave him, the relief and utter peace, the feeling that he was finally whole. When they'd finally recovered and their Riatsus were no longer conjoined, he remembered feeling like he'd just woken up from a nightmare. What had he done then? He'd picked her back up, her arms fastened around his neck and he didn't put her down again until they were in the relative safety of his own room in Karakura.

How could he have forgotten?

He shook his head in disbelief and glanced over at Rukia sleeping soundly beside him. It was just past dawn now, he hadn't bothered with sleep. He felt energized and according to his wife, with the level of energy he was displaying, he wouldn't really need to eat or rest for a couple more days.

But perhaps the true reason for his insomnia was the knowledge that his life was about to change drastically. The moment he stepped into Soul Society the responsibility of all thirteen squads would fall on his shoulders. He definitely wasn't looking forward to it. Deciding he wouldn't bother with it till he had to, he forcibly removed the thought from his mind and instead took to peeping under Rukia's blanket.

Perverted old man indeed, but when one had gone without a sex drive for as long as he had perversion was not an issue. He hadn't minded getting old till he got sick, that's when his life took a nose dive. And Rukia had been right there by his side through it all, just as she always had been. He owed her so much it baffled him to think about it.

What would their lives have been like if they had been allowed to stay in Karakura? He wondered. They would've grown old alongside their friends, would've watched his nieces and nephews grow up while desperately yearning for children of their own. They would've aged surrounded by people he'd known forever, who knew of spirits and Hollows and Soul Society. Most importantly, they never would've raised Yuria. Ichigo dismissed the thought immediately. His daughter was his pride and biggest accomplishment in life. He was utterly content with the living life he'd had, his only regret was not being as close to his sisters as he would have liked, especially Karin.

Fed up with his thoughts, Ichigo got up from comfort of their bed, put his Shinigami robes back on, fastened his Zanpakuto and quietly left the room.

* * *

><p>They arrived in Karakura at night on a warm summer night. Isshin was so eager to bring his oldest home he didn't bother arguing when his daughters headed straight to their own homes, families and lovers from the terminal. In fact his good mood improved even further when, upon arrival at the Kurosaki family clinichome, both Captain Hitsugaya and Kuchiki declared they had to report back to Soul Society. So he, his son and his son's family were left alone in the living room of a house that had long grown too quiet for the old doctor to withstand. With a heart full of joy, Isshin knelt before the now wallpaper sized picture of his late wife and proceeded to formally introduce Rukia and Yuria with all the theatricality possible. Thus prompting Ichigo to punch him (albeit mindfully) on the ribs and lead his family up the stairs. With Ichigo sporting a furrowed brow, Yuria knew to go to her Mother for the questions.

"_Mom, was the lady in the picture Dad's mom?"_

"_Yes"_

Looking back at her so-called grandfather still kneeling on the floor, whining at the picture about how his ungrateful son treated him, Yuria thought she finally understood why her parents never talked about him.

Once upstairs, Ichigo set down the two large pieces of luggage he was carrying and with steady hand, turned the knob of the first door in the hallway. He'd expected to find his old room converted into a girl's bedroom for either of his sisters. Instead he felt himself stepping back in time to a place he had not seen in a good twenty years. Everything was just as he'd left it, from the posters on the wall to his old guitar to his university textbooks. While Ichigo's heart recovered, Rukia was quick to turn on the lights and bring their bags inside. Yuria followed in after her Mother, her eyes eager to peer into her Father's past.

"_Was this your room Dad?"_

"_Yeah it was... it's just as I left it."_

Ichigo ran his hand over the smooth surface of his old work desk. Piles of stacked books still covered most of it making it look as if he'd just stepped outside for dinner. His bed was neatly made though it looked like it had not been touched in years. Even the curtains in the room gave the impression time had stood still in this portion of the world only. Finally, Ichigo's eyes came to rest on the closet doors and a smile worked its way through the nostalgia.

"_Your Mom used to sleep in there."_

Rukia chuckled at the memory and Yuria's eyes immediately shot to the closet.

"_She did?"_

She was quick to slide open the doors, expecting to see a little futon but finding only folded blankets and clothes.

"_Where?"_

Yuria's doubtful tone made Rukia hold back a laugh. Smiling, Rukia ran her hand over the folded blankets covering a longer compartment in the closet.

"_Right here."_

"_Why?... actually never mind, I don't want to know."_

Yuria's blush caused Rukia to burst into laughter. After a having a chuckle himself, Ichigo took pity on his daughter.

"_It was back when Mom was teaching me about Shinigamis and Hollows."_

Understanding filled Yuria's face as she realized the whole thing about her Dad being a Shinigami must have all been kept a secret at the beginning.

"_Ichigo, I'm taking Yuria to the twin's room."_

Traces of laughter still tinted Rukia's voice and it relaxed Ichigo to hear it. He nodded his reply.

"_I get my own room?"_

Yuria's eyes suddenly sparkled and she picked up her bag with renewed interest as Rukia led her daughter out into the hallway.

"_Yes and I think there's still two beds for you to choose from."_

"_Well no matter what I'm sleeping on Aunt Yuzu's bed, I'm scared if I touch Aunt Karin's the pillow will rattle at night." _

Ichigo could hear Rukia trying to stifle more laughter if only for propriety's sake. It made him incredibly thankful to have Yuria here with them.

Minutes passed before Rukia came back into the room. She found Ichigo sitting on his old bed frowning.

"_How nostalgic."_

He looked up from his thoughts into Rukia's bemused expression. She stood leaning by the doorframe, a patient look in her eyes.

"_Yuria's unpacking. She took Yuzu's side of the room." _

He said nothing but stared blankly at the closet door in front of him.

"_You're in a good mood."_

There was just the slightest hit on resentment on his tone. As if he couldn't understand what part of this guilt trip was enjoyable.

"_I don't think it's so bad being back here, just the three of us, and your Dad."_

"_So what, you want us to live here now?"_

He sounded juvenile even to his own ears, but the sentiment was there. Sighing, Rukia shut the door behind her and walked closer till she was standing just an arm-reach away. Instinctively he looked into her eyes though his expression remained stubborn.

"_Ichigo... stop acting like a brooding idiot. You're too old for it now."_

His eyes widened as if not believing she wouldn't even give him the pleasure of feeling sorry for himself.

"_How am I supposed to act then? Like we're on a fucking vacation?"_

Her first instinct was to punch him for his insolence but motherhood and years of marriage had left their footprints. Instead she took hold on his chin and bent forward till her face was leveled with his.

"_Yes! Because believe it or not Ichigo we __**are**__ on vacation. We always thought we'd never be able to come back here or get to see anyone again! We were __**banished**__ Ichigo! Yet here we are now and all you can think of is how guilty you feel? Is that the way you want to live from now on?"_

As usual, her logic left him feeling sucked dry. His anger evaporated and suddenly he was feeling guilty for an entirely different reason.

"_Answer me!"_

His eyes snapped back to hers. Surprised to realize she wanted an answer.

"_No! If course not."_

"_Good! Cause I don't either. So wipe that look off your face and go see what your sisters did to their room." _

She gave him a quick peck on the lips before releasing his chin. Taking a hold of the nearest suitcase she threw it down and started to unzip it.

"_Do you want me to hel-"_

"_Go!"_

Quickly, he sprung to his feet and walked to the door, stopping only to catch a glimpse of Rukia placing their folded clothes on the bed.

He would've rather been fighting Aizen, the Vandereich, and ten Arrancar than to be standing in the middle of the crowded living room forcing a smile. He even would've rather be treating all the eighty-plus-year-old residents of Karakura rather than hear the phrase _'Guess who it is!'_ one more time. Saying Ichigo was beyond overwhelmed by his Dad's idea of a Welcome Home party was an understatement. He stood trying to make small talk with people he had not spoken to in twenty years in what was quickly becoming a new form of torture.

Last night had been easy, hopeful even. They'd had a nice late dinner with his Dad after unpacking and he'd even agreed to have a **small** gathering of old friends in a few days. He'd **enjoyed** thinking about how nice it was to be back in his childhood home with his family while Rukia snuggled tightly against him in the single bed. Little could he have imagined that his Father had had this party all set up and ready to take place the very following afternoon. It'd been pleasant at first, seeing the old faces, greeting old friends and acquaintances. But after three hours and dozens of hardly remembered strangers, Ichigo was beyond fed up. Worse still he'd been led away from Rukia and Yuria a while back when most of his old High School classmates arrived and insisted they all catch up.

From across the room, through the crowd of old forgotten faces Rukia **knew** the instant Ichigo was about to snap. She could only see his back, but it was enough. Excusing herself from the current small talk she was stuck in, she gracefully threaded her way to her husband's side. He was so tense he nearly jumped when her small hand wrapped around his forearm.

"_I'm sorry to interrupt everyone! But Ichigo have you seen Yuria? I can't find her anywhere."_ Her even tone and friendly smile charmed Keigo, who having four kids himself was quick to offer understanding.

"_Oh don't worry about us Ichigo old-pal. We'll be here a while longer."_

"_Thanks, excuse me everyone." _

Grabbing hold of Rukia's hand and wearing the same frozen smile, he rushed to make his way through the crowd. His eyes desperately searched for a way out, the staircase was blocked with people, the kitchen was full and the bathroom probably occupied. Finally his eyes came to rest upon the closed door that separated the house from the Kurosaki family clinic. Narrowing in on his target, he tightened his hold on Rukia's hand and with the grace of a hunting panther made his way to the door, hoping his Dad had left it open. The door blessedly gave with just a turn of the handle. Shutting it behind them, he near galloped his way to the end of the hallway before pushing them both into an examination room. It was there that he finally allowed his face to relax into a full, very pissed off scowl.

"_That fucking old man! I'm going to kill him!"_

As Ichigo began pacing the width of the tiny room Rukia released a relieved sigh. They would be safe here for now. She doubted anyone would dare come in here unless his sisters or Isshin came looking for them. Formulating her plan on the spot, Rukia took a seat on the examination cot.

"_He had no fucking right! In what deranged mind does it seem a good idea to just shove the past down someone's fucking throat!"_

Quietly, Rukia pulled the elegant black silk blouse she was wearing over her head. She folded it carefully before placing it by cot's pillow.

"_There's people here I'm sure I've only met ONCE before in my life! Even my fucking preschool teacher is here!"_

Reaching behind her Rukia quickly unhooked her lacy black bra and slid it down her arms. It was the sight of her pink nipples stiff against the cool air that finally stopped Ichigo mid-stride.

"_What are you doing?"_

"_Fool, what does it look like I'm doing?" _

She was already pulling up her skirt and removing her black panties before he could think of a response.

"_Are you..? I mean do you want us to...? Is that why you brought me here?"_

"_No, __**you**__ brought us here, I just followed you. Coincidentally it is the least likely place anyone will barge into right now."_

"_What about Yuria?"_

"_She's in the backyard talking with Inoue and Ishida's kids." _

Ichigo's confused expression melted into disbelief. A sly smile slowly made its way onto his lips, replacing the scowl.

"_A quicky then?"_

"_Or not so quicky. We'll play it by feel." _

Her devious smile stopped all coherent thought and his hands were on her in a heartbeat. His fingertips caressed her lower jaw as he dipped in to claim her lips. His right hand slid downward from the side of her neck toward her soft breasts. He'd always loved touching her, her hands, her legs, back, breasts. He'd worshipped every inch of her. He knew the taste of her skin and the sound of her moans, he even knew the taste of her tears. But for now all he wanted was drown out the horrible anxiety that was filling every nerve in his body. He needed to feel that amongst this party of left-behind people, forgotten faces and guilt, Rukia was here with him, keeping him grounded. As his hands traced the length of her smooth back he could feel Rukia unfastening his pants and one hard tug later they were pooled around his ankles. She drew him closer using her legs, encouraging him to take over while she worked on getting his dress shirt buttons undone.

Slowly, he slid inside her. They were both so ridiculously ready that he grinned against her lips. They went slowly at first, each taking comfort in the feeling of being part of one another, of belonging. He enjoyed staring into her eyes as the friction slowly built up, watching attentively for the sign that would tell him to speed up. It was all in her eyes, just as it'd always been. For as much as Rukia enjoyed thinking of herself as an ice queen, she wore her emotions in her eyes. Suddenly, he saw it, her eyelids closed ever so slightly and her pupils enlarged. He quickened his pace at the sight and allowed all his frustration to burn away with each delicious stroke. Minutes later he watched his ever sensitive wife whimper and moan into completion. Soon afterward his own climax followed, leaving him spent and wobbly legged. Still breathing heavily he moved back in order to pull out only to feel Rukia's legs tighten around his hip bones.

"_Not yet."_ She whispered.

He was still crushing her to his chest, his nose buried deep in her hair. He obeyed, thinking back on all the times she'd made the same request. He'd always thought it was her small way of trying to regain the sort of deep soul connection that blending Riatsus brought.

"_Thank you." _

He said it so softly, so unlike him that she wondered just how deeply being here was affecting him.

"_What for?"_

"_For taking me out of there... for this." _

She kissed his collarbone in response. He'd been so tense all day she was sure any public outburst on his part would've ended disastrously. He simply didn't know how to cope with **this** anymore. He'd spent so many years burying Kurosaki Ichigo that he was now having a lot of trouble opening the casket.

"_They're harmless Ichigo. They're here because they want to see you."_

"_They're here to gossip."_

"_You really don't mean that."_

He wanted to tell her that he actually did mean it, but he let it go. There was no reason to remind her that he was no longer the man she pierced with her Zanpakuto all those years ago.

"_Give it time Ichigo. You're overwhelmed... we all are. Yuria didn't know how to handle all the attention either."_

She heard him bury a laugh into her hair, the way he always did when he wanted to laugh at her but feared retaliation.

"_You're handling it fine"_

"_**I**__ was a Kuchiki."_

She said it as if the surname alone held all the explanation needed and it made him smile to hear that higher-than-thou tone. He suddenly thought of all the parties she must have attended, of the countless strangers she must have had to meet and remember. It was no wonder she was so good at playing politics.

"_We really should be getting back shouldn't we."_

"_Yes."_

He exhaled deeply before trailing a series of kisses from the crown of her head to her swollen lips. While his tongue found hers once again, Ichigo used the distraction to pull out. She whimpered in response, her body already yearning for another round of love making. Reluctantly, Rukia reached for her discarded garments as Ichigo pulled up his drawers. Part of her resented how easy he had it. While all he had to do was pull up his pants and button up a shirt, she had to go through the ritual of undergarments, blouse, skirt and worry about dripping semen.

Sex itself had taken her time to get used to. It'd baffled her at first, seen silly even. She'd tried it both to please Ichigo, and to satisfy her own curiosity. She'd always known it would be a natural progression in their 'relationship,' Ichigo was a living human after all and a handsome young one at that. It was natural for him to crave intimacy in the only form he knew. So she researched the matter thoroughly in her usual way, by reading large quantities of romance manga which eventually introduced her to its sister branch, hentai. Only this time when Ichigo opened his bedroom door and found her sprawled out on the floor with hentai manga all around her, he was not amused. Recalling his embarrassed shock still made her laugh to his day. Soon after that she was thrilled to learn that while sex was different from completely uniting Riatsus, it was definitely a worthwhile experience. Even if it did involve too much cleaning up afterward. She knew that eventually she'd be the one leading Ichigo through the techniques of Soul Unions but for now she just hoped that somehow, they hadn't been gone long enough for Isshin to send out a search a party.

Dressed, combed and smiling they made their way out of their makeshift sanctuary, reassured they'd get through anything Karakura threw at them as long as they were together.

* * *

><p>She dreamt she was running through the thick forests of Rukongai, her body as light as air and sweetly warm. As she slowly came to, she smiled at realizing the morning sunlight had woken her. She wasn't sure why, maybe it was the sound of birds chirping up in the trees, or the cool mountain air kissing her nose. But her first coherent thought was a surprising one.<p>

"_It's a beautiful day to die."_

The timing was adequate. It'd been two months since Ichigo's funeral and she'd spent the better part of those months with Yuria and her little granddaughter. It'd be hard to leave them behind but prolonging it further would be a bigger sin.

Smiling, she turned to see if Ichigo was awake. His arm remained tightly wrapped around her waist but he could've dozed off. After all, the man was turning out to be a bigger night hugger in death than when he'd been alive.

"_Ichigo?"_

"_Hmm?"_

He was drowsy, but not tired. He'd learned how to doze off weeks ago after spending too many nights wandering around the house looking for ways to pass the time. He finally threw himself into learning how to relax his Riatsu after Rukia started calling him 'Ichigo, the housemaid ghost.' Now he spent his nights like a respectable Shinigami, pretending to sleep.

"_I think today's the day."_

"_The day for what?"_

"_Soul Society."_

She was so busy trying to decipher his silence that she was surprised to find herself pinned against the mattress. As Ichigo straddled her thighs his amber eyes stared deeply into hers.

"_Are you sure?"_

She took hold of his cheek, lovingly stroking the soft skin with her thumbs.

"_Yes. It's time."_

"_We could stay another few days, spend more time with Yuria."_

He was smiling so tenderly, looking at her with an expression that looked too aged for such a young face.

"_We've been postponing this long enough Ichigo."_

He shifted his weight, allowing his left hand to caress her left cheekbone. His fingertips lovingly traced each little wrinkle from the corner of her mouth to the edges of her eyes. His beautiful wife, he sometimes called her, and she truly was. He was proud of every laugh line on her face because he'd helped put it there. They were testimonies of the life they'd shared, a **full** life. Now the silver lining to the weight of Yamamoto's last hurrah was the prospect of sharing the forever of death with her too. The only thing he felt certain of now was that he was damn sure he was going to continue putting laugh lines on her face. Even if this time they took a few hundred years to appear. A toothy grin spread across Ichigo's face, making his look terribly boyish. Rukia suspected it had something to do with the prospect of finally 'getting some.'

"_Get your mind out of the gutter Ichigo."_

"_Who says it was in the gutter?"_

She answered him with an 'Oh please' expression that made him laugh and left him open to a strong punch on his solar plexus. Dismissing his pained groan, she was able to shove him sideways to land on his side of the bed. He watched her put on a robe before hurrying out of the room, most likely to the bathroom. Lying alone on the bed he had to admit she wasn't entirely off in her assumption. He wanted her so badly it was giving him weird kinks, like spying on her in the shower.

Ichigo was already on his feet and about to fasten Zangetsu when Rukia walked back into the bedroom.

"_What are you doing?"_

He looked at her curiously, surprised to see she'd come back to the room.

"_I thought I'd make you some breakfast."_

"_No, I want to lie down a little longer."_

He gave her a curt nod and placed his Zanpakuto back down again. Today more than ever he was committed to obey her every wish. Knowing her preference he removed his outer Haori before settling back down on his side of the bed. Rukia rewarded him with a pleased grin before removing both her own robe and her camisole. He leered at her from his spot, his eyes shamelessly taking her in.

He'd had the gall to complain to her about it once. It'd been years ago, back when he was still adjusting to the sight of his muscles looking soft. He'd been watching her change one morning when he asked how it was that while her face showed some age, her body did not. She'd reminded him that it was because her 'body' was a gigai, but his frown had remained. It'd taken her a while to understand the reason behind the complaint.

"_Is there anything you'd like to do today?"_

She crawled back under the covers, her body immediately seeking out his.

"_I'd like to see Yuria later on. But right now I just want to relax."_

She settled next to him, one arm draped over his torso and her head resting on his shoulder. She missed his heartbeat but consoled herself with feeling his riatsu gently pulsing against hers. It was always seeking her out now, trying to draw out her own riatsu. Knowing how to distract him she dived right into one of the two hundred topics they still had to sort through.

"_It'll be nice to see Nii-sama... and Captain Ukitake, and Renji."_

Ichigo cringed at the thought. They hadn't seen Renji at all in over forty years and he was concerned with how the hot-head would react now at having to acknowledge Rukia as Ichigo's wife. Except, as Rukia enjoyed reminding him lately whenever the widowed grocer flirted with her, she was technically not married any more.

"_As soon as we arrive at Sereitei we're getting someone to marry us."_

His utter urgency on the matter caused her to dissolve into laughter and as she wiggled with mirth beside him, his scowl grew.

"_What's so funny?"_

She tried burying her laughter against his muscled abdomen but the reoccurring image of Ichigo staring down the Kuchiki elders while demanding her hand in marriage, amused her too much to recede. Finally she regained enough control to look up at Ichigo's legendary full scowl. Decades ago he would've stormed out of the room, now he simply waited for her to apologize. Smiling sweetly, she reached out her hand to sooth away the deep lines on his forehead. Like she'd always done.

"_Fool, married or not you're still mine. And anyone concerned is just going to have to live with it, including Renji."_

"_But I __**want**__ to marry you Rukia"_

The intensity of his stare made her heart clench in the sweetest of tortures.  
><em><br>"Then you'll have to ask Nii-sama for my hand in marriage… and you'll have to go to the Kuchiki elders to do the same."_

He exhaled, his head gently shaking in disbelief. Years ago Byakuya informed them that Rukia had been welcomed back into the Kuchiki fold in preparation to her certain promotion as partner of the next Captain Commander. To Ichigo's surprise, Rukia behaved ambivalently about the whole thing, as if she no longer cared about the title she once fought so hard to uphold. He suspected she agreed only for Byakuya's sake.

"_And if the elders don't approve?"_

She lips curved into a smile.

"_Then fuck them."_

His scowl broke immediately, a smile stubbornly coming to replace it. He ran his fingers over her soft cheek, moving them to play with her dark hair while using his other arm to draw her closer until their naked chests were pressed together. He yearned for her lips, but held off. Opting instead for holding her gaze captive in order to ask her a question he hadn't dared ask in decades.

"_Any regrets Rukia?"_

He'd grown ever more fearful of the answer as time passed by, as they watched their daughter grow up and as old faces reappeared. Now more than ever the answer could crush him like never before. He desperately searched her eyes for any hints of a lie, holding her caged against him until she answered. .

"_I regret that Hitomi-chan had to die for me to know motherhood… I regret we had to hurt everyone we cared about so we could have a life together. But most of all…" She brought her forehead to rest again his, her eyes suddenly teasing. "I still regret not buying that limited edition Chappy and Friend plushie collection!" _

Eyes widening in disbelief, Ichigo's hands were quick to tickle her sides as reprisal. Rukia squealed and laughed uncontrollably as Ichigo used full force to keep her confined in the circle of his arms. Her laughter triggered its usual euphoric effect on Ichigo, making him laugh despite being the torturer. It was minutes before he finally released her to let her catch her breath.

"_Bastard."_

He heard her pant out, her face still glowing from the exertion. He chuckled and simply stared at her blushed cheeks, muffled hair and heavy inhales. He took it all as he usually did and stored it somewhere in his memory. Finally it was the sound of her churning stomach that got them both out of bed.

"_So what do you want for breakfast?"_

He asked from the door as Rukia pulled out a light blue sundress to wear.

"_You better call Yuria. Ask her to bring up some Ohagi, Wahagi and chocolate Mochi, and also some Ichigo Daifuku and Wagashi! Oh and ask her to also pick up some chicken and pork on the way. I have every intention of clogging up my gigai's arteries today."_

He rolled his eyes at the endless list of sweets and bit his tongue as his physician mind tried to stretch out its healthy head. Today was her day, if she wanted to enjoy the pleasures of taste buds till the very end she had every right. So with a resigned smile, he went to call their daughter.

Yuria sobbed all the way from the town's bakery to her parents' house. She'd considered bringing her daughter along but had selfishly decided against it. Her little girl had spent the day at Grandma's the day before. Today was Yuria's day, her very last day to have her parents all to herself before truly becoming an orphan.

That thought left her sobbing harder in the car. She parked just outside the old house, trying to pull herself together. A woman in her forties reduced to a four year old child with just one phone call. Finally, arming herself with false bravado she took her trunk-full of bags out of the car and headed to the veranda.

Once at the door, Ichigo was quick to take all bags away from her, welcoming her inside, greeting her cheerfully as he usually did. She didn't know why it surprised her, but it did. Perhaps because unconsciously she'd been expecting to find her Mother sick in bed, just like her Father had spent his last days. Or maybe it was the routine of it all. She found her Mother in the kitchen making breakfast, a huge smile on her face. She listened as her parents teased each other, her Dad warning her Mom she'd be the only person ever to gain ten kilos in one day. It was all so… normal. Yet it wasn't, because her Dad had been dead for two months and her Mom was planning on joining him today.

It was all so wonderfully weird she didn't know whether to cry or laugh.

"_You!..."_ She choked back a sob, fisting her hand in an attempt to control the tears until she said what she wanted to say. _"You have to come visit me! At least once a year… and… and I must have a way to reach you in case of an emergency! Understood?" _

She was shaking and tears were running down her cheeks but she never stopped looking at them.

"_Of course." _

Yuria pinned them with her gaze, looking for any signs of hesitance but finding none. Finally she allowed herself to sink into her Mother's arms, sobbing one last time while Ichigo tenderly stroked the back of her head.

At breakfast Yuria forced herself to cheer up and by the early afternoon she realized her heart felt lighter. She consoled herself with thoughts of seeing them again soon, with thoughts of a future with them in it. Most importantly, she tried to remember that she wouldn`t be alone. After all, she was lucky enough to have a loving husband and a cute daughter. Not to mention she lived in a little town where she could not go ten paces without greeting at least two people.

The rest of the day was spent on a cloud.

They ate, talked, ate again and ripped the living room book shelves apart looking at old momentos. The mess all began with Yuria wanting to prove her Dad wrong. Ichigo insisted she'd won a Science award on her first year of High school, when Yuria distinctly remembered it being on her second year. To settle the useless argument Rukia pulled out the photo album where she kept all of Yuria's pictures. In the end Yuria had been right, but then the hunt continued for more 'forgotten' pictures. Leading to Rukia's first official public debut of her 'secret' scrap book collection of `Father & Daughter` moments, filled mostly with pictures of little Yuria sleeping on her Father`s stomach. This was then followed by the discovery of 'missing' pictures of Yuria's wedding that Rukia 'borrowed' and never returned.

"_Mooom! I've been looking for these for fifteen years!"_

But the reprisal was lost among her laughter. Suddenly she wondered how many hidden and forgotten treasures she'd find as she cleaned out the house in the following weeks. Would she uncover some of her parents' secrets? She wondered. There was still so much more she wanted to know about them. So much more time she still wanted to spend here with them. But there wasn't any more, at least not for now.

"_They're all yours now."_

Yuria nodded, silently accepting the mantle of family-picture-keeper from her Mother. A bittersweet smile tinted her otherwise calm façade.

Then sunset arrived, bringing with it an ocean of playful pinks and baby blues. The three of them looked sadly onto the veranda, knowing it was time. Yuria watched as her Mom and Dad locked gazes, somehow communicating without words just as they'd always done. She looked down at the near empty cup of tea and waited for the imminent comment.

"_Yuria, it's time."_

She looked up at her Father's handsome face and smiled. She'd always been so proud of him. Her Dad, the town doctor, the pillar of reason, the occasional joker, the loving father.

"_Must you go today? Isn't it getting kinda late?"_

"_Postponing it will only make it worse."_

Yuria closed her eyes to keep the tears from spilling as her Mother's voice washed over her. She was right, whether it was tomorrow or the day after there was no changing what was about to happen. Her Mother in all her wisdom wanted to make this as least tormenting as possible. Finally Yuria nodded and they all got up together to go out and around the house. Rukia took her daughter's hand in hers as they walked, while Ichigo kept a hand on Yuria's shoulder.

"_Tell them I went out for a walk in the garden and when you came to look for me you found me lying dead." _

Yuria nodded, the tears she'd been fighting all day pouring down her cheeks.

"_I'll be fine Mom, don't worry."_

They finally stopped by the back of the house in an area covered by trees. Yuria took a step away from her parents in an attempt to keep herself together. Even if all she wanted was to sob like a baby she refused to part like that.

"_So what happens now?"_

She wiped her face using her shirt sleeve and pushed her long black hair back to keep it from sticking to her cheeks.

Ichigo and Rukia exchanged glances before Rukia shrugged.

"_I just step out of my gigai."_

"_That's it?"_

Yuria's surprise was mirrored by Ichigo who looked at his wife with skepticism.

"_Yes. I'm already dead, remember?"_

The thought only worked to confuse Yuria further but Ichigo nodded in understanding. It suddenly dawned on him why she'd been so cautious with her Riatsu in the last two months. With enough coaxing, he really couldn't have drawn her out of her Gigai in his search of intimacy. He grinned sheepishly.

Night was approaching quickly and seeing the stars begin their reign upon the sky once again told Rukia it was time. Sensing what was coming, Ichigo passed his arm around Yuria's shoulders, holding her closer to him.

Rukia smiled warmly, closed her eyes, relaxed her face and imagined herself falling into a cliff. When she opened her eyes again she was standing beside her gigai. She looked down at herself. The black haori she had not worn in years felt familiar against her skin and the weight of Sode no Shirayuki on her hip thrilled her. She looked up to seek out Ichigo's gaze, to share the thrill of looking exactly like herself again. She found Ichigo beaming down at her, a potpourri of emotions toning his amber eyes. They shared a moment before Yuria's voice snapped them out of their trance.

"_Mom… you look so young!"_

The shock had effectively scared away Yuria's tears and she was already walking closer to inspect her Mother's new form.

"_Well, I feel the same… more or less."_

Guessing her daughter's concern, Rukia reached out to hold Yuria's hand.

Immediately, Yuria exhaled in relief. The hand in hers felt exactly as it always did, perhaps just a little colder but just the same nevertheless. For the first time all day, Yuria finally felt like she could breathe again. She was about to speak when she noticed her Mother's eyes staring up at the sky. She followed her gaze and gasped at the sight before her.

A door. Floating in thin air.

It was elegant yet mighty, haunting but beautiful. Yuria didn't need to ask to know it was here for her parents.

"_They're impatient."_

Ichigo mumbled as he directed a seething stare at the familiar gate.

"_Of course, what did you expect? We've kept them waiting for a long time."_

She sounded proud of their defiance and it finally occurred to Ichigo, after all these years, that his wife was just as cautious and weary of Soul Society as he was. For she too had changed.

Yuria sighed with a heaviness that betrayed her heart. It was time. Time for her to stop acting like a child, time for her to be strong, time for her to say goodbye. She wanted to see her Mother and Father off with a smile on her face and she was going to do it even if she came apart the moment that gate closed. Slowly, she let go of the delicate hand that had always been so willing to hold hers.

"_It's all right Mom, Dad… Don't worry about me. I'll be fine and I'll take care of everything here… I'll see you again soon."_

She put on a worthy performance, but both seasoned Shinigami saw right through it. She was avoiding looking at Rukia's gigai on the ground at all cost. Still they said nothing. Knowing that watching her cry would only make it that much harder on all of them. Ichigo was the first to pull Yuria into his arms. He held her tightly, perhaps too tightly but she didn't complain. Instead she dropped her head to that spot on his neck she'd always liked since infancy. They pushed away in unison, fully knowing that any more would leave them in tears.

Finally, Yuria turned to face her Mother.

Rukia lifted her right hand to place it over her daughter's cheek, forcing Yuria to look into her eyes.

"_We'll always be with you but when you need to talk to us we'll let you know how as soon as we're settled."_

Yuria managed to give a small nod in understanding but her eyes were busy trying to imprint her Mother's tender eyes into her mind.

"_I'll miss you."_

"_We'll miss __**you**__."_

Yuria forced through a watery smile and Rukia pulled her forward to quickly kiss her cheek.

The sound of the gate opening on its own accord caused Rukia and Ichigo to share knowing looks. They were being told to hurry it up. Ichigo reached for Rukia's hand, clasping their palms together and interlacing their fingers. They looked back at Yuria, love and concern in their eyes.

"_It's all right."_

She reassured them but they were already levitating. They looked at her all the way to the gate, their eyes fixed on her face. She waved at them, felt silly doing it but did so anyway. They smiled back and turned around to face the open gate.

"_Ready Rukia?"_

"_No. But we'll make it anyway."_

He chuckled, once again thankful for her uncanny ability to know exactly what he meant without him having to say it. She was right, of course. After a lifetime together he knew for a fact, they'd make the best of it no matter what Soul Society threw at them. Because as long as they had each other, they'd make it work.

"_Together." _He reassured.

Rukia nodded, her eyes teasing him for being afraid. Even after all these years he still tended to be the insecure one. Perhaps because he knew he owed her more than he'd ever be able to make up for. She'd given him the one thing no one ever could, happiness, and with time their little mountain town had brought faith back into their hearts. Perhaps their ultimate contribution to Sereitei would be to bring back the humanity which had long been lost.

They'd raise hell, together. With that thought in his heart and a smile on their faces Ichigo and Rukia finally stepped into the light.

Finis

Well everyone. This is the end. I know this was a HUGE epilogue, in my defense allow me to say I never expected to write so much. Things just kept popping up as inspiration hit me. But thank you for seeing this through.

Note: I know some of you will argue that Ichigo's reaction at his Welcome Home party is cold and unlike him. All I can say to that is that, while it may be unlike the Ichigo we see in the manga, it stays true to the Ichigo in my story. In this story both Ichigo and Rukia were forcibly kept from having contact with their pasts for over twenty years. In order to deal with the disappointment and pain the experience brought, they did what any human being does as a basic survival technique, detach from the experience (ie. The past). So while Ichigo might appear cold or uncaring he is simply **processing**. In his case I'm sure that by the end of the week he would've been rebuilding old friendships and forgiving everyone.

So glad my psych undergrad is being put to good use (laughs and hits head against keyboard).

Thanks again everyone! And for any registered reviewers I promise to reply to your comments as soon as I can.

I wish you all the very best


End file.
